Do I belong in a psychiatric hospital?

Question

Things were not going well overall today, so when I went to get lunch, I bought a lunch entirely of things that were bad for me (sodium, diet soda, cholesterol, etc) PURPOSELY, just, I think, to say f-- you to the world and to God, "don't treat me this way, you won't get away with it and you won't, if I have anything to do with it, have me to kick around anymore." What gets me really worried is that I have done this numerous times in the past when things have not gone well. I also have never come to terms with past happy memories. I feel they have all gone by too fast, I have been robbed of them, and the present is mostly only bullshit, with no future!!!

Thanks for all the great answers. What I may not have made clear regarding food abuse is that it's not the volume of the food or the act of eating that I need, its the potentially harmful chemicals in some foods that I need. I eat the carcinogens, and sodium etc, only because a part of me really hopes to harm/poison myself by doing it. It is my way of trying to take poison, I guess...also, I think, to try to alarm others so that some store mgr at some point will see a pattern and call the police re suicide attempts, and I can then have someone to talk to. Maybe I want to be hospitalized, at this point I feel so confused, depressed, and alone, that I just don't know. I just know that I have a need to keep poisoning myself..

Answer 1

It must really suck to be you.

Answer 2

That's a sorry place to find yourself and believe me, I've been there a few times.

Life has a constant flow to it, things and people come and go. Trying to hold onto something you still have is what makes it special, trying to hold on to what has already gone will only cause you pain and confusion.

Treasure your memories of happy times as nobody can take them from you. The here and now lasts only for an instant, afterwards there is something else.

Where you are now is the sum total of everything that has happened before. Where you go from now is entirely up to you. Even though right now you might feel powerless to change your existence, it's not the case.

Some people find their sanctuary in silence and thought, others in interaction with friends or places. Yours will come in time, as impossible or unlikely as it may seem right now.

If you have a trusted friend, maybe you could tell them how you're feeling. If you can't say it, you could write it down. If they care, they'll do everything they can to help.

There are things that can make it easier for here and now. If you feel like you're in the passenger seat and not like you're driving, there are ways to regain control. If you feel bad by agreeing to unreasonable requests, try explaining why it feels unreasonable. Beware though, that shouting achieves nothing.

If your feelings have been this way for some time, it might point towards a chemical imbalance in your brain. Many more people suffer from this than you'd realise and the answer may be a lot simpler than you'd think.

There is a flower called St John's Wort. It contains a couple of natural chemicals that can bring the chemistry back into balance. There's plenty of things online and on wikipedia. I've included a couple of links, what you do with them is up to you. It worked well for me.

Hope that makes things a little easier,
froggie

Answer 3

Ok, so diet soda is all that bad? Most sodas are bad but ok in moderation. Most foods do have some sodium and cholesterol unless you are eating salad with no dressing. I don't know how to think of that. I mean if you are downing milkshakes and cakes and chips like crazy every time something went wrong or spending every dollar you had, then there would be a big problem. Obviously you know you have some problem, but maybe it is not with or about the food. Everyone has problems and everyone has the right to seek help for them. Yes, counseling to help you would be good, but a hospital probably is not where you would need or want to really be.

Answer 4

God, I feel the same way. Sometime I wish I could go hide out in mental hospital. Not have to work, have someone else cook my 3 squares everyday, watch tv and play board games with other people in white robes. That does sound alot better. I fight this gnawing feeling of just trying to survive - the future seems bleak. The things I want to do - I can't because there is no money.... I'm smart but I'm stuck in a job where I don't use my brain...Life does seem like a lot of b-llsh-t most of the time... Sometimes I might drink and party - but the party ends and it's back to the daily grind.... I wonder - sometimes there is this glimmer of hope - but then the light moves and it goes away....

I think alot of people feel this way from time to time - but they don't talk about it. I can put on a smile and a cheery demeanor any time I want...No body really knows. I have to work really hard to get my self out of this funky place - it doesn't seem like it's worth the effort sometimes.

Anyway, I know how you feel.

Answer 5

First, it is perfectly normal for us to try and do something damaging when we are feeling crappy. A lot of people turn to drugs, some food, some reckless sex, all kinds of things. That's perfectly normal. It's how we cope. Sometimes I feel like doing something reckless when I am pissed off just because it feels good to think about it.

Past happy memories are just that - past happy memories. A memory is a snapshot of a moment in time and they can't last forever. When you go thru crappy things, that makes the happier times even more sweet.

I don't think u need a psychiatric hospital, but you might consider seeing a therapist to help deal with your depression. Not a psychaitrist - a therapist. If you find a good one, it will help you immensely! Best of luck to you...take care

Answer 6

If eating a "bad" lunch is a bad as it gets then no you needn't be hospitalized....however, you are having trouble with your mood. I think you could start with counseling and perhaps ask a psychiatrist to evaluate you for possible depression. Sometimes a little pill will help you to see things in a better light and will help you gain some perspective. Being mentally ill is not a crime and it's really just a chemical imbalance. If you go to Barnes and Noble and go to the self-help section there are tons of books about mood disorders and ways to help you think better thoughts. Good luck, God Bless and remember, 'this too shall pass!'

Answer 7

I'm going to give you a pretty controversial answer. Thank goodness this isn't a forum and I won't have to listen to everybody bashing me for what I'm about to say. But anyway.

I'm an ER nurse and we have people constantly coming in wanting medical attention for personal or psychiatric problems. They do things like cut on themselves to get other people to talk them into coming in etc. etc. etc.

Medical treatment and psychiatric admissions obviously do not help, because we've had the same people coming back month after month and year after year.

Forget medical treatment and try to find peace other ways. Find a good religion to study (Buddhism is great for depressed people and does not go against Christian beliefs, believe it or not). Christianity is good to study, too, if you find the right people, but you have to be careful because there are a lot of hypocrits out there.

The reason I recommend religious study is because religious people, in general (excluding the hypocrits), are more willing to befriend you and communicate with you - and clergy make excellent counselors.

You're not depressed because you have a shortage of antidepressants in your body or because you haven't spent enough time in a psych. unit. You're depressed because you have emotional and spiritual needs which aren't being met. Treat the cause.

I wish you the best.

Answer 8

NO you don't.

And I doubt you have to see a therapist.

Like so many people eat more when under stress, what's the big deal? I usually gain a pound during examtimes.

And you know about so many people who chew their nails, or go on a shopping binge.

Anger at "god" is a perfectly justified and understandable response, when you want to make someone else the scapegoat, and don't want you to be it, so you get yourself an imaginary entity to blame for things going wrong, jst as you use imaginary number "i" in various problems to take care of mathematics.

And I agree with you here, good times always go by too fast, and times seems to stop when you are in trouble, prolonging the misery. Only you can't stop hoping, and working .

Answer 9

everyone on the planet struggles with problems in their life. What you may be lacking is good ways to cope with them. Like most of the other answers I would recommend a therapist if you can afford it. Many large cities have help for people without funds. A really good friend does wonders for being able to work through problems in life. From your perspective you may just not be able to see all the options available to you but they are out there. And there is a lot of help out there due to the fact that everyone struggles with the same problems.

Answer 10

No, not a hospital. You might benefit from counseling, though, since you sound depressed. It's like suicide, but not as extreme. Suicide by food takes a long time. You're lashing out at the world by hurting yourself. Please talk to your parents, or to a school counselor. Things never stay as bad as they might seem at the moment, and you'll have more happy events in your life. Learn to store up your happy memories as you make them. You have a very large future, with unlimited potential, when you think about it.

Answer 11

Sounds like even when things are going well, you don't stop and really enjoy them. Dwelling on negative things will keep you in deep depression. The difference between those who seem to be happy and those who are always sad, is what they allow themselves to ponder all the time. Those who are happy CHOOSE not to allow someone else or something else to make them unhappy or cause them to give up. They can switch channels in the mind from sad events to thinking of (for instance) a day on the shore picking up sea shells. Telling and listening to jokes and laughing is the best medicine.