As a single mom who has never been married and went through prenancy and raising my son alone... I am now in a serious relationship with a man who was married for 9 years and had 3 kids with her.
He has no 'first experiences' to give. Jelous, I suppose for wanting those from him? Why do i feel like this and how do I accept it?
2006-09-28 13:30:45 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
look at it like this. he has seen everything and probably done more. the good news is that he can teach you things. learn form his experience. and as far as marriage goes, it WILL be his first to you whenever that happens.
2006-09-28 13:38:44 · answer #1 · answered by suebdoo518 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Just Me:
Take a hard look at things dear lady. If your previously married husband or beau comes home to you every night after work, and pays good attention to you, don't fret about what went down in the past. Things would be oh so easy if he never had to see the Ex again. But, and life is one big, huge BUT, kids from the previous marriage are involved. If he sees them regularly, think about how important it is for them to have some male figure in their lives. It is especially important if this male figure is their father and he actually gives a rip about them.
If he does care about them and demonstrates that by paying child support on time and giving part of his attention to them, he is probably pure gold. Might need to be especially good to that guy.
On the other hand, if you begin seeing signs... Doesn't come home at night, lots of overnight business trips,
gets dressed up fancy like before going out in the evening... Well, then you have a problem.
Take care,
Zah
2006-09-28 20:40:49 · answer #2 · answered by zahbudar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to learn to accept it or you will lose him. He is probably the man he is today because of all his experiences he already had. You may not like the man he would be without going through what he has already.
Besides you already have a child with someone else. What first (besides marriage) are you offering him? Nothing! Just love him for who and what he is. He loves you the way you are.
2006-09-28 20:34:40 · answer #3 · answered by GEE-GEE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Meet his ex.... have a picnic, just the three of you, at the end of the day, you will see why YOU not her is right for him. Have a trusted friend drop the kids off late in the evening and you will never doubt your relationship with your soul mate again!!
2006-09-28 20:41:05 · answer #4 · answered by mr.bill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting. You chose him to be involved with. It's kind of late to worry about a previous relationship and non productive if you want to move ahead with the relationship seriously and learn to enjoy each others new experiences together. It'll all be new, It'll all be good.
2006-09-28 20:34:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I felt that way too with a relationship, but in a different situation. You can still have a beautiful relationship if he is past her and his heart is with you. You can be his love and you can move with that. If you feel he is stuck in the past and cannot love you fully then do not be with him, but if you feel he can love you with his full heart then see what grows with him and yeah you can have firsts too. You can have a really strong beautiful love. We did even though it was my 1st love and not his 1st time we both had a love that stuck in our hearts and lasting memories. It did not last, but it lasted in both our hearts as our 1st love and most special love even though I was his second. Just see if he loves you or is stuck in the past and you do not deny yourself happiness just because he has a past unless he is stuck in that past. Please do not worry about it. If he is stuck in the past with his ex you better move on.
2006-09-28 20:37:51 · answer #6 · answered by adobeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to do but realize she has kids and will always be in your life as long as you are with him.But never take it out on the kids.But if they are not together and he is with you that must mean he wants you not her.
2006-09-28 20:34:43 · answer #7 · answered by LYZA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should give it more time until you know for sure that you are ready. Don;t rush it sweety, there's nothing, but TIME
2006-09-28 20:32:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋