Does anyone else feel this way...?

Question

I have a problem with letting go of my first boyfriend. Although it was a short relationship, it was beautiful and innocent (it never went past kissing),and we saw each other alot so it felt longer. But he was the one who ended it. I had dated only one guy before him but that was nothing, it was 2 dates and he wasn't even my boyfriend. I also shared my first kiss with my first bf at 20! I know it sounds late but I'm really picky. Neways, I just met another guy, we're just chatting on msn but he's nothing like my first bf. My first bf was so sweet, caring, he called all the time. Some people have told me that my first bf might not care as much as I do, now that its over, since I was 20, he was my first relationship and I had no experience, while he was 24, in grad school and more experienced. He even told me that our relationship was the "purest" one he had had! Do you think he still cares or even thinks about me, or was he just trying to get laid, but since it didn't happen he left?

Answer 1

Let me tell you something, move on. Don't even bother trying to figure out the details. And if you continue to compare any other males to your past relationships you will be doomed for a lifetime of loneliness. Just focus on you right now - give yourself a little time to breathe and when you think he's out of your system venture off into the dating scene. If he was trying to get laid and you didn't put out - too bad. There are too many women out there spreading their legs like mustard and regretting it. Good luck!

Answer 2

Awwwww sweetie, you sound like me like 4 months ago, I worked with this guy that I thought was the most adorable thing in this world, and come to find out he like me to. so we dated for like 4 month and I thought everything was going well, but one day he just ended it and never really gave me a reason why. It brought me down, I thought maybe I didn't something, maybe I wasn't religious enough (because he was really in to the church) but at the end of the day it comes down to this. No matter what the reason was or if he thinks about me which is only normal. he broke up we me which means he didn't want to be in the relationship any more. don't try to look for answers where they really is only one. move on. it's for the best email if you have any more questions, believe me when I say. I went through the same thing. all we ever did was kiss on the cheek and that was it, and it was really the best relationship I ever had. I have goosebumps and butterflies every time I saw him :)

Answer 3

Lots of people have their first love idolized as being sweet and innocent...cuz they usually are.
Doesnt mean you really got to know that person nor what problems or what greatness.
Enjoy that it was a good memory thru youthful times with a smile. Youre still experiencing life and love. Used to be people got married around your age or younger to their first sweethearts. Nowadays, the big saying is move on there's lots of fish in the sea. Be selective in your youth. If you want a sweet guy...you know what to look for. ;)

Answer 4

I am a blunt sort of guy....the answer is YES to the part about getting laid..sorry, but there it is. When a guy tells you about a "pure love," trust me, it ain't a compliment. It is an excuse to say adios. Find a guy who digs your body, wants in your pants, wants to get laid, and comes around again and again...even after he gets what he came for...that is a much better kind of love, pure or not...and it gets you a lot more rewards! And, it surely occurred to you that the guy could well have been gay, hasn't it?

Answer 5

First of all, you should commend yourself for being very selective about who you decide to become intimate with. You are person of high moral character as well.

I think that your former boyfriend did care about you enough to not try to push you into something that you weren't ready for. He was looking for more and since you weren't, he decided to break it off. That was a kind thing for him to do.

I am sure that he thinks of you from time to time.

Answer 6

your first love will be with you your whole life...my first love ended our relationship too and its been 21 years and i have married divorced and am in a 9 year relationship and i still think of that love ..heck he is an acquaintance and sometimes I wonder hm mm..what if..darling he will always will be with you but there is so much more love out there you are just tipping the iceberg...I promise you keep going meet others keep taking it slow Mr right will show up and you will still remember your first love but your Mr right will blow him out of the waters...good luck

Answer 7

Not sure why you're pining over a guy that dumped you - move on, girl. There are many (sweet, caring) fish in the sea.
Good luck!

Answer 8

I realize you feel bad that he left you, but you have to move on, and I see you're doing that good for you. He may have said it was the purest, but that was probably only because you hadn't had sex yet.

Answer 9

Let it go. You are putting way too much time and energy on this.
You are hanging on to your dream romance expectation.
It is so easy to obcess on something you want so much.
You might be scaring guys away because you want a boyfriend so much.

Answer 10

yep, he just wants to get it in..... take him off of the pedestal you have him on and then you can look at guys for who they are and stop comparing them to him... i went through the same exact thing. i compared gus to him all of the time. i was 15 when he was my bf....i didnt get another real bf until i was 20. for almost 5 years, i had him on a pedestal and compared guys to him.