Here's my problem...
I have been dating my boyfriend for a year and a half and I am finally meeting his parents (they live across the country).
My parents want to invite them over for dinner because my boyfriend has become like a second son to them.
However, he lives with his AWFUL older sister who is possibly the meanest person on earth. She despises me for no reason. She's thrown a can of soda at me (and she's 25 people!), talks poorly of me to his parents, never thanks me for the things I do for her, and never aknowledges my prescence.
Should I invite the sister to the dinner because it's the polite thing to do or should I just invite the parents?
Thoughtful advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you!!
2006-09-10 11:56:14 · 16 answers · asked by cutiewithabooooty 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Invite the sister also - that's the classy move. Then, you can impress his parents even more when you show how much more mature you are then she is.
Just remember to keep your cool if you do invite her and she pulls her little act.
You have a golden opportunity to score major points with all the people involved - you should exploit it.
2006-09-10 12:00:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
My first instinct thinks you should just invite the Parents..Is the Sister "in town" or something? I mean, are they all traveling to your area right now--the Parents and the Sister?
If the Sister is not travelling out of state with the Parents--like if she lives in your area, but the Parents are here out of town--I would just invite the Parents. You never get a 2nd chance to make a first impression--and you dont want that girl embarrasing you or making a scene. You need to have a comfortable, pleasant evening--and that will also give you all time to "Bond"..Why dont you have 1 dinner at home with just the Parents, then all meet out for lunch before they leave--and THEN you can invite The Sister.
I think that wouldnt be rude at alll. Just tell them its dinner for The Parents..and invite her for lunch with the Parents in a few days--then she can act like an as$.
Peace
2006-09-10 19:22:55 · answer #2 · answered by Plus-Sized &Proud 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it doesn't sound like she should expect an invitation after her treatment of you. It also sounds like she could ruin what would otherwise be a nice evening. I would just invite the parents. Say it's a dinner for your parents and her parents to meet each other. It might be advisable to discuss this with your boyfriend first though. Find out if he thinks his parents would be offended if she weren't invited. If she does come and she tries to make you look bad in front of her parents, take the high road. Be nice, be polite, don't let her get to you or at least don't show it. Her parents will notice who's misbehaving and who isn't. That might help clear up any little misconceptions that they may have due to her complaints to them about you. Personally, I think she sounds jealous of her brothers affection for you.
2006-09-10 19:30:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. If it was anyone outside of the family, I would say forget it, don't bother with inviting someone that is going to make the already awkward situation worse for you. But this is his sister & she's going to be in his life. If you don't invite her it will give her more ammunition to not like you. However, this dinner is really about your parents meeting his parents & your relationship...which doesn't involve her. When my husband & I were dating we had a dinner so our parents could meet, none of the siblings were invited. I would assume that your boyfriend understands & sees how his sister acts towards you. Maybe you should ask him his opinion on the situation?
2006-09-10 19:03:46 · answer #4 · answered by BettyBoop 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Strictly speaking, it sounds like your parents want to meet his parents, not his sister. If the sister hates you that much, she probably won't want to come anyway, especially if you can schedule the dinner on a night when she's not available (which will give her an excuse to decline your invitation).
2006-09-10 19:17:56 · answer #5 · answered by spunk113 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just invite the parents. Not everyone is required to like us (as this person proves), but we are not required to put up with people who disrespect us or cause us grief. It is YOUR life, baby, so make it count! Live it as you please and nourish the positive relationships you have, without allowing someone else to spoil a perfectly good occasion! Good luck to you. sister! I hope all goes well for you now and in the future. Set some boundaries, it's a good thing!
2006-09-10 19:02:09 · answer #6 · answered by Cub6265 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see your dilemma. If you don't invite the ugly sister, the parents may be offended. The root of the sister's rude behavior, I am sure is jealousy. Invite the ugly sister. I am betting she won't pitch a fit in front of both your parents. Good luck.
2006-09-10 19:03:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not invite her. This dinner is to let your parents get to know his and the sister has no place there.
Also, I would consider talking to your boyfriend about his sister's lack of class. She has no right to treat you that way and it's about time your boyfriend stick up for you.
2006-09-11 16:32:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would very easy not to invite her, she sounds terrible!I think you should invite her and be as nice as you can to her. That way you will never be in the wrong and hopefully shame her into behaving better towards you.She is obviously overly protective of her brother.
2006-09-10 19:05:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Invite them all... If this sister is as bad as you say she is it'd be interesting to see how she acts surrounded by adults in a social setting. Fact is you don't have to like her nor she you, but you owe it to others and yourselves to remain civil to one another.
Ask her flat out if she likes you, and if not, Why?
Good Luck
2006-09-10 20:47:42 · answer #10 · answered by Joshua Pettigrew 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋