Always put 3 daughters 1st Loved them more than life itself. Told them, showed them, gave them time, love, education, things, etc. They always said their childhood was best ever.
Last year first born called crying at 1a.m. Boyfriend had hit her, asked to be picked up. Went with husband to ger her and her stuff which she had already packed. Came back home, boyfriend showed up & refused to leave. Husband called cops, cops escorted boyfriend home. Daughter (27, economist, bipolar) can't forgive us, declared us dead, cut all contact for 1 yr. aprox.
Now, we're trying to re-establish a relationship. When we told 2 other daughters all heck broke loose. 2nd daughter (25, lawyer), refuses to be in same room as oldest sister, called us her parents dumb & worse for wanting to have contact with eldest. Will stay away if we're with sister.
3rd daughter (23, Med student) agrees w/2nd. They're angry & disrespectful of our decision. We're devastated. Suggestions please? Explanations?
2006-09-11 09:23:09 · 7 answers · asked by Celeste A 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
They are adults and educated adults stop treating them like children. let them have their tantrums and stick by all of them equally and tell them that. They are being divisive, not you. Quietly, remind them you are their mother and should be treated with respect. Tell them they are always welcome, but to stay away until they have calmed down if necessary.
2006-09-11 09:35:59 · answer #1 · answered by Mike10613 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your other two daughters, for being a med student and one a lawyer...they are
being selfish and very immature. Who are they..to tell you not to speak to ANY
of your children. You gave them life.....now they're on their own. All you can do
now is try to talk to them seperately. If they disrespect you still....just say to
them, that they are selfish, and you won't put up with being disrespected !!
Stand your ground. Do what you feel is right. You just can't make your grown
children do anything. They will have to respect whatever desisions you make
And if they don't. Don't worry about them anymore. Leave the door open,...
but only as long as they show you the RESPECT you deserve. You seem to
have been a good mother.....this is their problem, not yours. Ignore them.
It's called tough love mom.
2006-09-11 20:19:04 · answer #2 · answered by CraZyCaT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family problems are the worst yet. Establish the relationship with your eldest. YOU CAN'T forget she wasn't born unto you.In time every piece will take place.Kind of like a puzzle. You cannot deny your daughter love and that hurts the other daughters in the long run, they'll get over it because right now, You have to make peace with your daughter. Or she has to make peace with you...The other daughters are just being territorail and looking after you so you don't get hurt. that's all. It will pass once they know everythings OK...
2006-09-11 16:29:50 · answer #3 · answered by amylr620 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is only normal for a parent to want to be with their child and have a relationship with that child. Maybe this sister has harmed the other 2 in some way you are not aware of, if so it may take awhile to rebuild a relationship for them. Maybe for now you and your husband should work at it without the other 2 involved and see how things progress. Good luck
2006-09-11 16:28:17 · answer #4 · answered by ladynamedjane 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you discussed what it means to be bi-polar with your 2 daughters and how it can effect decision making. Have they ever read any of the information that is out there on the subject. Sounds like a case of ignorance to me.The med student should have some knowledge about the subject and if not should read up on
2006-09-11 16:31:49 · answer #5 · answered by Red 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They just don't want to see you get hurt again!
I have been through alot of family struggles, and I know that it is touph to handle. If your fist daughter has apologized to you, and you have forgivin her.. then that's a good start!
But you can only forgive so many times! Family equals pain.. it just draws you closer to them. Keep in my mind, you other two daughters, the youngest ones, just dont want to see you get hurt. If the eldest is in an abusive relationship.. she really needs to get out of it! Don't pressure her, or judge her for staying with him! Just a bit of courage, takes alot! If you want to keep your relationship with your oldest daughter... then your on the right track! The other two will eventually come around!!! Have no worries! If they love you, then they will eventually understand!
2006-09-11 16:36:22 · answer #6 · answered by Val 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
UR CHILDREN ARE NOT ANGRY THY ARE EMBARRASSED BY SIBLING.PLZ UNDERSTAND THEY ARE TRYING TO PROTECT U. JUST LET ECONOMIST BI POLAR KNOW YOU LOVE HER AND LET HER MAKE FIRST MOVE.YOUR HEALTH IS PARAMOUNT.
2006-09-11 16:32:32 · answer #7 · answered by miraclehand2020 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋