She was in a 3 yr relationship and he dumped her, cause she wanted to get married. So she went into deep depression, bought a Harley and met a guy at a rally. She has 3 kids. Now after 6 weeks they are engaged. He does everything right, sends flowers, buys the kids stuff, helps around the house, even put a georgous ring in her wine glass, and he is over at her house almost the minute she gets home.everyday. He kind of talks down to everyone (even his mom), but not to my daughter. He has no kids but wants one. Her brothers and I seem to think there is something wrong with him. We can't put our finger on it, but we think he is controlling. I have been out of work and my daughter pays me for taking care of the grandkids. I am looking for a job but really need this little bit of money. Now they say that as of October 1, she is getting her hours changed so she can get the kids to school and he will pick them up. how can she do that to her mom? Am I wrong? Am I thinking of only me?
2006-09-11 06:43:02 · 10 answers · asked by barbiedoodle55 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I must admit it is odd. However there are two problems I see here.
1.) The man is a biker dude. They typically are not ready for relationships and if you feel he is a control freak then he probably is.
2.) He wants a child. That probably would not be the best. Your daughter already has 3 children. I think she would be child birthed out.
I think what is going on here, is your daughter thinks Husband = Stability for her children. We all know this isn't true.
No I think this is a relationship I would encourage your daughter to wait on. Time will show his true colors.
2006-09-11 06:49:59 · answer #1 · answered by mikeae 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The first part that bothers me about your question is that you mention that he talks down to everyone but her, including his mother.. I have always found that looking at the way a man treats the women in his family, ie...mom, aunt, grandmother.., is a great indicator of how he will eventually treat me.. If he talks down to his mother, chances are he will eventually treat her the same way.. Sounds more like he is putting on a real good show to get her to be with him, by taking advantage of the fact that she wants marriage and that she is vulnerable right now..
6 weeks is way too soon for an engagement under the best of circumstances, I think, and the one you describe is far from the best.. Doesn't sound like you are only thinking of you and, no, I don't believe that you are wrong to worry..
2006-09-11 06:52:39 · answer #2 · answered by Termite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your daughter is moving toooo soon; especially since she has kids. I truly doubt you can change her mind on any of the topics above. The change up with the kids is probably her way of saving money for her wedding. If you really need the cash sit her down and express yourself. She may be making a big mistake with this guy and if so, I hope she finds out sooner than later.
2006-09-11 06:56:27 · answer #3 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never know. I met my husband in June of 2003 and was married in August 2003. And Im living happily ever after...
Im sorry you wont be getting that money anymore, but you really have no arguement there.
Your concerns may be valid, but if she loves him, and he loves her, and she has no problem with what is between them, then you need to step back and hope for the best for her and her children.
2006-09-11 06:52:03 · answer #4 · answered by darcys_wifey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say so, but if two people really love each other then it is okay. I would say you should live with the person for a few years and see what happends from that. It these two people really love each other, maybe they know they are ready for marriage and it is okay.
2006-09-11 06:45:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is definately too soon especially since she is on the rebound. If she doesn't take things a lot slower she could end up with real trouble.
2006-09-11 06:47:05 · answer #6 · answered by jusme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you have a lot of questions.first,yes 6 weeks is to soon to get engaged,but she is grown and changing her mind probably is out of the question.she will find out in due time,but she will have to find out,as family just help her get through it when it happens.he probably said something to your daughter about day care.she thinks she is in love.you just have to let her go.we learn from our mistakes.sorry you have to go through it to.just pray
2006-09-11 06:59:47 · answer #7 · answered by cool mom32 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a life of your own
2006-09-11 07:03:42 · answer #8 · answered by Babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry Hun but it sounds like your thinking only of yourself.
2006-09-11 06:45:55 · answer #9 · answered by david k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe they are ready maybe it was love at 1st sight !!!!!
2006-09-11 06:53:11 · answer #10 · answered by ♥l.0.v.E♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋