Ok I know that sounds like an obvious question but let me explain. I was dating this girl for 4 years when we decided to take a break. Rules of the break though, were that we would just talk less and not see other people. Well, a few months go by where we were still talking (but assuring eachother we weren't seeing anyone else. Anyway, turns out she was and did for a while. Anyway, after about 3 months and a lot of apologies I took her back. She has been great since (been about 8 months) but I haven't really gotten over the trust thing. Anyway, I put my profile on a dating site and have met someone that I am really interested in. Its only been 2 dates but there is a great connection. I don't think my girlfriend has any idea that I have these major doubts, and the relationship is probably 50/50 to survive. I just don't know if its worth throwing away a chance with this new girl just for 50/50. I mean I would hate it if this new girl turns out to be psycho and I lose my girlfriend.
2006-09-11 18:41:07 · 19 answers · asked by allcharm97 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Bird in the hand is better then 2 in the bush. Boy you are playing with fire if you had broken up with your girlfriend then it would be OK but to try and start something with someone you barely know and risk a 4 year relationship??? not good, your ending and starting a relationship for all the wrong reasons.
2006-09-11 18:46:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
These are two different questions.
1) Yes, it is wrong to make sure you have a "place to land" before you leave a relationship. Its cowardly. Oddly, chicks do it all the time and still - as you see from some of the answerers - chicks think of guys as the cheaters. What you are doing is wrong. It hurt you. You know it hurts. That's why its wrong.
2) There is risk in every decision. You want to live a safe - but deceitful - life by making sure the 2nd girl is good before dumping the first. Again, switch it around. You would feel horrible if a chick did this to you. In addition, you're supposed to be a man, and cowardice looks even worse on a guy.
Be a man. Do the right thing. Accept the consequences. Its obvious the "first" girl isn't "the one" for you, cuz you are tempted by this second girl. Realize this. Be a man and end it.
.
2006-09-11 18:52:33 · answer #2 · answered by robabard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, I think ur whole idea of taking a break is stupid. once couple decides to take a break, it always end up in a real breakup. I think it's a waste of time for u to start over with this girl. trust me, it wouldnt be the same as before. there'll be hiccups here and there. not to say she's bad or anything, but maybe something is wrong wif both of u being together.before things get worse such as u wake up one day - ten years later and realized u've made the wrong decision, it's better to stop now. It's much better to try on other girls even if it risks u to meet psycho or serial killer...:) Life is full of chances, if u dont take one, u never know where it'll bring u.
2006-09-11 18:50:35 · answer #3 · answered by miss.frosty 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well are you just doing this all to get back at girl#1? Also if a person leaves someone for another person it usually puts alot of doubt into that relationship since the other person knows and fears that they will get left for someone else.
2006-09-11 18:45:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to know that it isnt a good thing you try putting yourself in the other persons shoes that you have brought into this already screwed up situation and think about how you would feel now there you have the answer to your own question its just plain selfish.
2006-09-11 18:50:14 · answer #5 · answered by CaliMa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nothing ventured, nothing gained, or lost! I know how you feel, it's a big leap of faith, look deep before you leap! If you're not sure that the lose of your girl is worth it then go slow and close the door before you open another, don't hurt people and remember KARMA IS A MEAN *****! It pays back in the square root, or PIE!
2006-09-11 18:56:12 · answer #6 · answered by want2flybye 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Theres a big chance she will break up with you, after she begged for 3 months and you finally took her back. As much as you have the right to do it after she has done it, its just wrong, because she learned from her mistakes and your about to do what she just did.
2006-09-11 18:45:16 · answer #7 · answered by Gabe 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you said it yourself: she could be a psycho (and internet chicks mostly are). is it really worth risking a 4 year relationship? sounds to me that you just want to meet that girl out of revenge to what your girl did to you a few months ago. Don't be a cheater! you will never be able to have a honest relationship once you have betrayed her. and don't be selfish! if you want to get out of the relationship, then do so by breaking up.
2006-09-11 18:48:26 · answer #8 · answered by Milka 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ask yourself exactly what your girlfriend means to you. Is she worth giving up? If you hadn't met this new girl, would you still have doubts about your girlfriend? THIS QUESTION IS BEST ANSWERED BY YOURSELF! p.s Remember that you dont know this new girl. Make sure your not being played if you choose her. But PLEASE dont play your girlfriend either.
2006-09-11 18:55:27 · answer #9 · answered by Nicole 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU NEEDED TO BE HONEST WITH HER BEFORE YOU
GO INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE ELSE. YOU NEVER
START A REATIONSHIP UNTIL THE ONE YOU ARE IN
IS OVER. YOU NEED TO TELL HER THE TRUTH. AND'
GO FROM THERE. AS FOR THE OTHER GIRL SINCE
YOU HAVE ONLY BEEN OUT TWICE. JUST TELL HER'
YOU GOTTEN BACK WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND. BUT
YOU KNOW NOW THAT HONEST IS THE BEST POLICY.
2006-09-11 18:48:22 · answer #10 · answered by luckystar 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋