my dads depression is making me depressed. what can I do to help?

Question

hes always quiet. and when I ask him if he wants to something, he either ignors me or yells at me. I want to spend time with him but he just wants to be alone. It just breaks my heart to go through that. I think its because of the medication hes on for his convulsions. my mom does'nt help much either shes always telling him off. I just want things to be normal. I want to look forward to going home after work and everything is calm, instead of walking into war zone.

Thanks for reading.
Juan.

Im glad to see that people are offering their honest suddgestions, People do still care and listen to others problems.

I personaly thank you all.

God bless

Juan.

Answer 1

Pills and booze.

Answer 2

Your dad sounds like he is really going through a tough time and has responded by withdrawing. If he is in fact depressed, he is probably quite consumed with his thoughts and feelings to the point that he can't be available for you as he might like, nor is he able to make use of your companionship and willingness to help. If he is aware that he's alienating the family, he might also feel guilty about his behavior, which adds to the difficulty. Has he been diagnosed with depression formally by a physician? Is the behavior that you're seeing a change from the way he used to behave,and have other family members observed what you have? Depression can definitely disrupt the functioning of families, and family members might misinterpet the symptoms.

You are right that some medications and medical conditions can lead to depressed mood. His neurologist might not be aware that he is also dealing with a low mood, and it's important that the doctor knows this in case there is something that can be done in terms of medical treatment, and also so that he can suggest a psychologist that your dad can talk to. If depression's present, he may well benefit from medication, but the opportunity to talk with someone confidentially about his feelings and difficulties is the most important thing. Encourage your dad to return to the doctor, and perhaps offer to go with him. This may take some time. It can be hard for people (especially males) to seek help in situations like this, but he does not need to suffer alone. I think that it would also be worthwhile for you to find a counsellor or someone that you can talk to about the stress that you're experiencing. Encourage your mom to find supports as well. It seems to be taking quite a toll on you, and you might find it helpful in terms of your own coping while things get sorted out. Find out all that you can about supporting a depressed family member, and share it with your mom. Having this information can really help.

Hope that things get better. Take care.

Answer 3

I am so sorry to read about your plight. Speak to the nurse or social worker at school and ask for information as to where you can go for help for yourself and your dad. You should be able to call the number of your local Health department for mental health issues. I have to believe that there is an adult in your school or community that can help.

Clearly you are an intelligent young man to be able to see the problem and ask about it.

I truly hope and pray that you will get the help you seek. I feel so helpless but hopefully someone else on Yahoo will have a better solution than I do.

Answer 4

I feel for you and your situation. I am not sure what to say that will help you feel better, though I wish I could. I can share what I know of this sort of dysfunction.
Married people sometimes get all wrapped up in themselves and become self-absorbed. They make everything all about themselves, and forget to actively fulfill each other. They can no longer see beyond their own feelings, their own views, and their own perceptions. Think of it like wearing blinders....
When parents are having problems with each other, they tend to neglect their children's emotional needs. They 'forget' about being a soft place to fall for their children. They do not seem to realize how their issues effect their children. In their own selfish behavior, they hurt their children's feelings and destroy their children's feeling of security, trust and acceptance.
The greatest gift parents can give their children is a healthy and loving partnership and a united front. That means that they have to put the needs of their children before their own needs (to be "right", to be justified, and to be the victim of the other spouse's "wrongs").
I am not sure how to help you deal with this, but maybe you could find the courage to tell them that while they are so busy fighting and criticizing each other, you are suffering and in need of their support. It would be totally understandable if you don't have the courage to discuss it with them, since kids lack the language skills of adults, and they are at the bottom of the pecking order.
Some family counseling would help you all learn how to talk to eah other, and some individual counseling would help you keep thing in perspective and handle your family situation.
Maybe you should tell them that you wish to speak to a psychologist about an anxiety issue. You really need to speak to someone who is objective and has your interest in mind (unlike your parents-but don't tell them that part).
Take care!

Answer 5

Being with mentally sick human beings somewhat intense melancholy will make anybody sick themselves. i have lengthy suggested in case you position a mentally nicely man or woman in a psychological ward they're going to be sick in 2 weeks time. You and your sis favor to flee from this and your mum also needs help herself. the three of you could not proceed no longer eating for particular. Get her money so that you'll get worry-free to make ingredients like microwave nutrients. Get some fruit to boot and fruit juices. Milk and yogurts are large and mum would comply with devour them. Please evaluate calling social facilities at the moment or the social paintings emergency variety and tell them what you shared right here. you receives help and no count number what takes position you probably did what changed into suitable for all 3 of you sturdy success

Answer 6

Just be supportive of what he's going through and understand if he needs to be alone. Constantly remind him that you're there for him when he needs you or needs help. Tell him the truth that y ou want to spend time with him when he's ready. Tell your mom that it's not helping the situation that she's "telling him off". They need to seek mariage counseling if their fights are frequent. You might need to talk to a school psychologists as well if it gets too overwhelming or talk to a good fried about it who understand your problem.

Answer 7

If you try some of the suggestions here and nothing is working, you should be prepared to remove yourself from the situation. Sometimes you just can't help the people you love, and you have to take care of your own sanity. Good luck.

Answer 8

Definitely thats a very depressing situation.

I would suggest sit down with your DAD, dont say anything, just let him be the first to greet you.

When he is watching TV, sit down with him and dont talk.

Let him opne up and you will just be fine.

Make him feel you are willing to listen.

If your dad is forty years old above he maybe experiencing a Mid Life Crisis. Just make him fell he is important and show more patience, and everything will just Be fine.

Answer 9

You should encourage your mother to get everyone into family counseling. If you don't get a response from your mom, there are people at your school who can probably help. The school guidance counselor is supposed to be trained to assist kids and their problems.

Answer 10

Sorry Juan for your sorrow. Just continue to let them know you love them. what they decide is their choice. Use it as a lession learned not to do your children this way. Its not your fault this world is so hard and unstable but you have to make the best of what you have now.Just dont let it get you to depressed find things to take it off your mind. Good luck.

Answer 11

I am sorry, these kind of problems can't b cured. Give your dad best treatment available and counsel your mom. Try to adjust yourself. If nothing works, you have to stay away from home or you will also get depressed. Clinical depression runs in families. You may be predisposed to depression.