My first child is an academic achiever and my second, though smart and talented, only puts forth moderate effort in school and sports. He is fortunate that with moderate effort he does well anyway. How do you motivate/teach a more laid-back child to put forth his best effort? It's not that I want him to make the same grades as his brother, I just want to see him do his best in whatever he does.
2006-09-11 03:40:42 · 10 answers · asked by lindsay615 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Love your children as individuals. Never compare. Each child is different. Maybe he is doing his best within his capacity. Nurture his effort and encourage him in a positive manner. There are some children that just shine on their own and others need a little push. Maybe his interest does not lie in school and sports maybe he is more of a creative child. Nuture what he loves and what he seems to be interest in. I know you want him to do well in school unless he is failing out and suffering I would not worry too much.
2006-09-11 03:50:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Every child is different. Depending on age, I think depends on what kind of action you should take. If he's youger than 5 I would make a time to sit and have some 'learning time' with him. But don't force him, this will cause the child to really withdrawel from learning (if it's forced) if he gets frustrated, take a break. But if he's older than it needs to be a rule to sit and study (despite if he's got home work or not) a certain amount of time every day (exception maybe being weekends).
As far as sports, not every child likes sports. He may have other interests in arts or music. You just need to figure out what it is that motivates him. Find his interests, it doesn't have to be what his brother likes or does. I would just try to be patient with him and give him options.
2006-09-11 10:47:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your second child will grow up being compaired to his older sibling. He will feel the pressure to fill the older siblings shoes. Make sure he knows you are proud of him. Try having a talk with him about putting 100% effort into everything you do but if he doesn't (and his grades don't suffer) then you just need to let this kid be more laid back.
2006-09-12 07:16:08 · answer #3 · answered by danigrl1212 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a second born and I have 3 boys. Appreciate them both for what they have. Second borns seem more laid back, but they are also good in times of disaster. They are calm and motivated to help. They are friendlier and want to help more than first borns. If each child were the same how special would they feel. Embrace them and you will realize that they excel in different things at different times of their lives.
2006-09-11 10:50:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, stop comparing them. I hated it when my mother kept telling me "why can't you be more like your brother." and my dad kept going on about the grades my cousins achieved. No 2 people are wired up the same way. Pushing him too hard will result in him trying even less. No matter what grade I got in school, my dad thought I could try harder, in the end i gave up trying altogether. It was years before I went to college, but it was when i was old enough to do it for me and not the approval/pride from my parents.
Just be really pleased when he gets good marks and always be proud of them both.
2006-09-11 11:43:53 · answer #5 · answered by serenityredflowers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be proud of BOTH children...our 5 yr old son is GIFTED...and our 2.5 yr old son...we hope gets a football scholarship when he grows up...He's a bit slower at learning things than his brother...BUT he doesn't have to do as much for himself as our 5 yr old did cause he's got his big brother doing things for him!!! Just let him do things on his own course!!
2006-09-11 10:43:36 · answer #6 · answered by just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep encouraging him and let him know he's doing a great job and you are proud.
2006-09-11 11:02:47 · answer #7 · answered by KathyS 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him. Find out what his interests are and try to get him involved with activities he will find rewarding.
2006-09-11 11:06:25 · answer #8 · answered by Tess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is trying he is trying his best.
2006-09-11 11:05:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmmmm....let me think....hmmm....let's seee.....hmmmm...god I dont know, sorry.
2006-09-11 10:46:04 · answer #10 · answered by smokindoggy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋