my bf and i have been on for 14 months and some months ago he asked me the question " what if i were to ask you to marry me right now what would you say? to whch i said no since i was 21 and thought of myself as too young to get married., then he asked me 2 more times the same question to which i lied and said no because i did not want to tell him yes and scare him away and then last night while i was at my bf's place studying i was telling him about some friends of mine &about kids in a couple of years.we have talked about having kids and he does not want that -kids- while i do and it would bring a joy to my life, me more than him since i would not mind being with him.last night he tells me that he knows that i would not want to marry me-sorry to break the bad news since he knows that that is part of what i want. why am i still with him?what should i do? should i call it quits or why cannot he see himself with me-am i not good enough for him? what is he thinking?plz help
2006-09-25 18:55:09 · 3 answers · asked by icycrissy27blue 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it is like he cannot make up his mind after a couple of months so he tells me that we would most likely or never end up getting married. last night i went to bed and cried myself to sleep and told myself that i was okay and barely got any rest and broke down in tears in my history class at 9 am- it was so emberassing! it has taken a big toll on me but its like i cannot tell him!because feel that maybe he does not know what he wants or maybe he never wanted me at all..
2006-09-25 18:59:24 · update #1
Hon, believe me that NO amount of love can prepare you for such different goals in life. Wanting a child is huge. When in young love it feels like our love will solve all problems. It doesn't.
Differences between two people get bigger when married.
You are still young. I would advise to not marry anyone who doesn't share your core needs. You are very much in love with your bf. But love doesn't mean you have to sacfice your life for any guy. Hang in there until you find the right match.
Be confident in yourself. NO man can validate you. You need to be strong on your own before you can be with a man.
Hold your head up strong......you deserve a guy who shares your wants for the future.
2006-09-25 19:05:30 · answer #1 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a player. You need to move on for your own happiness. You both want differant things. If you are eager for kids and know this guy doesn't want any, you are wasting your time. Life is too short to be unhappy. Make it sweet and respct yourself. It is soo worth it.
2006-09-25 22:21:20 · answer #2 · answered by mama mia! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
best be telling him how you feel and if he walks, better now than when its to late for you...find someone who adores you and will be the person you need to be..geez i wish i had someone so in love me they wanted a whole life together...marriage,kids the lot...ive been waiting 10yrs to fid or be found and it will be worth the wait..so get what it is your hearts desires cause you wont be satisfied till you get there trust me...why be with someone who doesnt want or ache for the same,you want to recieve what you give if not more and sounds as if you will never get that with this bloke...sorry but maybe its true...best of luck hope you get what it is you need..a good fella who will love you entirely...
2006-09-25 19:13:50 · answer #3 · answered by waveboy7675 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋