Should I tell him that I cheated and how?

Question

I swore that i would never do such a terrible thing such as cheating on someone you care about. However this past weekend, I had sex with this guy that i formally talked to but don't have any feelings towards him, I was intoxicated and i was wanting some, and i know that sounds terribly hoeish. I'm freaking out though now cause i dont wanna go on lying to him but im so afraid. WE have only been going out for a little more than a month but we have grown pretty close. Please give me your input, and please dont be to cruel for what i did cause trust me, its killing me inside. Thank You !

Answer 1

I'm going to say no. don't tell himm. omg this is so weirdd..lol--i'm going through the same thing right now..like..the same exact thing..i have a question in yahoo answers about it too.. if you wanna check out some of the answers i got. i decided on not telling him. i guess it depends on your situation.. good luck though!!

love always-- summer hampton*

Answer 2

If I were you, I would tell him now. Don't wait for him to find out later or for it to build up so much guilt you explode a few months down the road. There is always the chance that he will break up with you, but if you explain what really happened then maybe he won't. Yeah, he will be a little hurt, and he might not trust you as much for awhile, but he will lose all trust in you if you don't tell him and he finds out, and trust me...he will find out somehow. If you are as close as you say you are, he will realize it was an honest mistake and give you a second chance, but if he does give you another chance, don't do it again. If you want to drink take him with you so you know it would be him you did anything with if something happened. Good luck....sorry if I didn't help any.

Answer 3

I don't know- if you've only been dating for 30 days, are you exclusive? Have you made a commitment to each other? Personally, I don't believe in making a commitment to a person in less than a month, so I don't know if I'd call it cheating. He's not your boyfriend, you're not engaged, and he's not your husband. So is it cheating?
I'm totally against cheating in any way/shape/form but in your case, I'm not sure if I'd classify it as such. I think you made a mistake and feel bad about it. I think you should remember this the next time you go out drinking and are tempted to hook up-- it wasn't worth it, was it?
I probably wouldn't mention it to him, only because you've been dating for just 30 days and haven't decided to be exlcusive. I think you need to forgive yourself, and vow not to behave that way again-- for your own sense of self-respect if nothing else.

Answer 4

you have to tell him. even though you have only being together for a little while you guys are suppossed to be in a committed relationship, but you tecnically broke the rules. I am not trying to be rude i went through the same thing except i am married, trust me if the guy cares about you he should be able to forgive and forget, but dont think it is not going to be hard,because the hardest thing to do is tell someone you cheated but it will get better i promise. but you wont feel any better if you dont tell him

Answer 5

YES tll hm. What hppns in darkness always come to light and you do not wnt him fndng out when things r gng really good. Be honest with him now so he knows that you didn't have to tell him you CHOOSE to tell him. He will respect u more for that and it will be easier for him to trust u again. Everyone makes mstks. Maybe when u r honest he may be hnst with u. Plus u flng that way will eventually cause prblms in the rltnshp anyway.

Answer 6

I would tell him. Advice on how there is no easy way other than just come out and say it. He may break up with you but, that's the price you will have to pay. Think if it was the other way around wouldn't you want to know. Being drunk isn't a good excuse would you take that for a reason from him. i hope he forgives. good luck

Answer 7

Yes, I think you should and that you should accept the consequences that are coming to you. You chose the action, so now step up and accept the consequences. I hope that you and he find a way to work it out if that is what you want, if not then move on and learn from this. But be big enough to do the right thing.

Answer 8

Yes. Tell him how, and why. And you've pretty much lost the man you love, so I'm not gonna sugarcoat it and say things are just fine and peachy if you tell him. But you'll feel better inside. And then the most important part: don't do it again.

Answer 9

Only a month? Do you have a one to one only committment? If you don't or it isn't spoke just implied you don't have to feel quilty.
If he wants one he has to come out and say it. Don't tell unless he asks, you don't want to lie. If he asks why you didn't tell him, say I didn't know we had a formal committment. Relationships are different these days dating for months doesn't seem to mean anything, unless both parties actually say they want to see only each other. Otherwise there is no need to be faithful, it is an open relationship.

Answer 10

Think f how hell feel when you tell him. Now think of how hell fell if someone else tells him. Youre much better off saying it yourself. You need to give him the same reasons that you gave us and if he doesnt listen to you thats his problem. Owing up to it is all you can do .Its his decision from there.

Answer 11

Bake him a cake and spell it out on the top with icing......might as well.....at least it'll be funny. you have 2 options.....hide it and let it eat you away on the inside and risk him finding out on his own....like for instance......having him chance upon your profile on yahoo answers. i'm pretty sure that no matter how long it takes for him to find out it's going to be a hell of a lot worse if you don't talk to him about it.....he's going to be hella pissed of either way...sometimes it's just better to bite the bullet and by confessing.