I feel the world left me behind long ago?

Question

Maybe i'm being a bit dramatic but it's how I feel. I'm 24, chunky, wears glasses, feel very ugly. I've been on three dates ever, all with the same girl. Even made out with her. I'm shy and don't feel comfortable talking to new people. New situations terrify me. All in all, rather pathetic. Any advice from anyone on how to improve myself would be welcome.

Answer 1

You need to explore.I know its hard.I'm a shy guy to when it comes to girls...but maybe you can find a girl who is equally as shy as you.And a person who likes you for who you truly are and not appearance.That or go for the girl you know.

Answer 2

I can't even remember being 24 - but I will tell you at 37 I have never felt or looked better - I used to have as much muscle tone as a house plant, and had no confidence to speak of...it's never too late to get on an excercise program, learn a new skill, maybe take up an instrument - just keep exploring until you find a few things you might enjoy - you might find out that you have what it takes to be the best at some obscure activity that you didn't even know exisited - like maybe you are championship curling material - or could be the world's leading expert in ???

I've discovered that I am very damn good at a few things that did not occur to me at 24 - and I'm building a career on skills I did not have until a few years back.

Dates with actual girls will follow...believe me...(if you would have told me - back when I was 24 - that hot women would be chasing me - and that I'd have a relationship as awesome as I do now - I would have never believed you) work on liking yourself first. And don't beat yourself up if overnight change does not come.

Answer 3

I'm not going to tell you some bs about love yourself the way you are. You can change all these things. It will take time but you can see real results in a matter of months.
1) Diet. Some people swear by Atkins diet, but here is what worked for me: No fats. No red meat, nothing fried or sauteed, only steamed or grilled. No butter or margarine. No regular milk, only skim. Be ruthless in following this diet. Fish, chicken and turkey are fine, but remember, nothing fried.. Exceptions to the no-fat rule: fish like salmon, nuts (like almonds, not peanuts), olive oil. The fats in these are good for you. Carbs are fine- bread, pasta, fruits & vegetables. READ FOOD LABELS carefully to make sure there is as little fat as possible.
Don't eat too much at one meal - spread it out into several smaller meals throughout the day, if possible.
2) exercise- aerobic exercise several days a week, better yet, every day. Brisk walking every day is a start, if you can get to a gym, treadmill or stepping machine or rowing machine (my weapon of choice)
You can start slow and work your way up. Be obsessive, like with your diet. Gotta burn calories every day.
3) If you can afford it, get contact lenses. Soft contacts are comfortable for most people. Also look around at other guys. How do they dress? What kind of haircut do they have? Imitate them. One example: looking at other guys I realized that t-shirts are a BAD idea if your waist is wider than your shoulders. I wore open-necked shirts until I lost a significant amount of weight. Now I don't look like a dork when I wear a t-shirt.

You can do it! If you work at it every day it will happen. Oh yeah, if you have a scale, put it away in a closet and only check your weight once a month or so. You'll drive yourself crazy if you check every day. Good luck!

Answer 4

Something I learned a long time ago is that you have to like yourself before others will like you. I'm sure you have some wonderful qualities that you could utilitize into your personality. Above all, always be true to yourself and chances are you will be considered a great guy to be with. There are a lot of single groups around that you could get involved with, remembering that most everyone is, to some degree, shy. Be prepare to listen as well as being able to carry a conversation. I hope something I said will help.

Answer 5

ok this is gonna be hard but will improve you social life, call up your nearest female cousin that's closest to your age and go over to her house. aAsk her to take a good at you and have her tell you what you could do to improve your looks, take her advice as long as it doesn't cost much. Then get out more go to the malls & other places were there are alot of ppl and try to walk as much as possible you never know who you might meet some interesting while your out and about. There are some really great girls out there in the real world and they don't care how ugly you think you look.

Answer 6

Try doing things to broaden your horizons. Take baby steps, try maybe a new class or going places that interest you and you will find people that like the similar things. Don't be too hard on yourself, you're not pathetic, you're shy. You are a late bloomer. You have time to work on yourself and explore. Sooner or later you will meet someone. Just be open to the situation when it arrives. Good luck, I'm rooting for you.

Answer 7

You have to develope some confidence somehow.

I would try to go to stipclubs, if you've got money, the girls won't care.

If you don't have money, then you are screwed that way too.

But confidence is the key.

Answer 8

Have more confidence in yourself. Once you have confidence people (especally women) will notice. Remember: You can't be loved by anyone else unless you love youself.