My son is 12 years old and in the 7th grade...Hes been getting detention in class for not doing homework...the other day i saw the like blood marks across the back of his neck. me and 3 others witnessed these marks...we aked what they was he said hes been itching. Tonight a parent called me..due to her son and my son are best friends. She told me these 2 black kids...has been walking up behind my son..smacking him very hard in the back of the neck.--its leavin blood-hickey streaks...when he went to the office MY SON got into trouble and dismissed on the black boys hitting him...this has been going on for weeks. The assistant prinicpal is all about the rich kids...if your not a rich kid then she doesnt give a shiit. Last year we had issues with her...she lied to me and my mothers face...then had the audacity to call us liars.
Tomorrow i am going in school...pressing charges...and getting answers...
I just need some advice...this hurts my heart..that my son is getting hurt at school!
2006-09-11 16:47:02 · 17 answers · asked by Sugar_Plumzz 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I am not saying my son is perfect...he is a normal 12 year old boy. When 2 differ parents call me at home due to there sons are worried about my son. The friends are telling there mothers that the boys are walking up to my son...all they will be doing in sitting at the table talking...and these kids will smack my son. One kids did it 4 times before school started...and one kid did it right after the bell rung...
By no means am i racist, but the black people here are like...you cant fight one...just like bees you would have to fight the whole swarm :(
2006-09-11 16:57:01 · update #1
I don't wanna make this worse or anything, but I went through the same trouble with administrators in my district from grade to high school. My mom weeped plentily for me just as much, so don't feel alone, and it wasn't until I got to college this fall that I completely relaxed from having to deal with such idiocracy.
I'm betting your son is just an ordinary kid with interests just like any other kid his age and he doesn't have any particularly odd problems. Maybe he's brilliant. Maybe he's athletic. Maybe he's musical. Maybe he's a deep thinker. Whatever the case, he's a good boy.
Because of this, you want to make sure that you DON'T get all fired up for a major confrontation about this. The school has tons more resources behind it than you do, and chances are they'll just intimidate you and the fellow mothers to the point that you either blow up on them giving an excuse to treat YOU like a little kid or make YOU feel like a moron for approaching THEM.
First off, get your son's Dad involved. My Dad wasn't very active in getting my problems taken care of, but his business partner had a son who was bright and talented like myself and still got in trouble. The BP took the initiative, got in the other kids' parents faces and made them back down. Then he dealt with the administration using confidence (and the threat of an attorney) to force them to fold. Also, I know I would revere my father much more highly if he showed some balls in defending me more than he did in disciplining me. We get along, but I'd like him more if I had some more heroic memories of him standing up for me.
Second off, explain to your son some of the real facts of life. He'll still be embarrassed and ashamed of himself for what happened, but remember that he's only 12 so he's still open to listening. Inspire some confidence in him not just in the emotional abstract sense, but in giving him a sense of accomplishment as well. Frankly put, he's gotta know he can beat the $hlt out of someone even if it means making an idiot of himself and going entirely berzerk. It took me until 8th grade for me to win my first schoolyard fight which started with a few focused blows and resulted in the kid being massacred by the end, but all in all I really won because I believed in myself and realized I did have street smarts. They had just never come out before.
Lastly, with regards to your own well-being, do something physical to let out all of your rage. I don't mean breaking stuff nor do I mean doing something as rigorous or dramatic as sprinting your heart and lungs out till you're on your knees wheezing, catching your breath. Go for a swim. Join a kick-boxing class. Whatever it takes, and forget about everything in the world when you do it. Don't even THINK about damaging something symbolically or working the rage out of your system. Like the old Nike commercials, JUST DO IT.
I wish you the best of luck and HOPE it gets better for the two of you (I genuinely and authentically really do since I have just escaped that gauntlet). This sort of thing typically isn't simple to work out. Taking it day by day, not holding grudges, and always doing something innovative are the best hints I can give you. Another thing is don't question your own motives or actions. You're the best judge and decision-maker here. So make a choice, plan it out, and execute it.
:-)
2006-09-11 17:17:18 · answer #1 · answered by Mikey C 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW - it's good that you are pressing charges. This is unbelievable. The point of school is supposed to be learning. How can a decent kid go to school and learn while being harassed all day long? You need to find the other moms like the one you mentioned so that you have a united voice. That will have a greater impact than one person against the principal. I'd cry too - but you're doing what any responsible and loving mom would do and moms are much tougher than people give us credit for. You can fight this - and win. In the meantime, I'd suggest getting your son into a different school and suing for the costs so that he can learn in peace. Obviously going to those bad boys moms isn't going to make a difference. You could try but might create more issues and you don't want to get into a fight with anyone if you're going to press charges. You're a great mom.
2006-09-11 23:55:29 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I work for a school district and this here is totally intolerable regardless of what warranted the attacks. If your son did something, anything to urge these boys it should have been handled immediately, and by professionals working closely with the children. document your every meeting with the principal. If she continues to do nothing go to the next person in the chain of command; superintendent of the school board. this harbors on child neglect, abuse, and endangerment.
Always be calm collective and cautious. Don't let them see your b!*chy side. Justice shall be your friend!
2006-09-12 02:22:09 · answer #3 · answered by girlsm9frmgod 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What are you waiting for.. Go down to the school and see for yourself. There is no law that says a parent can not be in the school during school hours. It's not like you don't have reason enough to want to be there. If the school principal isn't taking much interest in your son's well being.. take it to the school district or where ever you need to go . But dont let your son have to go through one more day ALONE in that school. It's hard I know and you might have to take time from work. But what's more important? Just do something about it.. and what ever you do dont let your son think he's alone in this one. Statistics show that kids who get bullied at school develop scocial problems later on in life. Do something now.. and yes I'm mad. Sorry but things like this piss me off.
2006-09-11 23:53:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
you need to have a parent conference with the teachers,principles,and parents of the other children involved and make sure not to makle it a racial or rich thing because then that is all they will see and it will make you look bad or give them a reason to discredit you (which it sounds like they may be looking for a easy way out ,so don't give it to them!). Tell them you want answers,you want this issued resolved you do not want your son losing out on his education for any reason and you want to know how they plan on helping you get this resolved for the best interest for your child and if this does continue what they plan on doing about it.But make sure you keep a open mind maybe your son also teases (not saying he does but go in there with a open mind or they will have something on you,don't be to defensive (I know it is hard!) just keep calm) I just went through this 2 yrs ago with my 14yr old brother he got jumped, as long as you make them responsible for anything that happens ,they will be more apt to do something let them know calmly of all the issues and your concerns and you do not want them boys by yours,change his schedule. (If all fails change school - no its not fair but at least he will be safe-which is what is important all in all.) And yes it is gonna be hard for your son if you go in there being a momma bear but it is for his safety and some kids may tease him just because his mom came to school. GOOD LUCK
2006-09-12 00:03:12 · answer #5 · answered by impala1972 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
As others have said, document your conversations with the school authorities.
If you have been unable to resolve this with the school system, seriously consider bringing this to the District Attorney's office and to the media rather than waste time with the school system.
Good luck to you,
2006-09-14 04:11:01 · answer #6 · answered by Ragnarok 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every conversation you have with the school...document. Take a pad and pen with you take notes with the date and time and who you talked to. Write letters to your school board. Let the school know that you will be writing a letter to the editor of your local paper....then do it! Contact local media TV stations...sometimes they will call the school and start asking questions. If you don't get the answers or actions you need from the school, ask "Who is your supervisor?" DO NOT LET THEM INTIMIDATE YOU!!!!! They work FOR you! You have to become a pain their side! Make LOTS of noise! Been there, done that! Good luck!
2006-09-12 00:33:26 · answer #7 · answered by Cinner 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
tell her if she can't keep a better eye on the students and havbe hall monitors and police officers there then she will lose her job because you can press charges and make her lose her job for lack of care child endangerment and witness of abuse in school property. go public with the news if you have to show her face all over make her embarrased the news doesn't lie. she doesn't deserve to be anything if she can't think of your son an dhis friend as if they were her own she is responsible for them and that is a crime . neglect child endangerment and so on. if it was my son i would get the lady fired andi would have her all over the news..
2006-09-11 23:53:01 · answer #8 · answered by Da Q 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Meet with the principal and bring a hidden voice recorder so you capture everything that is said. Tell the principal that if the problem isn't corrected immediately, you will have your son attend another school, report the abuse to child protective services and take the abuse public. Take photos of your sons injuries so you have a record of the abuse. Chances are if this is happening to him, it's happening to others. Good Luck.
2006-09-12 00:26:49 · answer #9 · answered by microwaved-brain 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
If what you say is true, I would get an attorney at this point, or think about sending your kid to another school, move to another district. Are you SURE your son is doing NOTHING to provoke these attacks? Rmember, kids will lie to get what they want, so be certain.
2006-09-11 23:52:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋