feeling guilty?

Question

whan i got my dog i thought he would calm down after a few weeks, but he just got worse. jumping up fences, barking all day long, biting scratching just not listening to a word i said!!, and the last straw came when he attacked the dog next door. i thought the best thing was to have him rehomed but im feeling really guilty now hes not here. i feel like the worst person in the world, i just wounded if anyone else has been through this and how did you cope???? thank you

Answer 1

I do understand how ur feeling, u loved him and feel like u let him down, but it sounds like he either had behavioural problems or u just didnt know how to train a dog properly
its not ur fault, but if it was the latter, before u get another dog think hard about how much time u can really give him or contact a training school
my friend had a dog (a big one) that used to jump and claw me evertime i visited, he just wasnt trained properly.
They must be trained cos even a small dog can do a lot of damage to a small child if they jump up and claw.

Answer 2

You've had a horrible experience, but by rehoming him, you made a difficult decision, but one that was right for you, your family and the dog.

That dog now has the chance of living in a home more suitable for his needs, you will (eventually) be less stressed and hopefully your neighbour will see that despite what happened you did the responsible thing.

Where you made the mistake was in taking on a dog that was not suitable for you. How that happened I don't know. Some dogs are easier to cope with than others and it sounds like you got one that needed a more experienced owner.

If you ever do think of taking on another dog, read up a few books about dog training. Maybe you could ask a responsible breeder or rescue to recommend some for you. Ask advice from the breeders and/or rescues directly. If one proves unhelpful, try another.

You sound like someone who tried their best, but failed on that occasion. It happens to the best of us, so don't beat yourself up too much over it. Of course you'll be upset, it's only natural, but remember that you made the right decision.

Answer 3

Please don't give up on your dog, i had the same problems along with two toddlers. My dog attacked my brother in law, a jogger, barked all the time and hated every dog it saw. What worked for me, well, i took my dog to dog training and within three months she won a reward for the most improved and most obedient dog in the class, she now shares a sleeping bag with my brother in law when ever he stays over.

If you dog barks or attacks carry a small water bottle filled a quarter full of little stones and shake it vigorously at your dog for a few seconds then put it away, this must be done everythime and can be done inside the home or during your walks. A small water pistol also helps but i found that she just wanted to play catching the water.

Don't forget the treats if she behaves well !!!!

Answer 4

When we first got married I wittered and wittered my husband to let me have a dog, he kept saying it wasn't fair as we both worked full time and long hours and the dog would be lonely, I eventually talked him round and went out and got the first dog I clapped eyes on, a mongrel puppy, he was so cute and cuddly but he turned into a monster from hell, he would spend hours outside on walks only to come home and pee on the carpet, he destroyed our suite and carpets by chewing them, he was a really fussy eater, he barked constantly and would take on any dog he got his eyes on, it was terrible and I have never been as ashamed in my whole life realising I made the biggest mistake ever by getting a dog, no checking what its mother was like and working full time, it was cruel having a dog at that time in our life, luckily we had a friend on a farm who took to our dog and fell for him, so our dog lived on that farm until his death 10 years ago, we cried over it but we coped by telling ourselves we had done the right thing, just like you have too, your a good person because you realised it wasn't the right thing for you and if you had kept him and it caused more problems how bad would you be feeling then, you did the right thing, honestly.

Answer 5

I've been through it in two ways. I had a very excitable dog that took up residence with us. I was hoping to calm him down with loving care and plenty of time. But, when he jump up and nipped at a child out of foolish excitement (definitely not meanness) I had to take him to the SPCA. The child was fine, just a hairline scratch, but I couldn't allow 'our' dog to hurt anyone.

The second time I was in this situation a neighbors dog, who was known for being mean, attacked my son. Just to let you know, that dog had attacked our dog in our yard twice and a neighbors dog on his own porch and almost killed him. Our son was 5 years old and playing with the dog's owners son. Had I known the dog was out that day (they usually kept him in the house) I would never have let my son go over to their yard. When I heard my son screaming and saw the dog's owner running across the yard with our bleeding son in his arms it was one of the worst things a parent could see. He grabbed my son between the legs and shook him until the owner kicked him off. They had to put the dog down. My son is ok now, he has some scarring between his legs but will always have the memory of that moment.

Don't feel guilty about re-homing an uncontrollable dog. I know you loved him but think of how you would feel if he hurt someone.

Answer 6

Hi,
Definitely don't feel guilty.
On the other side of the coin I adopted a little dog a year ago from a family in a similar situation to yourself they couldn't control her she chewed everything in sight, they didn't have much kitchen door left as she had chewed a hole in it!!! However I found her very receptive to training she is very intelligent and settled with me almost from day one, I don't deny we have had our moments when I have thought to myself 'what have I done', but I couldn't part with her now and love her to pieces and she is getting better and better, I am in contact with the previous owners just to assure them that she is OK. So I wouldn't have my lovely little dog if someone else had been able to cope!
So Don't feel guilty please, you have done the right thing.

Answer 7

Better rehomed than being put down. I assume you know where he's gone. Are you able to visit to confirm he is settling in.
Some dogs do have behaviour problems that are totally untrainable.
You say it attacked another dog good job they didnt complain as under the "dangerous dogs" law it could cause all sorts of aggravation.
Time is a great healer
Ken

Answer 8

You should of watched your breeds to start with as all breeds of dogs have different personalities, instead of being to drastic to start with and getting rid of him without trying there were options, obedience classes, castration and general common sense. You should of been training him from the start not to do that, as a result he knew no different. Maybe you've learnt your lesson now and if you get another dog know what not to do to stop it happening again.

Answer 9

You did not kill the dog, you did the best thing possible ...found him another home.
Try again, with a different breed or a younger dog which will be easier to train and not as excitable.
Lots of us have had to do the same thing at one time. We know how it feels.

Answer 10

Don't feel bad about this. At first, you should know how to take care and understand your dog. Always try to train your dog properly but also in a cheerful and interesting way. Then, the dog will follow you. By the way, sorry for this situation.