Situation: You two are argueing because you saw him hugging some girl you didn't know, but later found out that she was one of his friends, and you pushed him and yelled at him. Then, he yells at you for being stupid, embarassing him in front of his friends, yelling at him, making a huge scene, crying, and he slaps you! Then, he cries for laying his hand on you, and you are confused.
Question: Should you still be with him? And forgive him?
2006-09-10 07:58:35 · 20 answers · asked by bratworth 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A man should NEVER violate or physically hurt a lady. Leave him immedietly.
2006-09-10 08:00:39 · answer #1 · answered by ansem7 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Even though you may have overreacted to the situation, there is no excuse for someone hitting you unless it is in self deffense. I have been through a similar situation before and thought it would be okay to forgive and forget about it.
It may never happen again durring the time that you are together but the truth is that his anger and temper do not just come up out of nowhere and then dissapear for good.
For me personally, it started out with verbal abuse; later on I was being pushed aside whenever the aurguments started to heat up. Eventually I was thrown across the room and in shock that someone would actually do this to me. There is no amount of love and devotion that can fix this problem. He needs to be the one to step back and recognize that he needs to fix it by figuring out what trigures him and getting out of that situation.
I stayed in my relationship for 3 years thinking that I could "fix him". I wanted to believe that he would never lay a hand on me again. I thought I knew the guy but it turns out that some people have a side to them that they cannot control and niether can you.
I reccomend leaving before it's too late. If he really does love you then he will be understanding of your concern for your safety and he will do whatever he needs to in order for you to see that he has changed. If you decide to get back together with him later on after he has been to counseling, therapy, ect. then I don't see anything wrong with that.
The main thing you must do is realize how much you love yourself and that no one deserves to be treated like that.
2006-09-10 15:22:02 · answer #2 · answered by luckysvn_7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, you have to move on. don't be fooled.
1) i'm betting he's was just trying to make you feel like you are crazy by making you feel like you were being psycho about the girl. trust your intuition!
2) im betting that girl was more to him than a friend (guys dont actually maintain friendships with girls they dont find attractive, whether they intend to act on it ever or not)
3) no one ever ever has a good reason to slap you. no matter what you do--never ever let someone physically put their hands on you. no matter how you reacted or whether you were wrong.
4) how you feel has to be more important to him than what his friends think.
5) abusers always cry and treat you like a queen after they abuse you--its all part of the cycle and isn't any indication that they won't do it again. he will do it again. its a passive aggressive thing they do to make it so that they are the fragile one who you have to be treat gently, instead of the other way around.
i'm sorry, i'm sure it's confusing and that you love him, you may even think that he loves you. but i can tell you from experience
RUN!!
2006-09-10 15:05:45 · answer #3 · answered by Eos 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you need to take some time apart and re-evaluate the situation. It may work and it may have only been a one time thing... but on the other hand it could be something that hes upset about but will do again if the situation arises. Take some time apart and tell him why. Dont totally push him out of your life... but work on it... Good Luck. And dont let any man Ever Lay a hand on you!
2006-09-10 15:01:24 · answer #4 · answered by ashley65@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
call off the relationship and wait until you are older to get into a relationship.
you were jealous because of your guy hugging another girl and treated him violently. this is not a mature action and guys do not like being with girls who are so overly-jealous of other girls. he also acted violently by smacking you; you have to worry that this might be a more common action in the future.
you need to realize not all girls are competition and he needs to realize it is never right to hit a girl.. it might take losing a girlfriend to make him realize that.
you both acted immaturely and should not be in a relationship right now. focus on school studies and hobbies and take a break from dating for a few years.
2006-09-10 15:07:40 · answer #5 · answered by .jess 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should still be with him. You did over react with him hugging his friend. Maybe she was someone who he hasn't seen for awhile. I mean it all depends on the situation. But he shouldn't have yelled at you or hit you. That's just not right. If he continues to be abusive, you should leave him.
2006-09-10 15:01:40 · answer #6 · answered by SimpleGurl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well if you forgive him...it better be his last time he ever lays a finger on you...and you have to let him know that...ask yourself if he looks like the type that would become abusive later on...i guess just control yourself next time...talk to him beofre accusing him like that...guys hate that...good luck chicka
2006-09-10 15:05:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think you should apologize for over reacting and then also to his friends! He apologizes for slapping you and you learn to not over react but to see what is up before yo do react! I think you face the embarrassment and then move on! Tell him that you won't act without choosing trust in him first. Sounds like you both messed up, but you can save your relationship just face up to what you did wrong and except his mistake also!
2006-09-10 15:04:00 · answer #8 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, if you guys trusted each other this would not have happened. You obviously have no trust in him if you automatically assumed he was up to no good.
If you stay together, go to therapy! You have what sounds like a very unhealthy relationship.
2006-09-10 15:01:14 · answer #9 · answered by Nikki T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Slapping is not cool. I get jealous too, but hugging, it's just better if you don't make a big deal out of it. Forgive him just once, the second time no way.
2006-09-10 15:01:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋