For example: (I made this up so its not great)
God walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender ignores him. So again he asks, but still, he's being ignored. So finally he shouts at the bartender to get him a drink. Nothing.
Furious, he storms out of the bar, where he runs past Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.
"Why's he so mad?" Inquires the Easter Bunny.
Santa Claus says. "Must have realized he doesn't exist"
Fin.
2006-09-25 15:29:39 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I saw some on here that are pretty funny:
Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of him?
A: It only takes 1 nail to hang the picture.
2006-09-25 15:31:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
I've got a good one... and all the better because it's TRUE.
A priest who was a teacher at a seminary (not a priest of a parish) has a serious crisis of faith. His fellow teachers take him to a golf outing to cheer him up. After an 18 hole round he still can't face going back and wants another round. They tell him to call when he's done and they'd give him a ride back to the school. So, while he's waiting for the golf course to pair him up with a partner he prays.
He prays for grace.
He prays hard for the grace of God to show him, at the age of 60, how he should have lived his life.....
"Please Lord, grant me your grace." he prays.
Just, then a woman walks up and says, "Hi, I guess I'll be playing golf with you today. My name is Grace."
So................He quits the seminary and marries her (of course, getting excommunicated in the process). She's a counselor at a Juvenal Detention Facility and he gets a job there as a chaplain, doing God's work like never before.
Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor?
2006-09-25 22:49:22 · answer #2 · answered by angrygramma 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Life is full of emotions like laughing, smiling, crying, weeping, fear, hatred, jealousy and many more. Out of all these, laughing is loved and liked by all. That is why someone has rightly said, “ You laugh and the world will laugh with u, you weep and you shall weep alone.” Sometimes, life becomes monotonous and one starts getting bored. To remove such monotonousness and boredom, I feel that surfing on the following websites can be helpful in making one cheerful, refreshen up and gain some emotional or psychological energy too. Surf on them and see how helpful these are to you to bring a smile on your face.
http://www.comedycentral.com/jokes/index...
http://www.ahajokes.com/
http://www.the-jokes.com/
http://www.lotsofjokes.com/
http://www.jokesgallery.com/
http://www.workjoke.com/projoke.htm......
http://www.jokes2000.com/
http://yahooligans.yahoo.com/content/jok...
http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/scijokes/...
http://www.kidsjokes.co.uk/
http://www.ahajokes.com/yo_mama_jokes.ht...
http://www.allfunnypages.com/funny-jokes...
http://www.africanjokes.com/africanjokes...
http://www.blonde-jokes.info/
http://www.zelo.com/blonde/index.asp......
http://www.indiabook.com/jokes/entertain...
Please visit the above pages to find different variety of jokes. I hope, it helps you in making you laugh. Enjoy and have fun..
2006-09-26 03:54:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
An angel appears to a guy and tells him that he has only one hour to live. The guy was pretty well off, so naturally this upset him a bit. 'I've got a lot here, and I really don't want to leave it. Can I take a suitcase of my most precious stuff w/ me to heaven?' The angel asks God, who okays it. The man packed a suitcase full of gold. An hour later, the man dies. He arrives at the pearly gate, where he meets St. Peter himself. He proudly hands the suitcase to Peter, smugly telling him about how he struck a deal with God. Peter opens the suitcase and looks at the man quizzically. 'You brought pavement?'
And you're right. Your joke sucked.
2006-09-25 22:38:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Jesus and his apostles are talking a stroll. One of the apostles says "Jesus, it's hot as hell today. Let's go take a swim in that lake over there.
All the apostles jump in the lake but Jesus stays on the shore. The apostles shout, "hey, Jesus, come on in, the water's great."
Jesus says, "well, I don't know."
Finally they convince him. Jesus jumps into the water and starts bouncing across the surface.
P.S. Your joke did NOT suck.
2006-09-25 22:35:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't Step on the Ducks
Three guys die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: Don't step on the ducks!"
So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one.
Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest woman he has ever seen. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to the ugly woman!"
The next day, the second guy steps accidentally on a duck, and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing, and with him is another extemely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first guy.
The thrid guy has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid eyes on: a very tall, tan, curvaceous, sexy blonde. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.
The guy remarks, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?"
She says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"
2006-09-25 22:34:16 · answer #6 · answered by Dragonfly 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Just look around this board a lot of the questions and answers are jokes (even though the writers don't know it).
2006-09-25 22:32:55 · answer #7 · answered by Duncarin 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What meat does the priest eat on Friday??? NUN!
2006-09-25 22:32:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
"Religion" (Global Religious Delusions) - what a joke that is...
2006-09-25 22:36:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are these religious jokes?
2006-09-25 22:31:58 · answer #10 · answered by Marco 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋