im nervous and butterflies in my stomach. what to do??
2006-09-25 12:14:11 · 19 answers · asked by sexylovesexyqueen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think everyone feels nervous before getting married. It's like a tradition or something...lol. If this guy is someone you love, someone you can picture yourself with for the rest of your lives, then relax and remember that you love him, and this is something you want to do. I'm sure everything will be just fine. Oh, and congrats.
2006-09-25 15:09:45 · answer #1 · answered by GRR 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋
Don't marry for the financial reward it will never work. To know if you really love someone try and imagine waking up next to that person when you are both old,wrinkled,have bad back's corns on your feet and really bad flatulence, if you can see this and still recon you would love him then give him the answer you both want. the fact that you have nerves and butterflies is a good response as you have probably thought about this situation all ready and are mature enough to think it through before answering him, also talk to family as they most of the time will have your best interest at heart ask them to be totally honest with you as to what they really think of this person being your future life long partner as this is what getting married is all about,
remember also that if there are any serious doubts that divorce is the worst thing that can happen as everyone suffers tremendously not just you it will affect your whole family and it will cost you some Friends, so once again think this through very carefully and remember to talk to DADDY HE DON'T WANT HIS ANGEL GETTING HURT OK.
hope this has helped best of luck.
2006-09-25 20:56:21 · answer #2 · answered by TrOpPo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't have any experience with long-term relationships, but it seems to me that the material stuff you mentioned is just an "icing-on-the-cake" situation. It's great your man has a good job and steady income. But how you feel about him and how he treats you is paramount. How long have you been dating? How old are you? Do you have any career aspirations that marriage may impede? If you are young or still in school, wait. I've seen many of my friends get hitched at 21, 22, 23 years of age, and then they hit a rift with their partner. The honeymoon ends quickly.
Be sure to live you're life the way YOU want to. If you get married too soon and deny yourself a chance to explore your own interests, you could live with regret. And you may end up resenting your guy friend. Just a word of caution, there. However, only you can answer the big "love" question. If you truly love him, and he you, then you will find a way to make it work. Just go into it with eyes wide open. Good luck!
2006-09-25 19:23:21 · answer #3 · answered by atomicfrog81 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've been married 14 yrs and counting, NOTHING is perfect, there are times I look at my husband i'm like what a butthead BUT I still love him. MONEY isn't everything, the first 2 things you mentioned are material items.
Ask yourself these simple questions
1.) IF he was a manager of a McDonalds or Wendys would I still want to be with him ?
2.) If he drove a pinto would I still want to be with him
IF you answered NO to those, then you don't need to get married.
I was nervous when I got married to, it's natural. It's a huge step and I will tell you now, its a constant project you have to tend to, it doesnt just grow on it's own.
GOOD LUCK
2006-09-25 19:54:04 · answer #4 · answered by wilowdreams 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK, first off, you don't say anything about loving him or about your relationship - you only mention material things (car, job). If that's all there is between you, then there's a BIG reason you're having doubts. If you already have plans to marry him, put them on hold or at least take some time to seriously think about this. If not (ie. if he's just asked you), then put it off for now. This should feel like the right decision - you shouldn't wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat wondering if you're doing the right thing.
2006-09-25 19:21:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It could be your intution telling you that there is something you fear about this relationship with him. The best way to get to the cause of your nervousness is to make a list of things you love about him and on the other side of the paper, things that you dislike or it bothers you about him. You might feel you are settling for him when you could do better.
After you look at the lists, look at your reasons you love him..if the majority of your list is personailty, good job, nice car, similar interests, sense of humor instead of charcter traits such as honesty, thoughtfulness, considerate, sensitivity, loyality, respectful, maturity etc than that is a sign he is not right for you.
Same with things you dislike about him..if it's made up with negative stuff such as gambling, drinking, drugs, dishonesty, poor communication and listing skills, insenstivity, cheating, not respectful to you ie talks down to you, selfish, etc.
2006-09-25 19:51:06 · answer #6 · answered by xanadu88 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Trust your gut. I was engaged to be married and felt unsettled about it too - I called it off but had already paid for much of the wedding and I lost a lot of money - but I am very happy I didn't marry him - I am now married to the man of my dreams and I wasn't nervous AT ALL on our wedding day.
2006-09-25 19:47:22 · answer #7 · answered by family_matters 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Based on the order of the words you used to describe this man, I say you all should not get married. Are you really in love with him or did you just like the life that marrying him might bring you?
2006-09-25 20:31:59 · answer #8 · answered by Charlee's Mama 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think it's natural to feel nervous to be getting married. It's a life-time commitment. We are saying that we are forsaking others just for our future husband. It's quite scary when one starts to think about it. I had jitters a month ago and started questioning our relationship and him. My future husband has a great job and nice personality as well. I asked myself if i'm ready for him and for marriage and whether it may work or not. then i reaslied that i love him and want to spend the rest of my life with him, so i slowly work out my fears. I still do have fears but i know that he would be there for me.
I guess that you have asked yourself questions - do you want to spend the rest of your life with him? Do you love him enough? Or just want to be with him for his material goods?
2006-09-25 21:39:52 · answer #9 · answered by autumn lover 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Laugh! Get your friends and just laugh!
Instead of worrying about how it's going to go, are you making the right decision, what's going to go wrong...laugh! Enjoy yourself!
Go out with your friends, grab a bite to eat, and just laugh.
I'm getting married in 2 weeks, and although I'm used to being on stage, I HATE being the center of attention. You know what? My friends are great at making me laugh. The more I laugh, the better I feel.
Or just go out for a long walk. Get those endorphines going! You're going to be great.
2006-09-25 19:46:50 · answer #10 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋