daughter 3 doesn't want to poop. what do i do????

Question

She won't go to the bathroom and poop right away. she says she doesn 't need to. I know she has to go, but it takes 4 to 5 days to finally get her to go. then its a battle to get her to go. she says it doesn't hurt, Any suggestions. I've tried everything. it is very upsetting because she acts like she is miserable but still won't go.

Answer 1

What to do...
Leave her alone.
If she is potty trained & there is no worry of an "accident", just leave her in her panties to go when she needs.
Otherwise, put her in some "pull-ups"...
It sounds to me like almost a power struggle between the two of you having to do with her taking a poop.
My best long term "Mom advice"... would be... pick & choose your battles carefully... this is just the start.

Answer 2

Stop making a big deal out of it. She might be afraid of the potty, or she might just be in a power struggle with you. So put her diapers back on if you must, but just let her do this in her own time. There's no reason to fight on potty training as they all get it at some point or another.

Make sure she has plenty of fluids and maybe even a little prune or grape juice or raisins every day. At some point she'll go because she'll have no choice. Think about it - can you hold it in every day? She can't either. So if she's really going days between movements, she isn't getting nearly enough fiber in her diet.

That's bad news. As a toddler, there's no reason at all she shouldn't be eating a wholly nutritious diet that is rich with vegetables and fruits, and sugary junk should be almost non-existent. Meat and potatoes isn't healthy for anyone, and the early years is the only time you have full control of what she eats, without the peer pressure that school will bring.

So...make sure she gets plenty of liquids. Milk, water, diluted juice. NO SODA. Constipation can be caused by inadequate water in the body so keep her well-hydrated.

She should be getting 4-5 fruits or vegetables a day minimum, and grains (rice, wheat, etc.) should be mostly whole grain. If she's not a big vegetable fan (usually this is because the rest of the family isn't eating them either) you can put finely chopped or pureed vegetables into almost any kind of sauce (spaghetti sauce hides many things), and you can try giving her fresh veges and a tasty dip. Baby carrots, olives, jicama and sweet green bell peppers, and fresh mushrooms are usually well received.

Serve more variety and let her pick what she wants. Most kids will naturally select a well-balanced diet if they are only allowed good, healthy choices. Never make a kid eat something they hate (or you'll have yet another battle on your hands).

Don't use chemical laxatives because they can be addictive and really screw up her system. Bananas are constipating (though if eaten with other fruits should not create a problem).

Good luck. Start the habits now and she'll own them for a lifetime.

Answer 3

The one thing you don't want to do is force her, or give her an enema or a suppository. That will make it worse. You can actually hurt the muscles and then she may eventually not be able to hold it in at all. Have you tried the non-flavored fiber additve to her drinks, or give her A LOT of juice to help her go. There are some children that go every other day, but 4 or 5 days may be a bit much. There are a few laxitives out there, but you don't want her body to become dependant on a laxitive for her body to poop. Firstly I would talk to the doctor, have that checked out. If all comes out clear, then move on to the food she eats. Cut out all things that can bind her up then if that doesn't work try the juice, then to the laxitive. Hope this helps & isn't too long. If you have any other questions you can email me. My husband had this problem as a child.

Answer 4

At this age, it's most likely a control issue - she controls when she poops, not you. The bigger deal you make out of it, the more of a battle it's going to be. Spanking is NOT the way to deal with it - or with anything, the only thing that teaches a child is that it's okay to hit someone to make them do what you want them to. It may also be that the longer she waits, the harder it is to go, she's afraid it's going to hurt, and it does, so she's afraid to go the next time. A little prune juice - if she'll take it - my grandma used to sneak it to me mixed with grape juice, or some apple juice will help - remember, "this too shall pass" - no pun intended!

Answer 5

I never would have believed "pooping" was something you had a choice about. I mean, I always thought when you had to go, you had to go. However, I had a nephew a few years ago who had the same problem. I seem to remember that his mother tried some ingenious ways to get him to "go". Like putting a cookie on the table and him on the pot and telling him he couldn't eat it (the cookie) until she saw some evidence in the toilet. Or no TV until the deed was done etc.. The good news is, he soon grew out of it without any apparent damage done.

Answer 6

1. It may hurt to go and she does not want to admit it. You could adjust her diet and not give her foods that cause hard stools (avoid bananas, apple juice). Increasing her fluid intake will help with this too.

2. This may be a control issue. This is one thing in which she is in complete control. Stop mentioning anything to do with her bowel movements for a couple of weeks. Let her go when she asks to. See is there is any improvement.

Good luck with this. This is a hard thing to deal with. You are not the only one who has had to go through this. You may need to get your pediatrician involved very soon if this doesn't improve.

Take care.

Answer 7

I would consider speaking to your pediatrician about this. I think that going 4-5 days in between bowel movements is not normal. It might be that there could be some kind of small blockage? If he says not to worry...then monitor her for another month or so and take her back. I'm sure kids can be stubborn (I have my own little stubborn boy sometimes) but to the point of not having bm's? Hmm... GOOD LUCK!

Answer 8

apple juice and bananas. No milk. No cheese (that might clog her up) Apple juice and bananas will do it!

Cover her veggies with a light coating of olive oil. Get some karo syrup and put it in her apple juice, (that will get them pipes a movin!)

She may also have a seperation thing going on. I know some kids like to hold onto it and dont like to flush because it was "part of them" (sick i know, but it happens). You just have to let them know it is ok to say bye bye and that there will be another coming soon

She might also have IBS or something close to it. Check with the Dr. if it continues to see what s/he recommends.

Good luck!

Answer 9

Kondremel syrup. found in the pharmacy- in a lt. blue n white bottle. my daughter went thu same thing-shes 6 now, but from the day i brought her home from hospital, no poop fow days, sometimes even a week or so. many tests etc. has she been checked for a bowel obstruction? constipation? u can even try the glycerine suppositories 4 her- i know its scary(4 both of u) but suppositories and an enema should do the trick- just dont get her dependent on them. easy does it. good luck.

Answer 10

She's probably holding it in because she knows it's going to hurt when she does go, after always holding it in for so long.

Metamucil tastes pretty good - kind of like Tang. You could put some in her orange juice every morning, and feed her foods containing high fiber and olive oil every day. It might not help this time but, if she has looser and softer stools, she might learn not to be so afraid in the future.