my boy friend was with a girl for 5 years they lived togeather and every thing they even though they had a kid together but she cheated on him.. he told me that he still thinks about her everyday and that he still loves her and her little girl the girl still goes to his older sisters house. then he told me that they would never get back together that he does not want to be with her all they do is get a long then fight should i trust him or not? i think about it EVERYDAY
2006-09-25 02:48:52 · 13 answers · asked by britt 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Trust that he won't cheat on you...but do you really want to play second best to someone? You've got to bring it up because it's not fair on you!
2006-09-25 02:51:12 · answer #1 · answered by xx_lush_xx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it bothers you this much, then I would say that you have a trust issue. Either find a way to accept the situation or move on with your life. The child cannot help her circumstances, so you should not punish/hurt her for the parent's issues by forcing your bf from her life. The thing that sticks out to me is that he is honest with you about his feelings. It is possible to care for someone and not be with them. I am in that situation now. But loving someone and being able to coexist in a relationship is totally different. Just remember that the bf chooses to be with you. That should answer your questions. If he is honest enough to tell you how he feels, I believe he would also be honest enough to tell you that he wanted to be with her if that was what he wanted. Allow yourself to trust and the rest will take care of itself.
2006-09-25 10:00:50 · answer #2 · answered by ncmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend will always have feelings and a bond with this other woman being that they had a child together. Only you can answer this question since your the one who knows him. If he is faithful to you and you know it, then trust him. There are so many relationships out there where there is a child involved that does not biologically belong to one or the other persons in the relationship and these relationships do work out. Go with your heart and realize if you stick with this one, these other two people will always be in your lives.
2006-09-25 09:54:20 · answer #3 · answered by gel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing for you to do is slow down your relationship a little until he gets a handle on his feelings for his ex. He cannot use you to get over her, because that is not fair to you. You don't have to stop seeing him if you don't want to, but I would limit your contact with him for a while. If he goes back to her or to another girl, you know that he was not really into you. The way that you are with him now is not healthy for you because he is still living off feelings for his ex girlfriend and not putting everything into you. You are where his focus should be.
Good luck
2006-09-25 09:57:08 · answer #4 · answered by writeroftheyear1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi...i know what you are feeling....My ex boyfriend was married for 4 years, before they get married they were already living together.....they stayed together for 10 years! When we were together he told me that he still love her.....but he didn't wanted to be with her anymore because she cheated on him....he moved country...so there was no how he cheat me with her...but....he didn't loved me...he still thinks about her everyday....i love him alot until now.....but i wasn't fair on me....so after an year and a half together i decided to break up......because love...you pay with love( that's what we say in portuguese...) if i gave him my love...i expected to receive love too. If he can't forget her...his heart won't have place for anyone else but her.......I know what i'm talking about....in the beggind it was very hard for me to be without him...but i survived....and you'll survive too. You have the right to be loved too....i'm still in love with him...but i try to live my life....i go out, i have friends....i'm dating a guy......life goes on....
2006-09-25 10:02:13 · answer #5 · answered by Bella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either trust him and live with the fact you are not as good as her or move on and find someone who will put you on a pedestal. Unless of course you are 2nd best in which case stick with him there might not be another along in a hurry who want someone as insecure and pathetic.
2006-09-25 09:53:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'd better move on. He's told you he still loves the woman and the girl; what more do you need to know he's not interested in you? Let him go, honey! You're just asking for hurt and trouble. Godloveya.
2006-09-25 09:54:10 · answer #7 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs time to grieve, and figure out where he stands. Be careful not to be the shoulder he can lean on until he is ready to move on for a new relationship.
Anyway, if they have a kid together, they will have to keep in touch one way or another.
2006-09-25 09:52:42 · answer #8 · answered by tiger_the_prince 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he did not cheat on his x i doubt that he will cheat on u. those r the type of men that only keep one woman.
2006-09-25 09:56:15 · answer #9 · answered by nick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dear, talk to him, as communication opens up thoughts and from there u can better understand each other needs. he has to choose 2. what u need is a husband and do ask if he has what it takes to be so. best wishes.
2006-09-25 10:04:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋