Am I mean for not letting someone throw a baby shower for me ?

Question

Two of my neighbors wants to throw a baby for me. I talk with one of them sometimes. The other one , I have not really talked too. She had her two year old son taken away from her by child protective services . They say that her husband was abusing him. I think she abused her son also. I do not want to have anything to do with someone that has abused their child. I do not want to hurt the one lady's feelings, because she is really nice. I don't care if the other ones feelings are hurt because of what she has done to her son. How do I get out of this ? I would rather not have one at all now. Thanks

This will be for my second child.

My family is in Pa and we live in GA. I am not going to get a baby shower from anyone else.

We can afford to buy everything on our own. We do not need a baby shower. I was thinking about inviting some people over for cake and icecream to celebrate.

Answer 1

I suggest that you have the two ladies work together. This might be a good opportunity for you to be a good friend to someone who needs a healthy, good example in her life.

I know you are having a baby and all, but this isn't all about you right now. There are still other people in the world that need encouragement and support.

Good luck dear. Be kind.

EDIT: I see from your homepage that you profess the name of Christ Jesus in your life. As a fellow believer in Christ, may I encourage you to not be so judgmental toward people who have struggled with sin in their lives. You too were once a sinner and though you have been saved have not received your glorified body so even you still struggle with sin, therefore you should not be so bold as to imply that God has no forgiveness or blessing for a mother who has committed the sin of abortion.

God has made provision for their sin through Christ Jesus and if He blesses that person with a child in the future, then it is His will and no one else's. To summarize, you really should not tell someone that they do not deserve to ever have a child if they once had an abortion.

Answer 2

Well, that's a tough situation. But it is wise of you to not want to deal with someone who has been cruel to her children. I would speak privately to the nice neighbor and explain to her your reasons for not wanting a baby shower; hoping that she understands. Then again, maybe the "mean" lady had nothing to do with her son being taken away, or perhaps wants to change. It is always good to love thy neighbor and if they are thrilled to do this for you,you might as well accept the gift. You never know what good things may happen. Perhaps you could give her a chance and really get to know her, then make your decision. I hope this helped you. Best wishes.

Answer 3

I didn't want a baby shower. So I told people I didn't want a baby shower. My mother-in-law tried to throw me one but I just said I didn't have enough girl friends that would participate. Tell them a friend of yours has already started planning a baby shower, while you appreciate the offer, you already have one planned. You don't have to invite them because normally the person who throw the baby shower is pretty much in charge of invitations. Be polite but direct. Good Luck!

Answer 4

You are not selfish at all. Thank them kindly but let them know a family member has already taken on that task. I don't blame you. Frankly I don't associate with people who abuse their children. I don't want that kind of crap around my family or my child. I would be very careful having that type of person around your family. Girl this is your life and stand up for it. Feelings or not. Be strong say thank you and tell them someone else is doing that for you.

Answer 5

It feels like a hectic time of year for you. As somebody stated, 7.5-8 months sounds solid. It seems such as you could ought to integrate weekends with something. in keeping with risk on a various day of the thanksgiving weekend (which you're actually not having a huge turkey dinner). in keeping with risk the bathe ought to additionally be infant-thanksgiving themed? might make for a special thought. I concern you sharing the day mutually with your daughters birthday nevertheless. i'm undecided how attentive to it she'd be appropriate now considering that she is merely 2 years yet she is going to ought to be sharing plenty, alongside along with her time accessible with you, interior the close to destiny. in keeping with risk doing it on the comparable day might not be the terrific for that reason? provide her one final special occasion of her very own. even nevertheless, the day formerly or after her bday social gathering might paintings. i've got additionally been to a pair of showers that have been interior the night on a weekday on the grounds that's so problematic to hit upon a weekend day that incorporates each and every physique.

Answer 6

Honey, you don't have to let anyone do anything you don't want them to when it comes to you and your baby.

Regarding abuse, whether or not it was the husband, the mother still allowed it to happen. I wouldn't want that kind of person around me or my children.

Just say, "Thanks for the offer, but I already have plans for a baby shower at my mothers up in (name a city 3-4 hours away)." or "Thanks for the offer, but I'm really worn out and don't think I have the energy for a baby shower any time soon" and leave it at that. You don't even have to give them any sort of justification if you don't want to. If it makes you feel better, simply say "Thanks for the offer, but no thanks."

Answer 7

I think that you should let the neighbor that you kinda like let her have a shower for you because she wants you to feel special and you should. Now the other lady I have no idea tell her not to come. But you should have the shower. Hope this helps. Plus more gifts for you and the baby.

Answer 8

I understand how you feel, If family has already thrown one or is planning on it just keep it at that, tell your neighbors you arent feeling well, and that they should just wait until after the baby is born and come visit on their own. or just sit through it and take the free stuff and smile and say thanks , just dont call them for lunch or if you need a sitter, good luck.

Answer 9

just let them do that for you ,you will need all you can get for ur babys and about that lady abusing her son ,call dcfs on her dont wait anylonger you no that boy is suffering and as a mom to be will you like someone 2 hurt ur baby?? no. call report her plez maybe she will be locked up soon and wont have 2 do you a shower

Answer 10

just tell them the truth about not wanting one.
plenty of preggers ladies don't want the hassle of the big party. and nobody smart dare go against a pregnant ladies wishes...hehe.