My boyfriend and I are taking a break, it was his idea at first but now I do totally agree it's what's needed. We both have issues that need to be worked on personally and really do love eachother. We both say that in the future we'd like to be together. What does he really mean when he says he needs his space right now? When a guy says that can I still call and/or text him? What's too much? Can I still expect to see him sometimes? I'm totally in love and totally confused.
2006-09-28 03:33:25 · 27 answers · asked by Julia M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it means that he doesnt like you anymore and he doesnt want to see you but he doesnt want to hurt you
2006-09-28 03:34:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Give him his space, he asked for it. Love is patient and unselfish. Love him enough to let him go, love yourself enough to not beg any man to be in your presence. Re-evaluate your position, access the problem that occurred which caused the need for separation in the first place. Everyone has personal problems, a team is better than one, any day so why break because of a personal issue? Do not call, do not text, do not see him. I know the nights are hard and the weekends too - but when you call, text or see him - you know what happens?? You go right back to square one! You may start questioning him as to why he needs space. You may start inquiring of his whereabouts? You may get upset because he isn’t responding to you the way you want him to. It hurts more when you do that to yourself.
Try this approach instead. Don’t call. NO MATTER WHAT!! When you feel the urge - call a friend, go to the gym, or write in your journal. At night, turn off your ringer (if you can) that way you won’t keep waking up at night checking your phone hoping he called. It’s torturous. If you can get away go on a trip. When I broke up with one of my ex boyfriends I went to Mexico - guess what?? I didn’t call, because I couldn’t and it cost too much. ( I needed my cash to buy drinks, lol) I didn’t tell him - he needed space - he got it. And I had fun, so much fun that when I got home, I started thinking about all the fun I wasn’t having stuck in a relationship arguing, fussing, crying and stressing. When he showed up, I was over it. Give it at least 21 days, that’s how long it takes to break a habit. The pain goes away incrementally as each day passes. The love may not go away it just changes intensity. The confusion goes away and you get clarity. It’s about you -21 days to a brand new you. Write it down- chart your progress and one day you will wake up and say, “What the hell was I thinking??”
It hurts like hell but people are surviving heartbreaks in record numbers these days. I'm a survivor and one day you will be one as well. I wish you all the best.
2006-09-28 03:59:29 · answer #2 · answered by NoPeace4Me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have never seen a situation like that go well. The way I see it, when a relationship starts to move backwards, about ninety percent of the time its on the way out. You'll have to guage this situation personally. How much space does he want? Trust your instincts. You'll know if things aren't right or are slipping away. Don't let yourself believe what you want and not see what is. It'll just get you hurt in the long run.
2006-09-28 03:57:10 · answer #3 · answered by Chris D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry gal, it sounds to me, that while he may really love you, he is wanting to test the waters and see what else is out there. He may very well love you, but him saying he needs his space but wants to maybe get back together in the future is his way of saying, "Don't go too far, I want to be single, but in case I ever want you again, I want to be able to come back" either way I think he wants his cake, and eat it too.
My advice: I am married and sometimes me and my husband need a break, (not a break up) but just some time alone, and get out and do other things. But if he was to ever say he needed space, and maybe we can get back together, I would tell him, "To make up your mind, its either me or your space." I wouldn't wait forever! Take care of yourself, and find your answer in your heart, it should be telling you what you probably already know, Good Luck, Girl!
2006-09-28 03:40:26 · answer #4 · answered by me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know what they say if you love someone let them go, and if they come back they are yours forever and if it doesn't it was never yours to begin with....but I went threw that before and it worked out fine..you probably spend too much time with one another especially if you both have problems it is hard to stay focus on your relationship...so just take your time and enjoy life...and if you happen to meet someone else and you can't help it well then I guess you did not love him like you think you did....and that goes the same for him too...Good Luck!
2006-09-28 03:39:17 · answer #5 · answered by MZ.LANDA 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It means that as much as he loves you, he is not ready to make that serious commitment right now. He is scared right out of his pants. He knows he wants to be with you in the long run, but before he does he needs to run through open fields, to live life free for awhile before erecting that fence around the field. I believe he does love you. Tell him that even though he is taking a vacation he still needs to communicate with you in risk that if he doesn't he may lose you, because you have a life to live as well.
2006-09-28 03:39:50 · answer #6 · answered by RACHAEL R 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want to commit. If you are taking a break, then you should give nothing but a chat or visit once in a while. Otherwise, you will train him to think he can have his cake and eat it too.
I'm sure he just needs some time to think things through. In the end, though, make him make a decision to commit to you or he will continue with the same shenanigans.
2006-09-28 03:39:10 · answer #7 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It means give him space. Maybe you are hanging around him too much? You should consider giving a little bit of space such as not texting him often daily is ok but hourly is crazy. Same thing goes for calling.
2006-09-28 03:37:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It means that he knows you love him, but he doesn't love you. he needs you to back off for a while. I grew up with nothing but guys so I tend to know what they really mean. Don't call him or text him. If that is something that he is comfortable with then he will call/text you. Let him draw the boundaries.
2006-09-28 03:36:39 · answer #9 · answered by jdecorse25 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It means he is getting too much pressure from you and will like to slow down. So give him a break and pretend it mean nothing to you. If he actually love you, the fire in him will pick up again and then you will go all the way.
2006-09-28 03:38:13 · answer #10 · answered by jejenight 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honey, I don't know what's going on in your bf head, but if a guy says 'we need space', it would mean to me he is letting me down gently. If I were you, I'd go out and find myself another man. A real man would be 100% honest, your bf is not a real man, he's just left you hanging. Dump him
2006-09-28 03:36:26 · answer #11 · answered by Ya-sai 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋