I know there are sooo many of these questions out there...and part of me believes that if one has to ask....then the answer is already there...but, I am truly heartbroken over the following:
I am with a sweet, nice, funny, and supportive as can be man and we have been dating for the past five years after meeting in college. I have a great career and have always known what I wanted in life...the typical Type A.
My boyfriend is a polar opposite...more of a free spirit, spends all his money, has nothing saved...doesn't know what he wants to do...maybe go back to school...was laid off of work...has had a very difficult time finding a job (almost a year now)...
I love him so much, but I (selfishly) feel that I don't want to be taking care of him and having to help him figure out what kind of job he wants, editing his resume, and trying to help him learn to save money...he and my family have said that he's not good enough...Is there hope, or is it time to move on?
2006-09-28 15:09:46 · 12 answers · asked by missy202 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you love him, you should have a serious talk about how you want a future, but he needs to grow up. If he doesn't love you back enough to be a responsible man, then he isn't ready for your level.
2006-09-28 15:13:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on honey. The kind of things you described doing for him makes you sound more like his mother or care taker than a girlfriend. If you are having doubts than I would say you already know what the answer is, your heart just doesn't want to admit it yet. Also, if you let him treat you like this now he will see no reason to change if you decide to take your relationship any further.
2006-09-28 15:17:57 · answer #2 · answered by GPHS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember this: You cant change anyone. The way he is now is the way he always will be.
If you get in to a relationship hoping to change someone, then clearly that person is not for you. It's the same way the other way around as well.
Yes, I believe it's time to move on. If he says he's not right for you, then "LISTEN" to what he's saying. Don't assume you might be able to change him or his mind later, because you can't. The first person you must take care of is yourself.
2006-09-28 15:16:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
welllll really you need to follow your heart. if you have not dicussed this with him, you should give that a shot first. If he is set in not trying to be more ambitious then you should probably move on. there is always the possibility that you can talk to him and it will be fixed, there is also the possibility he has depression/ low self esteem issues (Him saying he is not good enough). there are a number of things that cause cause his situation. as for you, you need to deside how far you are willing to go. if he will not help keep your dreams going then you need to cut your losses and move on.
2006-09-28 15:17:25 · answer #4 · answered by daggermouth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to follow your heart if he is truly the one you want to be with then you shouldn't mind helping him get himself together thats what you are there for just like he should be there for you when you need him things will get better sometimes god put people through little test like this in their life just to see how strong the love is just pray to him and ask him to send you a sign
2006-09-28 15:15:26 · answer #5 · answered by tpchick22 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he aint serious about his future, why should you be? If thats how he choses to live his life, let it be. Dont keep helping him coz then he wont know the meaning of hard work. Dont make him co-dependent.Its your money gal, he needs to be mature and get into something to elp himself,.
2006-09-28 15:31:51 · answer #6 · answered by stemo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you like being his mother and enjoy being controling than gete out.With your accomplishments if your wantd to take care of a little boy than you d give birth to one. You sound to strong to have an anchor like him.
2006-09-28 15:14:49 · answer #7 · answered by Sara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move on already, hes using u, just to state the obvious. fina a guy who will help u reach ur goals, not drag u down w/ his failures. plus u deserve someone who is a winner, not a loser
2006-09-28 15:13:10 · answer #8 · answered by neverland22 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't being selfish at all. It sounds like you've been very patient. I'm sure you can do better. Maybe someone more up to your speed.
2006-09-28 15:15:06 · answer #9 · answered by leviathia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is always hope, but he needs to be shocked into being a man, he seems to wanting to be a kid almost...good luck
2006-09-28 15:12:24 · answer #10 · answered by kewl69charger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋