I met my ex, an intense relationship followed. She transfered schools and we cared about eachother so much that I moved to be with her. For the next year I had my own place but we spent all of our time together so we moved in. About 6mo after(now 2 yrs into it) she started saying she wasnt sure what she wanted and I kind of agreed because we were young. we wanted to see what else there was but didnt want to leave eachother. I lived there for 6 more mo and we remained best friends the whole time and were dating off and on, includ the next yr with me nearby. We fought when there was suspicion of interest in others. Now being 4 yrs in, being together as best friends, and at many times lovers, spending nearly every day together, I have realized that I still love her deeply, but she does not feel the same. It kills me to think of her with another. I dont want to just go from best friends to nothing but dont know how to get over her. She is hurt that I cant find a way to remain great friends
2006-09-25 20:09:00 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well from what u have said above seems there is not much of a problem, except that ur gf is not commiting herself. Is she having an affair on the side or did u cheat with her some times, the answer may lie here. Also there are times when people enter a relationship and when intimacy develops they realise that it is better to walk away.
A complaint usually falls into one of two broad categories:
1) "You are not meeting my emotional needs," or
2) "Your behavior is upsetting me."
The first category reflects a failure to make your girl happy, and the second category reflects a failure to avoid making your girl unhappy.
When you meet your girls emotional needs, you deposit love units into her Love Bank. And when you avoid behavior that makes your spouse unhappy, you avoid withdrawing love units. That combination leads to romantic love, the feeling of incredible attraction that is essential in a happy and fulfilling relationship. So if your girl ever registers a complaint in either of these two categories, my advice to you is to take care of the problem as quickly as possible. Don't wait for it to become an even greater problem, in hopes that it will eventually go away.
To guarantee your love for each other, you and your girl must address each other's complaints as soon as they arise. Don't let your problems build up before you find solutions, because the longer you wait, the more love units you lose. But, if you're not careful, the way you go about presenting your problem and trying to find solutions can also cause you to lose love units.
Finally brainstorm possible solutions to the problems, looking for a plan that would solve your problem, and at the same time take your girl's feelings into account. Avoid any solution where one of you gains at the other's expense. Don't give or expect sacrifice because that means that one of you will be losing love units so that the other can gain them. If you sacrifice for each other, in the end, you won't have the mutual love for each other that you want. But also recognize the importance of eventually finding a solution that solves the problem. Hope it works for u, if not, then it is best for both to remain as good friends rather then build up bitterness.
2006-09-25 20:31:56 · answer #1 · answered by Rahul 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to try to move on... Maybe move away from where she is recently living and then stop communicating for a while till you know deep down inside that you have no matter feelings for her. Also what you can do is try to occupy yourself with different things, like start a new hobby or hang out more with friends. Thats the only way you can try to forget about her. Sometimes trying to not see the person helps to forget about her/him.
Take care and take it slow.
2006-09-25 20:53:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get away from her and stop all contacts. Knowing she doesn't love you yet she's not letting you go, now that her selfishness. If this relationship continues, only you will get hurt, not her so it's best for you to run now.
Besides, you are not giving yourself a chance to meet someone else and with her at your side every times don't think you will be able to see one. So, just get away from her and if she really cares for you, she will understand what you are undergoing. But she won't coz she's selfish and want to keep you with her no matter what.
Am not here to jugde people, am just telling my thoughts, the rest up to you.
Good luck
2006-09-25 20:25:52 · answer #3 · answered by Saphire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let go of her, that's the best thing u can do if u really love her, set her free!!! Give yourself time to realize and i know u can move on
2006-09-25 20:14:37 · answer #4 · answered by i_love_u 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IT LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE A REASON TO BE HURT ALSO-give yourself a break and don't let it bother you if she is upset because you can't be best friends-I know how you feel you have a right to your feelings also!
2006-09-25 20:15:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a life and move on. like the famous quote from mike niquette.
goin out w/girls is like drinking beers, when ur done w/one ,grab another :)
2006-09-25 20:26:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her alone and move on its hard but sometime its for the best....
2006-09-25 20:19:09 · answer #7 · answered by msdetdiva313 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop contact until your stronger
2006-09-25 20:10:31 · answer #8 · answered by darkangel1111 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump he and ran away no point do that
2006-09-25 20:36:25 · answer #9 · answered by princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋