As son with an ADHD BOY, 10 years old, diagnosed at 3. He has issues with his impulsivity and learning to read. I am the mean mom, as I make him do things, as my Ex Husband thinks he should play with him, without any type of education. I see that my son will see that Mom pushed him to be the best he can be, as he wants to work for the Navy as an Admiral!
2006-09-10 18:49:31 · 5 answers · asked by Jersey Girl 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I am a Child Adcovate, especially for children with ADHD. I don't spank, as it doesn't work with ADHD CHILDREN, but I love the 1-2-3 Magic, that works, WONDERFULLY! I would reccomend it to anyone around children, with or without any disorder!
Plus, I am an owner of a GREAT YAHOO GROUP, for only Parents/Guardians called www.adhd_boys@yahoogroups.com and if you join just say, I know you from Yahoo Answers and PLEASE do what is stated, as we keep it a very safe haven for parents!
Thanks for everyone compliment on my son, but wanted other opinions, as being a pushy pushy MOM! Isn't that what parents do, PUSH YOU? As, to me, education is VERY IMPORTANT, then when I was a child, as my parents just cared if I did my best and passed. Me, my son knows, that I know HE IS SMART! He told me what he wanted, and now he is 10, time to get that Resume started for the Naval Academy in Maryland. My Fiancee works for the Navy, and so he helps to let me know WHAT is needed. Thanks! :-)
2006-09-10 19:20:55 · update #1
My son also has ADHD he was diagnosed when he was 5 and started school he is 13 now he does and say things with out thinking and he also has a hard time learning and i am also the mean mom my exhusband and i have been divorced for 12 years now he never wanted ta b in our sons life untill he divorced his last wife and now im the bad person when i dont call and let him no ever little thing our son does if it wasnt for me our son wouldnt b where he is now and he also wants ta go into the army and your a great mom for i no that you have to deal with alot on your own and its hard keep up the great work at being a gerat mom
2006-09-10 19:20:40 · answer #1 · answered by Jeannie T 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My son also has sort of the same thing ADD, to be honest with you I think that we all had it as kids, just in today's society there is so much going on in their young minds. I know that everytime that I would get out of line I would get a spanking. Not that I have a problem with that, I am a firm beleiver in spanking one's child. (not abusive though) Well, my little man, also 10, his main problem is that he can go from happy to so angry in such a short amount of time. And when he is mad sometimes he is unconsolable (not sure on spelling there sorry) But in time it will get better. Make sure that you set boundaries and stick to them. If you are having trouble with the father and you seeing eye to eye on discipline, then you need to sit down with him first,
1) address the issue with the child that concerns you and give him an opportunity to tell you what he thinks is his issue too.
2) talk together and see if you can agree on something on how to correct this. Maybe there are some toys that he likes or a bike or something that you can take away from him for not doing the things that he is supposed to do.
3) if you would like to talk to me more one on one on the subject, I would be more than happy to let you knwo what has failed and what has been successfull with me. Please hit the contact me button and I will get an e-mail sent to my yahoo address. I do not use it very often so here is my aim name
cheezhed1121
if you use that in the AIM or AOL software we can chat. Good luck to you. You sound like a very caring mother. Keep working!
2006-09-11 02:08:06 · answer #2 · answered by Stephanie M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cared for a state ward who had ADHD. I was paid big money to look after this young person, he was 15 when he came into my care. He was kicked out of every youth refuge their was and Department of Community Services were desperate to find him safe accommodation, therefore they were prepared to pay top dollars to find a suitable place for him. I live in Australia by the way. His behaviour was so bad, that at the age of 14 his parents had to make him a state ward because they couldnt control his behaviour. He was on medication, which seemed to help him a little bit, but not enough to stablise him...He was a danger to himself as well as others....very violent boy, he stole, he lied, he did everything that labled him a "no-hoper"
His parents, I believed were part of the problem. They were very very strict with him....His illness was all they ever thought about, and they never treated him like a "normal" little boy. He was disciplined for anything a "normal" boy would never have been disciplined for. He spent most of his life in and out of doctors/pshychiatrists offices. In short, my opinion is, he didnt have a life, all he had was ADHD.
Looking after this young boy was the hardest, most challenging thing I have ever had to do, and I dont think I could do it again even if I was paid a million dollars a week. I know there are varying degrees of this illness, but I believe the illness can be made worse by parents being too strict with them. I did a bit of research into this illness, but it is now very vague because I looked after him 20 years ago.
I believe in education as well, but if a child has trouble learning, and is a disruption to the class and has behavioural problems, then I think there are a lot of cases that a parent, even though they are doing it out of love, could possibly be setting that child up to fail.
I am not an expert in this area...I just know what it was like to look after a 15 year old boy with all these massive problems, which I believe were exassibated by his parents need to see him succeed. It wasnt only the parents who didnt have it in them to look after him anymore, it was also his psychiatrist that suggested his home environment was not the best place for him to be.
Your son wants to be an Admiral in the Navy.....while it is possible, very possible because all ADHD children are different, are you sure he has the capabilities to attain these high standards? Or are these high standards your wish for him because you love him.
My hat goes off to any parent who has an ADHD child, you must be made of gold. Just do what you think is best for your child, but also be aware of what his capabilities really are. Please dont set him up to fail because it will have devestating effects on him when he is older.
2006-09-11 04:10:14 · answer #3 · answered by rightio 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Our son's biggest problem was not being able to stay focused on anything long enough for him to take in the information needed to learn it. There was no concentration there when he needed it and this is an important issue especially in younger children. Normally kids are naturally curious and begin absorbing everything around them starting at infancy. Luckily we were able to get him the therapy he needed in the early stages and now he is able to work through any problems that arise on his own.
2006-09-11 02:08:36 · answer #4 · answered by taboobiker73 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep doing what you are doing and take him to a sylvin learning center ASAP.
2006-09-11 01:55:46 · answer #5 · answered by Steve M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋