Do you think church is like a social club?

Question

I'm a Christian but socially awkward. So fitting in with some Christians at church is kinda hard.

Answer 1

Church is a cultural ritual performed mostly out of habit by people who have nothing else in common and no contact with each other outside that setting. It seems most relationships created at church never go beyond that affiliation and if you leave for another church all those relationships end as well, which I believe indicates they really are just built on membership and not any real mutual interest and commonality. Even with all the denominations, the types of folks that show up a church vary widely and their interest in each other is very contingent.

But if I get the subtext of your question, I think being socially awkward is mostly a function of being in a group of people that don't interest you and who aren't interested in you because the reason for your gathering is a cultural ritual and not specific to the interests and concerns of the individuals. Social awkwardness usually occurs because you don't know how to fake interest in someone or some issue they are discussing.

I find that people who are smoothest socially are also the most insincere. The fellow running around the room getting thirty second responses to his standard, "How's the Lord treating you this week?" is simply establishing his social dominance by putting you on the spot for a religiously acceptable response that he isn't actually interested in before running over to the next person he wants to be seen by.

I think if you attended a meeting related to your personal hobbies, interests and concerns, you probably would find you're not really all that awkward. Most all of us talk easily about things that matter to us, no matter who we are talking to, especially if those things matter to them as well.

Though Christians know they are supposed to have feelings for each other and grow in the bonds of Christian love, the fact is people don't really bond with someone over something as broad, non-commital and non-specific as ritualistic conformity to the dominant religion of their culture. If you were a Christian in a country where Christians are pursued and killed for their faith, meeting in secret in small conclaves with people for whom their faith was in deadly earnest and the over-arching concern of their life, then you'd bond. In fact, because Christians dominate in the US and this isn't very motivating for tithes and offerings, preachers like John Hagee drum up non-existent threats and end-times scenarios to create an artificial sense of peril which requires personal zeal and sacrifice.

Answer 2

Church should be like a Community. Everyone should be there to help everyone else when the need arises. It shouldn't be a club because that indicates that you have to be a member. It should be somewhat social, but if that's the only point, the congregation would be seriously missing out.

You need to find a church that feels right to you. If there's no one for you to connect to, you may need to keep looking. It's hard to be introverted in a setting that flourishes through communication isn't it. I'm introverted too.

Answer 3

I absolutely agree with you. I feel very uncomfortable sitting in church. Like I need to fit into a nitch somewhere like in highschool. It seems the more money you make or the better you dress, then the more important you are. I grew up believing that God loved you no matter what. But, it seems that if you dont go to church than you can't possibly believe in God. I have a problem with that. So...I can worship and believe in God in my own home, and dressed as I want.

Answer 4

I agree fullyyt! I published a question it sluggish in the past entitled "what's incorrect with the church of immediately?" I had made comparable observations myself. the only reason the hot testomony church exists is to accomplish the comprehensive cost. yet it style of feels that maximum church homes immediately are no longer something extra desirable than social golf equipment which forget approximately relating to the very objective that they have got been created for. i'm grateful that we attend an autonomous church that's fullyyt Bible primary. there continues to be no opposite direction for a individual to be saved than to have faith on the Lord Jesus Christ. all the "stable social intentions" in this international carried out by a church can no longer and wont lead somebody to a saving know-how of the certainty. It became obvious to me by the years that maximum church homes of immediately have "lost it" and that they are going no the place. the easy actuality is that every person adult men have a desperate want for the saving grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and maximum of them do no longer look to comprehend it. The blame for this falls squarely on the church with the aid of fact the comprehensive cost replaced into purely ever given to the church and no different physique has the authority to hold it out. The Gospel message seems to are becoming to be distorted with the help of guy by the years and immediately we've a sort of properly intentioned people who have not yet come to the understanding of the undeniable fact that every person adult men harbor a subject which finally sends them to hell. it rather is called "sin interior the flesh" that's a subject handed directly to all adult men from Adam. Tragically immediately, the church has did no longer address this difficulty and for many, their church attendance has strengthen into no longer something extra desirable than a lifestyle. I agree fullyyt with what you assert.

Answer 5

One of the main functions of a church is fellowship. All sorts of people go to any specific church, so you will find the same cross-sections of people there as you do anywhere (both good and bad). The good news is, you will normally find more people that are accepting and open to meeting you.

Answer 6

Well churches DO have a lot of activities for it's members but that's to give people of the same beliefs a chance to have fellowship with others that believe as they do.

Answer 7

Church is not a social club.(some churches really are).You can go to a Pentecostal Church.It is not a social club,but they are happy people,and have not too much legalism than other churches have.Good question.

Answer 8

Yes, just don't go to church. You don't have to go to church to be christian.

Answer 9

Definitely. For the most part, all of my Christian friends who attend Church don't tell me some new Spiritual insight they learned. They tell me that "so-n-so said such-n-such about you know who" Or which woman has been gossiping about another couple who is struggling in their marriage...etc... etc....

Answer 10

nope church should only be for God. remember the other Christians aren't going to bite SO be bold, be nice, be friendly and talk to them and your guaranteed to make a friend