My daughter usually won't play with other kids...?

Question

Whenever we are at an event, or say a birthday party, my daughter won't go play with other kids. Even at her own birthday party last year, she hung around with a few trusted adults. I thought maybe it was because I was there, so I've tried leaving her at parties, and the Mom of the kid whose birthday it is usually tells me that my daughter hung out with her instead of the kids. Even at her Brownie meetings, she'll sit at the table by me instead of going to play with the other kids. Kids like her and when we are out kids are always calling out to her, so it's not that she's unpopular or something. Does anyone else have a kid like this? I want her to have friends, so it does concern me. Of course I want what's best for her. I understand some kids are naturally loners, but I don't want her to be lonely. By the way, she's 6 years old, will turn 7 in a couple of months.

She's also enrolled in dance and karate and does well with these activities. In fact she's pretty confident at them, I'm just not sure she's as confident with other social situations. Does anyone have any tips to help her be more sociable, or should I just not worry about it for now?

Some of you do have a point, in some areas she is very intelligent, and I think if our school had an accelerated learner program she would qualify.

Oh, and yes, she is an only child.

Colleen O, the reason I put that she's an only child is because someone asked, and it is pertinent to the question. Don't judge me, I love and accept my child for who she is, I would never force her to be someone she isn't. Like most Mom's I want what's best for my child. She has a quirky, zany, sweet personality that I love. I just don't want her to be lonely. Try not to be so judgemental, no where in my question did I say I want to change who she is!

Answer 1

well im only 14 but i deal with children all of the time i have 6 younger siblings,2 of them are twins chari and chani chani is more of the socialite(btw they are 6) and chari likes to be with adults because she has more of a mature mind for her age she accels in school and shes in ju-jitsu and shes in the accelerated readers program and she is up to about an 8th grade level. she does not like other children to be with her and stuff she likes to hagn otu with adults as ive said and have maturerer conversatoins so maybe your daughter shold be around older children who are on her brain span.

Answer 2

do you have any friend's with kids? maybe you can set up a few play-dates for her. she's seven, she will grow up and get friends on her own eventually, try sending her to school with some neat things to do or show that other kid's would think is cool. :) don't try changing up her hair or anything. ask her how she wants it, take her shopping and see what she likes! she may only be seven , but she seems mature enough to choose her likes and dislikes. put her in sports, it's always a good way to meet new people. even if she isn't very athletic, i'm not either so don't feel bad. you can even try taking her to some art classes with girl's her age. :) good luck!

Answer 3

You don't mention if she is an only child. Very often they prefer the company of adults to that of children, normally because they have a more extensive vocabulary.

My son was the same until he was about 10, and even now at 13 finds it easier to talk to adults

Answer 4

I was a kid liked that.Until now, i like sometimes to be all alone but I still have my friends.Look ,the first thing you have to do is to check any possibilities if other kids make your daughter's life atrue hell and she doesn't want to make any friends causeof that.Then you should talk to your child and tell her how nicely you pass your time with your own friends and when you were at her age you had many friends.visit any of her cousin's wo are nearly in her age so that she will be able to make their relatives friends. Good luck

Answer 5

Being an only child has nothing to do with it. My daughter is an only child and she was and still is a part of groups with her peers. Some kids are "loners" and prefer to be by themselves in social situations. She's not "lonely" obviously, she is well liked and I'm sure interacts with children she knows when SHE wants to. Leave her alone she is fine, quit trying to force her to fit YOUR expectations of the type of child she should be and let her be a child.

Answer 6

Your daughter sounds like mine. She's shy and relates better with grown-ups. I have four children and my two girls had this issue but have grown out of it upon starting school. If your baby girl hasn't really been around other kids her age it'll take some time for her to get used to other children. My kids didn't have much exposure to playtime with other kids, they were ususally around grown-ups and that is exactly how they acted. She'll be fine once she starts school.

Answer 7

Maybe try counseling. I know she's not mentally ill or anything, but if you are truly concerned, try it. A counselor can help her learn new skills and find out if she has any issues or worries that keep her from socializing. She'll thank you when she's older.

Answer 8

Yes my son is just like that,She may just be shy.Just tell her that playing with the other children is a fun thing and that playing by yourself is less fun.Try and do activities with her and other kids.I hope it works out for you.

Answer 9

Mybe she's just more mature than the other kids, and doesn't relate to them. Have you considered getting her tested for gifted education programs?

Answer 10

well that's not good