I work with someone who continually cuts into conversations, looks at everyone's print jobs, out-going mail, and watches everyone like a hawk. She has a window office and she sees everyone that comes in and out. It bother me that she is constantly in other people's business and at the same time acts like she genuinely cares about people when she really does not. On top of that, she speaks down to me and treats me like an uneducated imbecile. I would like to put her in her place without being a menace and allows me to keep my job.
2006-09-28 11:49:27 · 20 answers · asked by Jess 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Sounds like you've got a queen bee type. Best you can do is steer clear of her and hope like hell someone gets her fired.
In general, these women are in the ears of bosses. This is what makes the dangerous. If you are so inclined, try to determine if the bosses care for this. In a well run organization, they will hate her and want her gone, but too many regulations to hop around. However, they really want her gone and would jump at any genuine chance to sack her. However, in poorly run orgs, the bosses feed off of this and empower her. At this point, get a new frickin job cuz it will only get worse.
2006-09-28 12:19:31 · answer #1 · answered by Manny 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I would avoid her completely. When she comes around you always act positive and smile, never letting her know anything negative about you or what is going on in your life or your work. How does she view everyone's print jobs and mail? Is she the receptionist? I don't understand that part. If you have papers, keep them in your desk. That is your private space and if she invades that, then you should make a complaint to the boss. That is completely legitimate to do and that would be standing up for yourself. I am not sure what type of comments she makes to you. If you know how rude she is, then you need toknow that she is just trying to put herself up above everyone in her mind, but down deep, she has some real issues that make her want to be this way. She must have a bad outlook on life and it makes her feel better to put others down. So, you need to ignore her comments and know that she has some real problems, not you. Don't let her get you down. If she bothers you and says mean remarks when she has no business making any comments or approaching you , just let her know that you have your tasks under control and that you will talk to her about things if you need her and that otherwise you don't need her input. Thank her for her advice, but just tell her that you can handle your own affairs. That is polite and will piss her off too, but she can say nothing bad about you really, because you were not mean or stooping to her level.
2006-09-28 12:44:02 · answer #2 · answered by just julie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your company should have an HR company where you should be able to call anonymously. That way you can keep your identity a secret, and even if nothing is done it is on record, and if someone else complains it starts to build a pattern.
People like that can turn into one of two personalities. The first is if you confront them they shut up because they are not use to people confronting them. The second type is the kind where they get pleasure out of stirring up your emotions, and no matter what you do to them directly, it will do nothing but cause you more frustration.
If she is the second type of personality then go above her head, that is the only thing you can do, but make sure you go to the right people, not someone who will defend her, but someone who is neutral. Hope this helps
2006-09-28 12:00:09 · answer #3 · answered by curly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't be that uneducated as your grammar and spelling is way better than half the people who ask questions on here!
First I must ask if others feel the same way about this woman? Not that you can answer me first, but I'm going to figure that they do.
So, the best way is to start doing it right back to her. That's right, as much as it will make your blood run cold to spend more time with her directly... do it anyway.
Pull up a chair at her desk, ask a bunch of questions, check her work, be the first to greet visitors when they come and hold the door for those who go, tell her bizarre (but not reputation damaging) things about yourself and the next time she belittles you, tell her that it would mean alot if she would take the time to get you up to speed on how to act like a *****...
Before you know it, you may annoy her more than she cares to be bothered with and may.. just may leave you alone ;-)
2006-09-28 11:56:19 · answer #4 · answered by J D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you to do is to knock the living daylights out of her. I'm kidding, but I think the best way is to publicly humilate her, at least in the office. I suppose you could resort to school pranks, like putting glue onto her chair and then when it gets set, tell all your other co-workers to look and laugh. Maybe she will become embarassed enough that she will go into a seclusion of sorts.
2006-09-28 18:03:32 · answer #5 · answered by bloop87 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she cuts into your conversation, just say,"excuse me, I am talking to my co-worker, I was not talking to you, when I want your opinion, I'll ask for it" or something to that effect. You could also go to your supervisor and complain, and explain that she is making everyone's life a misery at work, of course get a few other people onside first if you can.
2006-09-29 22:45:05 · answer #6 · answered by mitty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since she is a bold person then you be the same. tell her to mind her own business and leave you alone and what is yours alone and if she persists on doing it then tell your boss or someone with authority. She is not supposed to act that way nor do as she is doing. Report her . she will report you first chance she gets so treat her the way she does you... You cant get fired by treating her as she does you..
2006-09-28 11:57:32 · answer #7 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What about doing exactly what she is doing to you to her and let her see if she likes it?
Mind you, on second thought she will probably not see it, how about behaving as if she does not exist, the more attention you give her, the more she will think she is doing the right thing, may be suggest that she should get a life, a life of her own instead of minding everybody's life?
2006-09-28 12:22:27 · answer #8 · answered by Sophia J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your best bet is to stay on course, on your best behaviour. If she really has nothing better to do, than too bad for her. Ignore her craziness and next time she tries to read your mail, fax, whatever, slying turn it over and smile at her. Just be coy. The workplace is not where you should be getting back at people.
2006-09-28 15:38:13 · answer #9 · answered by Jennifer J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask if you can have an employee meeting and include her, then bring it up at the meeting, not mentioning her by name. Ask if anyone else has noticed this problem. If they have, discuss what can be done about it. Start your statement with "I feel..."
It's always better to bring it out in the open.
2006-09-28 11:56:19 · answer #10 · answered by The Gadfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋