My fiance lost his cat to cancer 3weeks ago. It was very hard and painful for the both of us. He had her for 13yrs. and they were the best of friends. He says he doesn't want another cat box in this house but he is missing the affection of a soft furry buddy. I don't want to upset him but I hate seeing him like this.
2006-09-10 03:49:54 · 12 answers · asked by MellyK1234 3 in Pets ➔ Cats
I'm sure he'll want a new cat eventually because he had a special relationship with his for so long. But please, don't rush him into it until he's ready - he'll only resent the new cat. He needs time to grieve first.
2006-09-10 03:53:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he loved his pet for 13 years, there was no way he would have even thought to get rid of her because of a litter box. I think he's just using the litter box as an excuse. He may be afraid of feeling the hurt of losing a pet again. I'm sure if you brought home a new furry buddy he would be thrilled. We all love our pets despite the work involved, they are so worth it! We lost our little dog 3 weeks ago also. She died of heart failure, and we had her for 12 years. I know how much it hurts. We still have our two cats, but I'll probably get another dog someday.
2006-09-10 11:29:17 · answer #2 · answered by Starscape 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When my Rusty died I was heartbroken and while I knew I needed a feline presence in my life, I was nowhere near ready to adopt another kitty. But Rusty wasn't even back from the crematorium when his doctor called about a feral rescue that couldn't be released after neutering because he needed follow up on an eye injury.
I said I'd meet him and consider fostering him. I loved him the minute we met and I took him home to his forever home the same day I got Rusty's cremains back.
I wasn't ready, and in a way I'm still not ready, but I'm SO glad I adopted Scamper! He has brought me much joy at a time of great sorrow.
Your fiancee might respond the same way, but he might not. He might also prefer to pick out his own next cat.
Maybe you could arrange for a cat to come into his life. But if you do, make sure you have the option of returning it if he really won't go along.
Or maybe you could get him to visit a shelter with you, with no commitment to adopt, and see if he can leave without a cat...
2006-09-10 12:15:38 · answer #3 · answered by Mick 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your bf needs time to grieve and will know when he is ready for another cat.
If you have a visitor-friendly humane society tell him you want to visit and look at the animals -- say in the spring. If it is a 'no-kill' shelter it can be a fun experience for both of you. There are always many homeless cats and kittens to visit with and get to know.
In my ten years of doing shelter adoptions so many times I have seen a cat and human connect and bond almost instantaneously.
I do thing the cat picks out their owner and it's a joy to see.
It's important that he have the opportunity to have this experience so don't get another cat to "surprise" him.
2006-09-10 11:19:04 · answer #4 · answered by old cat lady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO... I know you mean well, but your fiancee needs time to grieve. Loosing a beloved pet is like loosing a child. If you get him another one now, before he is ready, he might just resent the new pet for simple reason that it is alive while his beloved cat is dead... Only TIME will heal the hurt and grief... when he is ready, he will know it and either look for another himself or the angels will send him one with his name on it (that's what happened to me). The best thing for you to do now is just be there for him. You cannot RUSH him into getting over the death of his pet.
2006-09-10 11:17:25 · answer #5 · answered by Phoebhart 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Although you have the best intentions in mind, I would wait a little while to get him a new pet. He needs time to go through the grieving process. If you really want to get him a new pet, talk to him and find out how he really feels about the prospect of a new loved one.
2006-09-10 10:58:39 · answer #6 · answered by Pixie31 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, he needs to feel for himself that it's time. Let him mourn, it's been only three weeks. I've had seven dogs now, and more than once I thought maybe no more... but when the time is right (and it's never very long, really), I get a new dog.
2006-09-10 10:56:37 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your loss. This is a very hard time for both of you. Your BF needs time to grieve. Cats are unique creatures. One will find you when the time is right.
Good luck & God Bless you for your compassion.
2006-09-10 11:32:55 · answer #8 · answered by BETTY ROCKER 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should although its up to you if you want to get a kitten or a cat. My cousin she has a cat thats 19 years old if i am right which i think i am. She's very old!
2006-09-10 11:47:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Does he like dogs at all? Maybe get him a puppy - not the same as a cat, so there wouldn't be issues with that, and who can't resist a puppy?
2006-09-10 10:55:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋