The guy that I've been seeing for over a year has just recently moved back home to be with his family. We had a great relationship, but never really had that serious talk. Although, on 2 occasions, he asked me where I bought my rings from, would that be leading up to something that might come? I think he might have thought that I was a superficial person, like money impressed me, by the things I wear, or the car I drive. The day that he left, he told me that I dressed nice & took good care of myself, & I told him that's just because I like fashion. He asked me if my parents had alot of money I guess just to see what my family's like, & how important money is to them. But I told them they aren't flashy by any means, but that they are down to earth. He then told me his parents don't make much & have never even been on an airplane before, I said, well as long as their happy it shouldn't matter. I think the underlying issue here is money, and I believe he moved away also to get himself financially stable since he's living back w/his parents (he's 32). And get this the day he left, I had just come from work & of all things I was wearing my chanel shoes (the only pair I have but they are nice for work) so go figure, but I really want to show him or tell him that money doesn't mean a thing to me as long as I have him. Will he believe me? If he set out to move back in with his parents, he obviously wants to start saving money. He said he still wants to keep in touch, & if I ever need someone to talk to that I can call him. If he really does love me & see's a future with me, did he do the right thing by moving away to get financially responsible? I just hope I didn't run him away because all along he thought I was superficial, I didn't think it bothered him though! But it might have, so I'm wondering if only time will tell for a potential future w/him?
2006-09-25 05:16:59 · 17 answers · asked by feisty 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
SORRY I didn't realize it was so long!
2006-09-25 05:17:35 · update #1
Thats ok that it is long. You had to tell your story. It is a good thing that he is thinkin about gettin himself financially stable. You need to talk to him and tell him how you feel. You need to tell him what you told us here. That you want to continue the relationship and be there for him. You guys are old enough to know how you feel. He might be scared, sometimes men are scared of strong women, but that's where you need to talk to him and let him know your true feelings. That is the only way this is gonna work. He has to know, he probably assuming or something which is not always great for a man to do :) Sit down and talk to him about everything. Good luck.
2006-09-25 05:22:41 · answer #1 · answered by ConfusedK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was he living with you at first, where was he staying before he decided to move back home?
If he is 32 years old and has to move back in with mom and dad, there is something else going on there.
Don't sell yourself short. I know that money isn't a real big issue when it comes to love. But a man with no ambition in life, running home to mom and dad, is not going to make a very good partner in the future.
If I were you, I would go out and find a real man!
2006-09-25 05:30:11 · answer #2 · answered by jenn j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you like nice things and can buy them yourself thats what you tell him if he's all caught up in that than maybe it's a self esteem issue I think it's great that you can afford Chanel shoes I have four kids so I can't but I love my coach bags it's ok to love nice things and it's ok to have money too I hope he is thinking of the future too it would be a very nice thing however if you feel you have to apologize for your love of nice things perhaps he's not the one I am just saying you are who you are if that makes him uncomfortable than it's never gonna work.
2006-09-25 05:25:23 · answer #3 · answered by Katlynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may have intimidated him a little bit with your taste. If he cares about you and wants to have a future with you, then maybe hes a little in fear that he wont be able to support you the way you are accustomed. This is an issue I would have assumed come up within the year you had been together and Im wondering why it hadnt.
Keep in touch with him and continue to let him know, if he asks, that money is not your priority.
2006-09-25 05:21:35 · answer #4 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are reading in between the lines too much, but he is not the right one for you, so just start looking. This man is not for you. You like high fashion, and he is intimidated by you. Just find someone else. If he has a chip on his shoulder now, then it will only get worse later. It will probably never come off, and he will be resenting you forever.
2006-09-25 05:24:39 · answer #5 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he sees you up on a pedestal... above himself, financially.
It apparently does bother him & makes him feel uncomfortable.
I like nice things too, but it's not the most important thinhgs in my life either.
Sounds like you both need to discuss your most important needs, hopes & dreams with one another... maybe then he'll see that you're really a down-to-earth person, & he would feel comforted.
I wish you oceans of assurance... not only will time tell you, but a little extra-special effort can also tell you the answer.
2006-09-25 05:31:16 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a little vain for you to believe that he went away just to come back more successful just for you. Money shouldn't be an issue in matters of the heart. Stop obsessing about it and just focus on getting to know the real you (you aren't what you wear, who are you REALLY on the inside?)and then getting to know the real him.
2006-09-25 05:23:04 · answer #7 · answered by mimi22 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lolololol
2016-03-27 08:59:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is getting inferiority complex and feeling u r too rich and flashy for his lifestyle. Talk to him and clear out these apprehensions if he has them. And next time, pls be careful to wear normal stuff while meeting him.
2006-09-25 05:21:43 · answer #9 · answered by cuteteddy761 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes-only time will tell! It seems to me that if he left you to go back to his parents at the age of 32, you may want to re-evaluate this relationship.
2006-09-25 05:24:21 · answer #10 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋