my mom and dad are arguing. Normally, they argue and they are okay. But this time, they don't want to sleep in the same room. Neither one wants to give in. my dad has'nt ate for one day. they didn't talk at all today. Im sad and frightened. my mom is crying all the way in her room. and my dad been sleeping on the couch from just now. what should i do?
2006-09-11 04:17:32 · 15 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
welll actually, i know their problems. Yest, my grandmother past away. and i left only my grandma who is on my father side. which means she's my father's mom.
the thing is, me, my sister and my brother, are closer with my mom's mother. and went she left us, we were crying so much. my mom too. on her funeral, my grandmother(myfather side) was there. we did'nt entertain her at all, because we were sad. and we were mouning over her death. So, my grandmother(my father side) went up to my dad, telling him how rude we were. My dad went up to us and scold us. and then on that particular day, after her funeral, he drag us all to my grandmother(my father side) house. He even left us behind when entering the elevator. When we were there, my mom were telling my grandmother about how rude he was. my mom was crying her heart out. and we all were. my brother raised his voice and asked him why he left everyone behind? all this happens because of jealousy.
2006-09-11 04:41:36 · update #1
well, truth about my father is, he is a very hot tempered man. he likes to throw his temper to everyone when he is fustrated of angry. and when this happens, he blame it on my mom. he was shouting away saying that my mom teach us to love her mom more.
and about my grandmother(beside my father), she's a very mean person. i guess all this happen because of her. she love making my family this way. well, i can see she treats my mother differently then the rest of her in-laws. she used scold my sister vulgarities when she talks a lot. tell me why we should love her after all this?!
2006-09-11 04:46:26 · update #2
Sorry to hear what you are going through.
It’s not an easy thing to deal with having parents who are fighting all the time.
It sort of makes you wonder sometimes, who the adults are, and who the kids are.
I don’t know how old you are, so it makes it a bit hard for me to know what advice I should try to offer you.
Do you know what the arguments are about?
Is there ‘violence’ involved?
Would you be putting yourself at risk if you were to talk to your parents?
I’m sort of thinking along the lines of you approaching each of them individually, and telling them how much you love them, and how their fighting is tearing your heart apart !!!
My concern of course would be that if you did say anything, they may perhaps be violent or abusive toward you.
I’d really hate for that to happen (No doubt you would too!!!)
Are there other family members or close family friends who may be able to help you?
The thing is that you really do need to get away from the fights for a while. It is very wrong for you to be caught in the middle of all that crap, and unless you can get away from it, there’s a good chance that it will leave you ‘emotionally scarred’ for many years to come. (I can say that from personal experience, because I am fifty-five years of age, and I still carry the scars of my parents’ violent relationship !!!)
Do you have any relatives who live close by, or some friends who you could perhaps stay with, while things hopefully settle down a bit with your parents?
Is there someone else who may perhaps be able to talk to your parents, and make them realise how their arguments are causing you so much sorrow?
I’m sorry if I’m not being too helpful to you…
Your parents do need to be made to realise that it is very wrong for them to be hurting you the way they are.
They are supposed to be ‘responsible adults’ and for them to be causing you so much pain, is so very, very wrong !!!
I sincerely hope that things get better for you soon…
Hang in there, and take care !!!
2006-09-11 04:19:22 · answer #1 · answered by I_C_Y_U_R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry you are having to see and hear this arguing. I know how sad and frightened you must be. I'm not sure of your age but you seem very mature. Could you just ask one or the other if you could go stay with a grandparent or friend for a few days because their problems are making you feel so awful? Parents will have disagreements but they should not be doing this in front of their children. It hurts the child and changes who they are forever. Please ask if you can leave until they settle their problems and can live peacefully with each other and around you.
2006-09-11 04:37:16 · answer #2 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry this is happening to you,this is a repeat of my life and now my parents are divorced but I was too young to do anything about it.But you're old enough to try to help.What you could do is try to sit them down and talk to them about what's going on.Tell them you're upset to see them this way because you love them and you know deep down they love each other and they're just going through some problems right now.They'll either try to tell you they're okay or they'll tell you not to worry about it.Be persistent,tell them you know something is up and you're worried about what might happen.You could also try professional counseling or talk to a guidance counselor at school and they can give you some options also.Just know that it's not your fault,and if they do get divorced in the end you tried to help and it's not your fault it didn't work out,okay.I wish you the best of luck and I hope it works out.
2006-09-11 04:29:36 · answer #3 · answered by charmed_ones_lover 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is really hard when mom and dad are fighting, but there are times, just like with brothers and sisters that fighting will happen. That being said, this really isn't the place for you to seek help. If you are in school, maybe you can go and talk with your school counsellor. If you belong to a church, ask to talk with someone there. I will keep good thoughts for you and your family.
2006-09-11 04:29:58 · answer #4 · answered by pskomorn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how old you are but I would not get involved. It has to be hard but things have their way of working out if it is meant to be. Just show them that you are strong by not acting out and just be yourself, be the better person and start up a conversation about something other then the arguing.
2006-09-11 04:26:18 · answer #5 · answered by momma whitley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call your dad to the sitting room,then call your mom too.let them sit down on the same couch and sit on another couch then ask them whether what they are doing is proper.make sure you poor out your whole heart.ifpossible,cry mercilessly and after that,work out of the sitting room and take a walk.before you come back,they may have made up.i tried it on my parents and it worked out.
2006-09-11 04:30:08 · answer #6 · answered by Aliyu J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have Grandparents, or Aunts, Uncles that you could talk to? You need someone to talk too. If you want to get your parents attention, talk to one of them and tell them that you really need to go and talk to someone about all the problems that are happening at home, and that maybe they could come with you. You have every right to speak up.
2006-09-11 04:29:07 · answer #7 · answered by pecksun8 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get involved. Let your parents solve their own problems. Once you start to help them, they will then start to depend on you to do this every time. Do tell them how you feel. How uncomfortable it makes you feel to see them act that way and tell them it hurts you deeply. I'm not sure if this will help, but give it a try.
2006-09-11 04:25:48 · answer #8 · answered by Sunshine1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure they will work things out eventually. Just stay clear of both of them. Try to comfort your mom and ask her why is she fighting with your dad. Good luck!
2006-09-11 04:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let them know that you are upset by the arguing. Other than that you have to let them work it out. Don't worry too much adults argue sometimes. Pray for them. God bless and keep you all.
2006-09-11 04:26:36 · answer #10 · answered by nana_bad_ass 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋