help i'm very depressed?

Question

my wife and i have been apart for a year now.so to be divorced.i can't think of a life without her.i told her how i feel but she says its over.what can i do.people say i'm a great guy and nice looking and that i'll meet someone else but i love her and don't want my kids to think it's allright to divorce someone and work it out.i'm suicidal but i love the kids but the pain is still there maybe even more.don't tell me to ask god or leave.my kids need me and i want to try to raise them to have morals unlike there mom.help!!

i can't see myself ever being in love with someone ever again.also she has a restraing order against me because i can't accept the fact that she doesn't love me that way any more.and ask her to save our family.

Answer 1

ive been there, i mean exactly 100 % same as you, i tried suicide, i failed and ended up in the hospital for an evaluation, well after a few hours of being in there i wanted to go home, but i also made an appointment with my doctor, and he suggested that i go on ant-depressants, ive never been into pills for curing depression, but in about 2 days i was feeling better, still missing her, but not suicidal, as a matter of fact, i was able to think better, and after a few weeks i had my life under control, and i was also talking with a coucilor a few times a week, and eventually started datind again, and when my wife saw how well i was doing with out her, she was begging for another chance, but right now the best thing you can do is to stay with friends, you cant be in a house full of memories, until you are more stablestay with freinds, and stay busy,and what ever you do do not pest your wife tp please come back, she left and said its over, that just means she wants space, let her have that space, she might change her mindbut it does take a few weeks to start feelin better, but suicidal thoughts need to be treated right away,you were fine before you met her, so you will be fine after her, just takes timebut please see a doctor, and start the anti-depressants right away, trust me they do work.

Answer 2

First, Take a deep breath and exhale. Second, love hurts sometimes and you cannot make someone love you no matter how hard you try. Unfortunately you have to let her go, but still be there for your children. keep them as the most important people and do everything that you can for them. Forget about the ex. She will find out the old saying that what goes around, comes around like bad karma. If you commit suicide(which is never a good option), think about what that will do to your children, not to mention what your soon to be ex wife will tell them as to why daddy passed away. Do some soul searching and remember that there are at least 3 women in this world, to every one man, so your chances of finding a good one are high. And although you don't want to hear about asking god for help, he is the one to turn too in time like this and if you were not seeking his help, you would not have posted this int he religious and spirituality section.

Answer 3

Sometimes the best remedy is to distance yourself from her for a while. Try doing things to take your mind off her. Perhaps, if you are trying too hard, then she is feeling smothered.
You mentioned she doesn't have morals. Why would you want to be around her if that was the case? I understand you wanting to be around for you children. I think that is the case for every dad.
I don't think you will find the answer here. You should talk to a friend, or your doctor.
I was faced with this situation many years ago. Once I realized it was hopeless, I became indifferent toward her. It was actually then when she realized that she missed me, and we worked it out.
Good luck, and forget about the suicide thing. Think about your kids.

Answer 4

Here are some hard truths you have to live with. There is no such thing as a one sided marriage. You can't make someone love you because that's what you want. No one can take away the love you hold in your heart. If you truly do love your wife you must let her go. You have a responsibility to your children forever. It is up to you to make sure they know that you love them. They will need you more than ever in a divorce situation. You can't just quit (commit suicide) on your kids, they need a dad.. I am sorry for your situation I wouldn't want this to happen to anyone. Do all you can to make sure your children are cared for in every way. Don't do crazy things that will end you up in trouble and away from them... If you need someone to talk to email me... Jim

Answer 5

If u believe in God and going toheaven or hgell then i wan tot tell u that God never forgive the ones that kill htemselves bcuz u on't have a cahnce to say sorry and for God to forgive u. You'll be dead by then. And i know i can't say that i know whwat ur going through cuz im only 16 but all i ahve to say is that killing ureslf wouldn't do anything for ur kids either. You'll be leaving htem without a father. And every kids needs both parents even if they are divorced. I know i may not be helping but even though i don't know u., i would hate to hear that u kiled urself. Things like this are important to me. I don't want u to die. Please rethink what ure doing. Do u want ur kids to know when they are older that u had no choice excpet to kill ur self? Whats if one of ur kids are going through the same probelm and one day relizes that u did the same thing, then they will say "oh my dad did hte same soi'll do it too. There is no probelm if my dad did it"

I know u really like that gilr alot but that is no reaosn to kill ur self. And staying with them will let u be the best person in eir life morre than their mother. They will gorw to realize that u relaly cared aboutbthem adn that their mother didn't mind adn just left htem. I know its kinds sad to say but u are the one in their lives. They need u. They will grow up thining that it was thier fault. Just don't do it. If u really need help, please just seek God. He is really really really hte only one that can help someone goign through stuff like this. If u give up on God if hu think He's taking to long, God will not help u. U need to trust in God and let Him take His time and do what He has to do with u. He ahs a plan for eveyone. Killing urself would ruin His plan. He loves u and wouldn't agree with u muredering urself. Thats what it is in God's eyes. And u cna't ask for forgivness when ure dead sso u'll be goign to Hell.

Please just rethink what u want to do to urself. Please, for the sake of ur children.

Answer 6

Your wife will always be a part of your life because she is the mother of your children. The only way marriage works is if you both communicate with each other, not at each other or through the kids but to each other. Please contact a suicide hotline ASAP. Your children need you in their lives. Parents committing suicide is devastating to their children and has life time consequences for them. Please seek counseling - You are important. You are needed. You are loved - parents, friends, siblings, co workers, your family. You can't "fix" your wife but you can get help for yourself and be a good example for your kids. Blessings to you.

Answer 7

Lifes like that sometimes. Your going to have to grin and bare it and get on with your life. Spend as much time as possible with your family. Visit parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc., as much as possible and don't be afraid to vent around them. When you don't have your children then get out and do the things that you weren't able to do when you were married. Rent YOUR kind of movies, take up writing in a journal to record your progress through this. If your able, see a councelor. Good Luck.

Answer 8

The best thing I can think of is to pray (sorry if thats "asking God" but it will help) and having fellowship. Try to explain to your kids about whats going on without details that could hurt them. I don't know how old they are, but I would suggest teaching them that divorce is not the answer, and that you do not support it. I would suggest for you to avoid divorce at all costs. I dont know the details, but no matter what it is, God can heal.

Answer 9

Order this book, it's a great start to help change some of the basic reasons you are now faced with this problem.
Loving Life By Craig Biddle

Answer 10

If you are suicidal you need help, whatever the issues. You are a person separate from your wife and children. If you do not get help for yourself you can not help your children.