Met a girl who trained me at an old job of mine. Ever since, we'd have deep convos where she'd usually call me, and confide in me about a lot for hours on end. She also would laugh at things I didn't mean to be funny, and was apologetic alot when she didn't need to be. She would also call me up during a holiday and also spent 5 hours on the phone with me the other night, apologizing saying how she had been busy because of her job.
She does have a boyfriend though, that's why I'm not pushing it. They been together for 4 years, but she'll tell me that it's not the greatest, and when she goes over there she makes it sound like its a night job rather than spending time with him. She also says to me that she's faithful.
What is it that's going on......exactly? Is there more to it than can be assumed already? I had already asked her out once for coffee to see her reaction and she said when she could, she'd make time for me
2006-09-10 16:36:35 · 9 answers · asked by axelf57 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You seem to be getting mixed signals! I would say she's interested in you, and you've come along at the same time her relationship with her boyfriend isn't what it once was to her. I would guess she's contemplating breaking up with her boyfriend, but after four years, it's difficult. The long hours she spends talking to you tells me she's quite interested, and the fact that she's apologized several times seems to say she's trying to be aware of your feelings. I'd suggest being her friend (from which a great relationship could evolve), trying to keep things light-hearted for a while, and see what happens. Good luck!!
2006-09-10 16:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by AFL lover 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If things aren't going well with her and her current bf. Allow her time to figure out what it is she wants to do. One shouldn't feel another "out" before they leave there bf. They leave there significant other because they aren't happy. Please don't put yourself in to where "you" are the deciding factor of her leaving him or not. That isn't fair to you. Do you really want someone to leave there current relationship based on you? No you want them to leave, because that is what they want to do. I know that probably doesn't make sense. But I am hoping you understand what it is I am trying to say.
IF then she is single after a period of some time away from her bf. Then maybe try to pursue someone. However happy or not. 4 years IS a long time. Say she isn't happy and this is her comfort zone, comfort zone or not if she was with him for 4 years there is some feelings there and it might be best to give her some space to be able to move on.
Rebounds happen when there is unresolved feelings after a breakup. Even IF she is the one to do the ending of the relationship. I would just hate to see you not have a good chance with one another due to timing. Good Luck to you!
By the way, I know how you feel I'm in the exact same boat right now as you!
2006-09-10 23:46:26 · answer #2 · answered by Pam 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she had a good relationship with her boyfriend she wouldn't be spending so much time talking to your. So there's probably something missing in her life or the guy she's with may be married (married people spend time on holidays with their families not with their girlfriends).
You probably are a really nice guy and that's why she feels comfortable confiding in you. There's a good chance she likes you but doesn't know how to break off her relationship. On the other hand she can be using you to fill the void that her boyfriend cannot fill. That doesn't mean that you need to be her personal therapist. You deserve a relationhip without entaglements.
I suggest that you go out and find a girl who is available. Don't waste your time with her. When she notices that you are no longer available she will probably confront you That 's your opening to tell her how you feel that you like her and you want to go out with her, but not until she breaks up with her boyfriend. If she breaks up with him, that's a different story if she doesn't, her loss.
2006-09-10 23:53:25 · answer #3 · answered by lisa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she just wants a friend. I take it you would like it to be more. In that case, I would be honest with her. You don't want to get too involved and maybe hurt if there is no chance for you, right? Just tell her how you feel. If all she wants is friendship and you are willing to give that and only get that in return, then good. If you are looking for a relationship and she is happy in the one she is in, then it's time to move on and stop wasting your time.
2006-09-10 23:44:07 · answer #4 · answered by buddhafuldreamer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like the one thats confused is her. I think she does like you but wants to be faithful to her boyfriend; she might be going through a rough patch with her boyfriend and whenever that happens she reaches out to you.
Think about this...Do you like her? if you do and what to see where this goes, I would suggest you let her decide what she wants to do about her boyfriend first. Don't be the one to make her break up (meaning don't let her be unfaithful to her boyfriend with you)...trust me, if she breaks up because of you and then starts going out with you, she will go back to the other guy or easily break up with you once the guilt settles in.
Let things follow their course, and once things are clear act on them.
Good luck!
2006-09-10 23:43:39 · answer #5 · answered by White 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay you need to ask her out again give her a few days till the day but yeah this one is ready for you to take things on. if not what do you have to lose long phone converstaions with a girl who wont go out with you not a big loss
2006-09-10 23:39:56 · answer #6 · answered by gsschulte 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may be seen if you are interested before dumping her man. I think she is trying to feel you out for now to make a decision later on.
2006-09-10 23:38:49 · answer #7 · answered by Contesta 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that she really likes you and is probably contemplating leaving her boyfriend for you. Just be patient because.
2006-09-10 23:41:19 · answer #8 · answered by wentdownkickin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like she likes u :) but i also think that she is very unsure of what to do
2006-09-10 23:40:30 · answer #9 · answered by bara_kiri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋