I explained to him the only affair I had was for 22 years and it never started out as friend ship and i explained to him i want to learn and that he told me I call to much but I am s o used to calling with my other realationship I asked him to give me a chance how do I change and try to make this work I realy like him. he said he want a submissive woman and I am to controlling, but that I am not . I am scared to trust again and to get hurt againI want to be a better woman help me please and no I am not no young woman i am 44 and gave up 22 years up for nothing as I finaly opened up and realized.
2006-09-25 02:19:37 · 10 answers · asked by pooh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Is this the same guy you were asking about in your last question?
If so, it may be he's trying to manipulate you.
My advice for you is to change only for YOU, & only in the ways that YOU feel you should change. It would be wrong & unhealthy thinking to try to change for HIM, & in the ways that HE wants. If he wants a different woman, then it's up to him to go out & find a different woman.
At 44 you are still a young woman. In another 22 yrs you will be only 66 & will still be capable of being in a relationship, & even starting a new one if you want to.
If you really want to learn & grow then try learning how to be more supportive of yourself.
You sound very desperate in your question. Try to tone down some of the desperation, & don't lose yourself in him.
2006-09-25 02:37:52 · answer #1 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hunny, He needs to understand what u have been through, U cant be a submissive women because ur not, He needs to accept u for who u are viseversa, SO what u do is set a date and tell him what the date is for (no surprises) let him know that u want to speak to him and come to an agreement (no arguments, be understanding) on how to deal with this dilema, remind him of ur past, but dont dwell to much on it if he dont understand you than unfortunately, he dosent deserve u.
2006-09-25 02:30:26 · answer #2 · answered by chinaz777 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly I dont think of you may decrease off her friendship with the aid of fact she is a suitable moderator. If she has replaced with the aid of fact of her place she will slowly substitute back... purely supply her time. she would be attentive to that being a suitable moderator is ultimately no longer something particular and that she shouldn't enable it get to her head. she will cool down interior the tip.. purely supply her area and time... dont hassle approximately it... in spite of everything you have had a sturdy friendship a majority of those years and you be attentive to what form of friendship she is able to and you enjoyed her friendship a majority of those years. For her to alter all of sudden in direction of you with the aid of fact of her place shows that there is a self-worth undertaking she had interior the 1st place... If I have been you, purely supply her area and time and seem to make new acquaintances off line in a community team someplace.. enable her be attentive to which you're busy with acquaintances offline doing activities interior the community etc etc. sturdy success
2016-10-17 22:42:53 · answer #3 · answered by montesi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have to change for anyone! Be yourself- if he doesn't like it- he's not the one for you- Age makes no difference...if he wants a submissive woman - that prob. means he is a control freak- and you aren't going to be happy- being told who you can see, talk to, when to spend money, when to go out w/ friends- I know- I got one of them and it sucks! Find a man that likes you for YOU- not someone he wants you to be! Good Luck! =)
2006-09-25 02:26:53 · answer #4 · answered by sawgirl513 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take a self-esteem class. It sounds like he thinks you are too needy and clingy which translates into "controlling" in his mind. Start working on yourself and your self-esteem and then maybe you'll attract someone who is emotionally available. Your "friend" sounds emotionally unavailable and is "hiding" this fact by saying he wants a submissive woman...
2006-09-25 02:23:40 · answer #5 · answered by cheyennetomahawk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just take it easy, girly. Go for the big one.
2006-09-25 02:20:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are wasting your time again
2006-09-25 02:22:05 · answer #7 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
write, write, write....seems tome you know how to write.....write it down polish it until it expresses what you want to say then give it to him
2006-09-25 02:26:12 · answer #8 · answered by l00kstwice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he is pushing then u wont lose
2006-09-25 02:28:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
text him
2006-09-25 02:20:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋