I'm thinking about relaxing my daughters hair. Imputs needed please!!?

Question

I have tryed just about every hair product out there and every morning we wake up with the same problem (mounds and mounds of tangles) because her hair is super curly and thick. I've even had to cut a knot out of her hair that was matted so bad. My daughter is of mixed race (African American-white). I have no problems with my eldest daughters hair. I keep hers in braids. But I'm having such a hard time with the thick thick ringlets and I feel maybe she needs a relaxer?? She'll be 6 next month.

Answer 1

wait dont' do it!! she's much too young for a relaxer. I got my first relaxer when i was about that age and it fell out!! You should wait at least until she begins her menstrual cycle (12or 13)(i got this from a hair magazine can't remember which one though). This signals that your daughter's body and her hair is able to withstand the chemical processing of relaxers.

Try this: braids, moisturizing and detangeling shampoos, conditioners (apply conditioner rinse after about 5 minutes then use a leave-in conditioner, using both conditioning methods helps the hair to be more manageable and less kinky), don't use shampoo with conditioner in it, moisturizing hairdress (kinda like lotion for the hair, mizani is the best, its a salon product) ALWAYS use a WIDE TOOTH comb when combing her hair out ( small tooth combs will take her hair out), flat iron chi iron recommended, but conair flat irons are good also, make sure the hair is trimmed regularly

A relaxer should be your last resort, especially b/c she's of mixed race!!! My sister has hair like that and she's 15 with long beautiful hair and has never had a relaxer. My second oldest sister (30) has hair like that also and when she got a relaxer it fell out.

Braids aren't great for every occasion. You may want to flat iron so it will be straight.

Tip: 1. You may want to consult a few different cosmetologist because i've learned from going to several different beauticians alot of them actually don't know much about hair care. Many are focused on styling. Hair care should be your number one priority and then styling. My hairstylist is a man and he has taught me alot about hair care.

Tip: 2 Always let a professional deal with the chemicals never do it yourself. You will pay for the damage later.

Bottom line just don't do it, wait till she's older.

I relax my hair only b/c it's extremely coarse and i only go to a professional

good luck

Answer 2

well if she had one length hair try to do long layer's and see if they can thinen out her curls and if you've done that then ask the salon if they thing a curl definer would be good for her hair it would do less damage and the time is about the same lasting as a relaxer since she's mixed and so small a relaxer is really the last resort for a small mixed girl i think because once she get it one she will have to keep doing it for the rest of her life of else her hair could brake off i use to work in a salon and that's what a lot of the girl's told me.. but lots of people dont' have a problem with that but you might since she's so young right now... best of luck

Answer 3

She's so young, I'd think a long time before starting to use chemicals on hair. Also, that kind of processing can damage her hair.

Isn't there a good hair conditioner for either little girls or else African American hair that might help? Can you do something like tie her hair up for sleeping or set it on sponge curlers or change the style?

Aside from any issues about chemicals on a little child's hair, I would be concerned that if you make too much of an issue with the hair she is born with she could see it as having "bad hair". I think little girls need to be shown how whatever they were born with is good and how to make the most of whatever they were born with. She's so little. Children's spray-on de-tangler doesn't help?

Inconvenient or not, I'd think it would be nice for her to get the message that her thick ringlets are beautiful - because usually thick ringlets are.

Answer 4

Relaxers are great! I do mine all the time; but keep in mind that she's only six, and the psychological ramnifications are serious. In other words, you'll be teaching her that there is a great importance in they way you look and your hair. C'mon, she's only six! Read up on ways to handle the knots, talk to other mothers, I'm sure they'll have a lot of pointers.

Taking the next step of chemically enhancing her hair is someone that should be done if and when she's ready, not because it makes the knots go away. She is at a fragile psychological stage that everything you show her, she learns quickly, deep inside her psyche. Slow your roll with the beauty-complex.

Answer 5

I have had a similiar problem with my hair for a very long time. I tried everything to straighten it, and even had it straightened professionally. My hairstylist said the only way to get your hair permanently straight is to go to a place that specialized in African-American hair (now most of the gentle relaxers can be used on all types of hair without frying it).
I made another discovery, my hairstylist told me my hair was too damaged to keep all the length on it, so I said that he could cut the damage out. My hair is now at my shoulders and I have less tangles and better looking hair than I've had in years. It's possible your daughters hair might just need to have some of the weight and damage cut out.
I also made another discovery with this hairdresser. After he cut my hair, he straightened it with a straightening iron that I was so impressed with, I bought. The name of this iron is Babybliss Pro (mine is 1/2 " width), and it works so well, I can straighten my hair in less than 15 mins.
Good Luck!

Answer 6

i really recomed that you go get your daughter a really nice cut. depending on how many times she has had a haircut, the ends of hair continue to split up resulting in damaged, dry, brittle, tangled hair. If she still has her baby hair on her ends, that is no good hair. it is old and damaged, therefor, needs to be taken off. you may want to consider some layering, very long layers that way she dosn't bush out, and it will lay really nice. as for the relaxer, you can use a mild one on her, only to help redirect the curls, not necessarly getting rid of them, but reforming them to be more manageable. you probably will need to only do this a few times a year to help it be more manageable. also, make sure you use a seperate shampoo and conditioner for her. the shampoo is not doing its job if its mixed with conditioner. have you ever seen a 2 in 1 at a salon?

Answer 7

Quickly, go to a book store and buy the book "Curly girl" by Lorraine Massey.
Your daughter does not need to have her relaxed, but needs to be treated differently and has special care needs. The book will make both of your lives easier, it has all the answers.
Do not relax her perfect virgin hair.

Answer 8

holy crap.. a harsh chemical on a 6 year old??
the smart thing to do is go to a stylist, get maybe a shorter cut that is manageable. also have her sleep in loose braids maybe even with a silky scarf wrapped around her hair.

and for the love of her head... if you decide you NEED a relaxer, go to a PROFESSIONAL so you dont burn your childs scalp off.

Answer 9

braid her hair as well, relaxers should be done at 12 or 13 yrs. its costly as well.

Answer 10

i would go to a salon and ask i sure they could help u out alot... just make sure u ask lots of question cuz some might just say yes for the money