My husband's best-friend's wife does this every time they host a party. They ask that the guests bring a majority of the food or chip in money for it and they also ask for the guests to bring their own beer or beverages. I told my husband I am sick of going over to their home since they are so cheap. They live about an hour from us too. When you host a party shouldn't you be supplying the food or something?
2006-09-11 09:38:29 · 30 answers · asked by TinaSmiley 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It's not necessarily rude-- that's how potluck dinners work, after all.
But, I think it's rude if other friends routinely do supply the food and drink for parties, and they're the only exceptions. And, it's rude if they're making a "profit", by keeping more food and drink than are consumed at the party.
2006-09-11 09:44:10 · answer #1 · answered by btsmith_y 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If the hosts also furnish at least some of the food, then it isn't rude. They might not be able to spend huge amounts on party favours because of low income or whatever, but if they can at least supply something like all of the chips n dips, or some of the wine, then it's not rude for guests to supply much of the rest.
By bringing along a bottle of wine or a platter of food, you are honouring your hosts.
The potlatch party is something similar - guests are required to bring something to a potlatch.
Finally, if you're concerned about this, turn the tables around. Invite all of the guests from the last party to your place, including the hosts you think are so mean. Take the weight off their bank accounts for a change, and see for yourself how much it costs these days to budget for a party.
2006-09-11 09:47:33 · answer #2 · answered by fiat_knox 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not rude to do so. When I host a party I generally provide all of the food, but if there is ever a time when I really don't feel up to doing all that work or have to work the same day of the party, I ask people to bring something. The women might make something or buy something already prepared & the guys usually bring the drinks. Most people are really ok with that.
2006-09-11 10:01:33 · answer #3 · answered by somebrowning 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many people automatically ask the host of the party what they can bring, because it is the polite thing to do. Unless they call it a potluck specifically, guests should not be required to bring something. Usually when someone hosts a party they should supply guests with the main course as well as beverages.
2006-09-11 10:07:01 · answer #4 · answered by jtj 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well... theres a friendly pot luck.... and then there is cheapness! You might try hosting a stylish party at your house and inviting them to show them what a good party is.
I think its perfectly fine to ask guests to bring a bag of chips, or a dish if it is a friendly get together. But you should be supplying the majority of the food.
2006-09-11 09:42:24 · answer #5 · answered by ChaChaChingThing 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is rude, they should call it a pot-luck, not a party. They should be providing the main staples and the guests just the extras on a voluntary basis. You may wanna stay home and let your man ride solo if her lack of etiquette will disrupt your mood at the party.
Once on Ask Prudie, someone asked a similar question, and one time she decided to bring a side dish instead of the main meal, needless to say the party thrower was upset - how rude right?
2006-09-11 09:45:15 · answer #6 · answered by GirlUdontKnow 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Can you afford to supply booze and food to all your friends? A party paid for by one person or couple can come to a lot of money. If everyone is happy to bring a dish and a bottle to enjoy with friends then what is the problem? The point of the evening is to enjoy the company of friends so if you feel that this is too much for you then see how your husband feels when you ask him to give up his best friend because you don't like to share.
2006-09-11 09:49:18 · answer #7 · answered by Lee 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't think so. I have a HUGE family, and all of our Parties, no matter how big or small, no matter who is hosting it, we always do it "Pot Luck" style. I even asked people to bring a dish for my daughters first birthday party. With everyone pitching in food, it makes it so much less stressful, especially for a busy mom like myself and every other mother out there in the world!!! Hope this helps put things in a new perspective for you. If you are tired of having to bring stuff, then say thanks but no thanks to your friends invitation to parties.
2006-09-11 10:38:33 · answer #8 · answered by Easter Bunny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it is cheesy to do that all the time. It's ok to have a pot luck once in a while, but not every party. They should be supplying something- drinks, appetizers, dessert, whatever. Maybe just have dinner before you go, and bring cupcakes or a bag of chips.
2006-09-11 09:44:20 · answer #9 · answered by aqualovefire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bringing a dish to pass is becoming the norm. In some cases it's quite proper. For instance, we hosted a party for my bro-in-law who was visiting recently. We requested everyone bring something, because the party was for THEM, not for us.
But if you were to invite people to one of those annoying Tupperware-type parties, you should supply everything. If you're holding a housewarming, you should supply everything. If the party is for you, you should supply everything.
I think that's the key there - if you're simply hosting a get-together, it's appropriate for everyone to chip in, although you, as host, should perhaps supply a majority. But if the party is in some way for your benefit, YOU are responsible for the supplies.
2006-09-11 09:42:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋