I've met several women over the last 5 years who initially told me they were interested in being friends (with benefits) only. But after 6-12 months they began to push for a more permanent relationship, even marriage. This has happened so often that I'm beginning to think that the term "friends with benefits" really means: "go back, it's a trap".
I honestly don't like to deceive anyone, especially when a physical relationship is involved, and agree to the friends with benefits concept thinking that I am being fair and honest. But when they realize that "I" really meant it, it winds up hurting them. Any similar experiences out there?
2006-09-10 06:18:13 · 11 answers · asked by michael m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Looking at the answers, my question wasn't really clear. I DO tell them up front that I don't want a permanent relationship. They tell me the same, but decide later they want it to be permanent.
2006-09-10 06:23:23 · update #1
I think the initial intention is the "friends with benefit" thing, but women, i am sorry, are more emotionally driven. Men can do that sort of thing, but women only think they can. Go back, it's a trap that no one knows is there!
2006-09-10 06:25:05 · answer #1 · answered by denny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people just get attached. I had the same issue with a guy. I never had any personal interests in him relationship wise. We had this big old talk so things didn't wind up awkward. What a joke! He got totally torked when I found someone I actually wanted to be with. I personally think that in most cases it is just a bad idea. I've heard of it working. But I hear a lot more cases of one side or the other getting hurt over it because one lets their feelings go too far.
2006-09-10 13:29:00 · answer #2 · answered by ♥N,K,E&DJ'§ Mommy♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends with benefits is dangerous. It can be a good place to start a relationship, but make no mistakes. It IS the start of a relationship.
That doesn't mean you should totally steer clear of the offer. Just make sure before you enter into one of these relationships you like the woman enough to eventually commit to something more.
2006-09-10 13:22:53 · answer #3 · answered by Akfek_Branford 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I say it, I mean it.
I can understand why you think it is a game with some women. What they are doing is not fair.
Tell them in the very beginning that it will never be serious...let them know what they are getting into....then if they want to persure the relationship, you have nothing to feel guilty for when you decide to end it.
2006-09-10 13:21:49 · answer #4 · answered by shortfrog 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women start out with good
Intentions;however, women have an emotional bonding mechanism
Inside them called 'oxytocin' a hormone that causes them to bond to you emotionally and want more than "Friends with Benefits." It's not something they can control like a man who does not bond. They do not know they can't control this until it happens to them.
2013-12-16 08:19:52 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They mean you become the friend... and they get all the benefits
2006-09-10 13:22:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means they don't want to be tyed down to only you. It's just a friendly hook-up.
2006-09-10 13:19:34 · answer #7 · answered by kvsmiller 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before starting, tell them what you're really up to.
2006-09-10 13:21:02 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ Karen ♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That means they wanna have a good f**k whenever it's convenient.
2006-09-10 13:22:28 · answer #9 · answered by pizzasjedi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just enjoy while you can.
2006-09-10 13:19:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋