He's been living off his accumulated salary, but I'm sure that's coming to an end soon. He was diagnosed with depression a few years ago, and is on medication, but not in therapy.
Every time I ask him if he has sent out resumes, he admits he hasn't sent out a single one. When I ask why, he says that he is too afraid to face his situation and the possibility of rejection from potential employers. I have talked with him for hours on end, trying to make suggestions, pleading with him to get help. And yet, he thinks it is up to him to just get his act together. Plus, he is uncomfortable talking about his "flaws" (his words, not mine).
All he does is sleep or play on the internet. If work needs to be done around the house, he takes forever to get around to it. He often doesn't leave the house for days. He's 35, and if this keeps up he'll have to move in with his Dad.
If he avoids everything he fears, including seeking help, what can possibly be done?
2006-09-10 18:47:24 · 9 answers · asked by torreyc73 5 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Also, I think it is important to say that he lives in another state, so I can't be there physically to help him.
2006-09-10 18:48:53 · update #1
theres oviously not much you can do if he keeps running from his fears and wont seek some type of counseling or advice from a professional. its not up to you to save him from this situation. its up to him to save himself....because he has to come to grasp the concept that he needs help. he is running out of money. he maybe needs a transitional job, doing something easy and less stressful and fun. i would advice looking for him a job like that if you wanted to help him. even still hes so depressed i doubt he would actually go to get the job himself or go back to work and be successful. hes drowning in his own misery, and its only gong to get worse. he really needs to get on some type of anti-depressant and seek professional help. it is not your fault there is not much you can do. unless its to just be a good friend and try to make him laugh and do fun stuff with you to get his mind off his depression. the more he does this the better off he will be. but still, its not up to you to help him. he could check himself into a hospital if it is that bad and get mental help for this if he wanted to. good luck. you are a good friend.
2006-09-10 19:04:44 · answer #1 · answered by succubus_angel_666_777 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I believe your friend definitely needs therapy, I hear it is great for depression. A lot of the medication prescribe for depression makes people suicidal so someone needs to constantly check in on him. I know that if he is actually to depressed to work he can probably qualify for some kind social security payments. I think the best thing is to ensure your friend that losing his job was his employers loss and it's time for him to get back in the game and show everyone what he has to offer. Let him know that you believe in him and it's time for him to believe in himself. Be encouraging, be a friend, and most importantly just be there. Hopefully he will find his way out of the dark place he is in..rejection is a terrible thing.
Best of Luck!
2006-09-10 18:49:33 · answer #2 · answered by poetic princess 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find some one who can, He needs someone to turn the computer off. Suggest a temparary or part time job. The thought of fulltime just may be a bit too much for him to do at a time.
2006-09-10 18:56:25 · answer #3 · answered by really???? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is going to end up like a relative of mine from depression and be out of work for years....this person will not seek help and is letting their parent support them...depression is debilitating, as you know and unless the person faces up to the problem...it is going to paralyze the family and him.
2006-09-10 23:09:33 · answer #4 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depression is just feeling defeated, and not confident about any solution. It may also be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain.
Whatever, he needs to overcome it or be miserable til death. Duh!
You wake up ... ok?
Yours,
Jonnie
2006-09-10 19:24:02 · answer #5 · answered by Jonnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this also happened to me back on may 1. i lost my job after 3yrs and hvnt found work since. maybe he loved his job so much like me that a replcement wont do. similar to gf or bf. continue to be his friend
2006-09-10 18:52:58 · answer #6 · answered by Necat T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you should offer to let him move in with you even if you are in another state, also you should offer to do him 'favors' to help cheer him up and maybe he will be less depressed and start searching for work.
2006-09-10 18:54:37 · answer #7 · answered by Chad 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
He has anxiety. I have that too. Lexapro helps.
2006-09-10 21:35:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Loser, It sounds to me that he is not depressed but just a lazy asz.
2006-09-10 18:53:30 · answer #9 · answered by johnwayne 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋