after being with my bf 4 about a 2 mths i slept with him for the first time. Truthfully i expected more..i didnt even have an orgasm after having an 8 mth drought. I expected so much more. I jus think that this bad experience as changed how i look @ him sexually and is affectng our relationship..should i give him a chance to redeem himself or just leave?
2006-09-28 08:11:25 · 39 answers · asked by *Sexiness* 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You expect him to know exactly what it takes to get you going on the first time, and when he doesn't, you wanna bail.
Tell the boy what you want and enjoy!
2006-09-28 08:14:53 · answer #1 · answered by tallerfella 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Patience, an open mind and communication are all good things to have in a relationship. BUT, a lack of passion is something I would never be able to live with. Never, never, never, never, never settle in relationship. It's not fair to you. It's not fair to your partner. I have had boring sex, and I've had mind-blowing sex. I found out after one relationship ended with the "boring sex" fellow the he thought the same about me. ME?! My hub and I both think we hit the lotto everytime we're together and count ourselves lucky to have found each other. If I would have stayed with the other guy, we never would have been free to find each other and would still be sexually dissatisfied to this day. Sometimes the combination just doesn't work. No reason to force it. Follow your heart, but be honest and kind in the process. If having a fireworks sex life is important to you, then no one should be allowed to tell you what you should or should not pursue in relationship. If this is the only person whose well you're drinking from, so to speak, then it should be a darn good drink. My 2 cents.
2006-09-28 08:22:27 · answer #2 · answered by writerchick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, only a shallow person would leave their bf/gr just cuz the sex is bad. If your willing to leave him because of this, then you must not like him that much anyways - so why not, you might as well leave him. I know that if it was real love you wouldn't leave him for that, because love runs deeper than just sex. Love is a thousand different emotions rolled up into a ball of greatness. But it sounds to me like he deserves better. No offence. But to answer your question, I think you should give him a chance to redeem himself, maybe he was just nervous?!
2006-09-28 08:17:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Goodness..give it time....it was your first time with him..maybe you need to teach him a thing or two! Dont give up yet...he could turn out to be a great lover...or not! Maybe your 'drought' had something to do with it also? Maybe your body has forgotten how to orgasm? Probably not Im just saying...everybody 'delievers' differently...give it some time....if its still bad in a month..then yes...leave...if sex is an important thing to you of course...which I believe it is to everybody..only some people LIE!!!
2006-09-28 08:15:00 · answer #4 · answered by Lynne B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey anyone can fail a pop quiz...give the guy a second chance..maybe it was an off night.. if it doesn't improve drop him like a bad habit!! I dropped a very beautiful woman after 5 chances...If I had been at my hometown I would have ended the jam after 2 terrible experiences...
2006-09-28 08:24:21 · answer #5 · answered by chiefof nothing 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If sex is important to you and he doesn't satisfy you then you should leave. There is no point in subjecting yourself to disappointment throughout a relationship.
Maybe you should give him one more shot and try to let him know what to do. If he still fails, leave.
I was with a guy for a little more than a year, every time we had sex, it hurt. I always told him and it still, always hurt. I should have left but nope, stupid me stayed with him and it was the worst relationship I ever had and that's not based on just the sex.
2006-09-28 08:13:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him some pointers, we don't know everything. Tell him what you like. It is always better in a relationship if you are more open. That's why i laugh at guys who think they know everything a woman needs then later they find out that they suck. Let him redeem himself, but you have to put in your two cents as well.
2006-09-28 08:16:20 · answer #7 · answered by Dk2432 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him what you want him to do. Make it into foreplay and even a game. Spend three or four hours experimenting with your man.
If he can't get it right after that, well, do what you think you need to. In order for a healthy relationship to flourish, you need to have a healthy sex life.
Good luck
2006-09-28 08:18:19 · answer #8 · answered by Q-burt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex for the first time betweeen two people can be uncomfortable. You might just had a bad experience and/or need to get in sync with each other. Give it another go first. Good luck.
2006-09-28 08:13:09 · answer #9 · answered by camping_girl 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sex is not all that important, and maybe he needs time to get to know what you like. Give him a chance. Why wait 2 months if you gonna leave because of sex?
2006-09-28 08:15:46 · answer #10 · answered by Blondie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's only happened once...........then chill out. He was probably nervous to start with and anyone who is timid about it shouldn't have done it to start with as its just not right when you're both not comfortable. Give him another chance, if he doesn't please you.....then you're not going to be happy with him in the long run so keep looking elsewhere and leave him behind. Your question seems awfully shallow but I'm trying not to hold that against ya...so sorry if it sounds rude.
2006-09-28 08:14:55 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋