I have spent many years in long term relationships that never panned out. Now I am seeing a really great guy, but am not about to wait around for any man, no matter how much I love him. I don't want my life to turn out to be a series of serious relationships any more. How long is it reasonable to wait to see where it is going (not talk, but plans)?
I plan to relax and have fun, but if no plans, it has to end. I am getting to old for this... How long should I let it go on in your opinion?
2006-09-28 17:13:55 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Are you, too, familiar with the "three year slump"? If I'd made it a year with someone and was still happy, I'd usually stick it out for three. But the sad fact is, I always knew within six months whether or not it was going to work. Sometimes I wonder if true love is just a passing fancy.
2006-09-28 17:19:14 · answer #1 · answered by fearslady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i guess it does depend on how old you are and what exactly you want. do you mean engaged? married?
if this is what you mean, then i would wait a year. because you need that time also to make sure the guy is somebody you want to be serious with. and, after a year, it should be enough time for the guy to either be hooked on you also, or for him to feel you aren't "the one."
after a year, if he hasn't brought up the subject of the two of you making plans for the future, just bring it up yourself. tell him you love him and the time you've spent together, but it seems like the relationship isn't progressing. then see what he says. if he doesn't give you an answer you like, let him know you want different things than he does. then, leave the relationship.
2006-09-29 00:25:12 · answer #2 · answered by misspixy03 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say around a year mark, by then you have been together long enough to realize if you really like this person or not. You know if you might be able to spent the rest of your life with him or not. I would wait and then if he never brings it up, sit him down and ask him. Ask, what he has in mind for the two of you. Ask him where he thinks you are heading. If he can't give you an answser by then, time to leave. I would actully start kinda asking these questions at 6 or 7 months, then at a year tell him you need to know if you are heading in the right direction.
2006-09-29 00:18:30 · answer #3 · answered by collegebusygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about what kind of woman he respects. Then ask him what kind of woman he wants to marry. Chances are, it will be someone similar to his mother, unless he has learned that there are other owman out there that has qialities that she doesn;t, that do it for him.
There is nothing wrong with testing the waters and letting him know that you will not be the "milk for for free so why buy the cow". Let him know that you are not going to be just a plaything forever. Let him kow that you will move on if this isn't going anywhere. Then give it some time.
If time goes by and he doesn't want a comittment, tell him you are moving on. tell him, if he wants to come back to find you, AND IF you are still available, you give it another shot. But you can do better than to be strung along. And mean it. Stick to it.
If he really wants you, he will either discuss a permanent arrangement, or let you go. And if he treally misses you and wants you, he will come find you and propose.
2006-09-29 00:20:12 · answer #4 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this depends on what your wanting, and what your partner wants. The serious feelings that you have may become evident to you in a few weeks to months and for him it may be a few months to a year+. So I think the time you need should be based on how the both of you are meeting each others needs--emotionally, physically, psychologically, and still be friends. Your right though, don't waste your time, but don't miss out on the possibility of a good relationship, irregardless of the time. You could end up married and divorced within a year.
2006-09-29 00:43:14 · answer #5 · answered by MEDUSA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on many things like how old are you? what plans you have? what kind of relationship you have? etc
for example my husband's sister is 37 and wants to get married asap and have kids she started dating this guy and after a year he wouldn't talk about marriage so she said NEXT because at her age she can't be wasting any time. But if you're in your 20's, have your own place, and a good relationship I think 2 years is a good time to talk about marriage
2006-09-29 00:18:08 · answer #6 · answered by ani2525 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont show your breast it is for me just kidding
do what your heart tell u
u have the answer but have not yet to notice u have a smart mind
so use honey
2006-09-29 00:18:22 · answer #7 · answered by cartoonboys2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say just about 3 weeks at max dont let your self do this again.
2006-09-29 00:16:09 · answer #8 · answered by breannafae h 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think u should show him your breasts,.
2006-09-29 00:15:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋