How do you let your feelings for your ex of four years and two kids later go?

Answer 1

Its really hard at first. I was with my ex for 12 years, 1 child. I was so devastated when it first happened. I thought the world was going to end. My life as I new it was going to be totally different and I was so scared to be alone.

After a while, I started to chat with people on line, go out, trying to have fun. At first I was hearing it, and I would just sulk. After a while It became easier and easier to talk to people. I started to see a whole new world. I found out things about myself that I did not know before. I started to keep an open mind and not look for somebody who was just like my ex. (which was what I was doing at first).

You may come to realize that you thought you were a lot happier before then you really were. I have found a new man, who is great and I could not be happier. But you have to give yourself time to heal, get over the past for the most part before you can start something new. Its not only about finding somebody new, but finding a new you.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Over time it will go away, but if he is going to be in the kids lives, you will have to deal with seeing him. Alot depends on the reason you two split up. I have a friend who's been divorced from the father of her two kids (who are grown) and she always had feelings for him, but took it out on the kids, made him look bad. So whatever your feelings are for him, remember he is the father of those two kids, always will be. Do your best to remain friends and exhibit a healthy attitude towards him for your kids to see. Nowdays, kids end up in the middle,used as pawns, and they are the ones that pay for it in the end.

However, if he was abusive to you and/or the kids, the best thing you did was to get out of the relationship. Get some professional help for all of you.

Just remember, your children too, are going through alot because Daddy isn't there anymore....As an adult, we don't think or see that our children are suffering also, thinking it was something they did and they are the reason for daddy leaving....it is soooooooooooo important they know they are not at fault.

Be strong, get some counseling and give your kids alot of love, attention and understanding. Before you know it, those feelings for him will be gone! Good Luck and remember you are not alone.

Answer 3

That is a hard question. I am in the same boat. We now live in separate states, but it hasn't made it any easier - especially when my oldest looks and acts just like him.

It also depends on the reason. He lied and cheated. The situation was bad for me and the stress nearly cost me to go into premature labor twice with my youngest child. I have forgiven, but I will never forget. I still love him - he is my kids dad and will be in our lives forever.

We just have to try and deal with it - but it is easier said than done.

Answer 4

time heals all wounds and maybe that doesn't apply to deaths.Having to move on is kinda like losing someone in a way and it is hard but try a little happy get me up music and don't think about it all the time,you know you did it for a reason,let that reason be your quide for a while.good luck.