an old lady I know has just had her beloved cat put to sleep, I'd like to get her another one?

Question

do you think this is a good idea, my partner says not

Answer 1

suggest to her that you take her to the rspca or a cat home to choose another and see what she says, if she agrees you can make a donation for the cat- that would be a nice gesture

Answer 2

A kind thought, but don't just give her a cat without preparation - let her decide if & when she wants another cat. As she is old, give some thought to what would happen to the cat if she became ill, or had to go into accommodation where she couldn't take the cat. Would you & your partner be prepared to look after the cat? The kindest thing you can do for her at present is simply to be there for her - give her some company, & show you understand her grief about the cat. If & when she indicates that she would like another cat, then help her; bring her to animal shelters, etc. If she is going to get another cat she may need help with bringing cat food & litter home, as these items are heavy. Would you be prepared to help her with that? As you see, several points to consider. You are obviously a caring person, so I am sure your instincts will guide you. Good luck.

Answer 3

NO! My childhood cat passed away while I was deployed to the Middle East, she was 14. I wanted to clone her, have her ovaries frozen, you name it! It all sounds so crazy to me now, but at the time, that was what I was thinking. Getting another cat was NOT an option. I now have another and love her to no end, but it took 3 years before I "found" her. I went into a store, and was holding 2 different kittens. She was the one that looked up at me and mewed so small, and so sweetly. The other kittens just wanted to act like monkeys and play. Your friend will need time to get over her loss, and then SHE needs to decide on another cat. I always thought I'd get a dog. Plus, if she's really old, is a kitten going to be too much for her? Would a good, older, calmer cat from the pound be better? Perhaps one that is older, but still young so they'll be around for a while whould be ok. Who's going to pay for all the initial vet costs? When you get a new cat, you have to make sure everything is good with them. Then if this cat dies, she'll be even more upset. Just wait at least a year, and look for clues that she even wants another pet.

Answer 4

She may not want the responsibility of a new pet at her age. Although she probably loved it to bits it may still have been a burden on her. Talk to her. Maybe, if she's up to it, an older cat might suit her or perhaps if she just misses the company but doesn't like the idea of leaving her pet behind when she herself goes, she might consider fostering a cat that may even have come from a home of someone of her own ilk that she would be helping out whilst they are in hospital. I believe the fosterer is helped with the costs and receives free veterinary care for the pet in her care. That could be a better option if money is tight but she is physically and mentally able to cope with another animal.

Answer 5

i would suggest going to an animal shelter .... there are many to choose from and if it's a quality shelter ( clean cages, and a good staff ) your chances are pretty good to find a good cat for her, an older male cat that has been fixed would be a good choice as i worked at an animal shelter for quite a while and found that the male cats are much more attentive and good tempermate .... some shelters will give the elderly a discount on an animal no b.s. .. i don't believe a kitten would be apporiate as you won't really know the personality of the animal for some time...many times when people give up their cats for such silly/stupid reasons, and the shelter usually has a record on the history of the pet provided by the owner... don't just bring one home for her but, rather take the old lady with ya and plan on spending some time to make a good decision...i personally believe that the old lady has a "hole in her life " that needs to be filled !!!.......... good luck !!

Answer 6

I know your sentiments.
It is a proven fact that people with pets live longer and healthier lives (especially the elderly) so your wanting to get her another companion shows how much you love her.
The thing is your partner may be right. She needs time to grieve. I'd suggest spending a bit extra time with her right now, and then in a few days or weeks take her out shopping and somehow "end up" looking in a pet store -- let her play with the pets there and then maybe ask her if she would like another kitten/cat... I am sure that when she is ready you will know it.

Answer 7

Don't get her one as a surprise. She may not want another car. If she was very close to the cat she has had put to sleep she will be in mouring for it and not ready to accept another one just now. If she is very elderly then an older cat would be better than an active kitten which she could trip over and hurt herself, plus it may outlive her. The cat's protection league has thousands of lovely older cats just waiting for a quiet home with an older person. Before you do anything, speak to the lady and ask her if she actually wants another cat.If and when she does, offer to take her round to some cat shelters so that she can choose her own. In February I lost one of my dogs to a brain haemmorhage. I was devastated. If my son had gone out and got me a puppy it would not have been welcome as I needed time to grieve for my beautiful 'Kip'. Later on, I would still have not been happy as choosing a pet is a very personal thing. Eventually I went out to a rescue centre and chose a 6 months old, very very wild young German shepherd dog. It has taken some 4 months for him to settle down with me and I'm very attached to him, but still nowhere near what I felt for my 'Kip' who is buried right benteath my living room window so that I can see his grave every morning when I open my curtains.

Answer 8

If the dear old lady was very very attached to her cat, she will be in deep grief right now. Some people in her position may want another pet right away to replace the beloved gone away to kitty heaven, but some (like me) will need time and space to grieve. The old lady might actually resent other kitties for being ALIVE when her beloved is dead - sounds crazy, but who can account for the range of human emotions? She might be so wrought with grief and the effort to get over it that she does not have energy to spare in taking care of a new pet. When my beloved Pezza passed away, I felt desperate sorrow and dreamt of him night after night. I actually looked forward to these dreams where I at least was still able to carry Pezza in my arms. Gradually, I healed - but I never sought for another cat. Rather, another cat - my now beloved Kaffe - sought me out and adopted me. He just literally walked into my study from the great outdoors (he was less than 6 months old at the time) and snuggled at my feet. I was his and he was mine from that day on.

You are obviously a warm and caring person - wish there were more like you. My suggestion is for you to "fellowship" with the old lady; let her know how much you "feel" for her; allow her to talk out her sorrow; and ascertain how she would feel about another kitty. Don't just "surprise" her with one.

Answer 9

Maybe not to soon after the first one was put down, as she will still be grieving.
But eventually it will be a good idea talking to her about getting her another pet.
As nice as it would be to surprise someone, a pet isn't the right gift to surprise with.
But we must remember that old people do tend to be very lonely, especially once their partners have passed away, and after a while another pet will fill her world with happiness again.
Make sure it's a nice friendly cat though, and not one that's aggressive and likes to scratch.

Answer 10

If you really want to help her,let her decide if she is ready for another one. Many elderly people are so attached that getting another is betrayal. If she is ready, take her on a day trip to an animal shelter. Many times in cases like that a cat and a person make this personal connection and those are usually just the right match. They usually adopt each other.

Answer 11

Try to find her an older cat (2 yrs or so). A kitten may be too rambunctious for her. An older cat will already have outgrown the kitten playfulness, but will definitely need love.
Visit your local humane society where you can interact with the cats and see which one may suit her best. Good Luck!