The men I have been dating lately have been such jerks when I tell them I have the herps. Although I am an honest person I'm considering not even telling potential partners that I have it. After all I wasn't given a choice about it!
2006-08-24 11:16:43 · 16 answers · asked by Phoenix 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ STDs
You need to tell every single one of them that you have the STD BEFORE you have sex with them.
I know how you feel honey, I wasn't given a choice either when I got genital herpes. You need to tell them though. It's not fair to them if you don't.
How are you telling these guys? Maybe it's the way you are telling him. I have personally told every guy I have dated before I slept with them that I have genital herpes and I have NEVER had a bad reaction to it. Maybe I've just been lucky or maybe it's the way that I tell them. Are you telling these guys right when you met them? They honestly don't need to know unless you are getting serious or are starting to become more sexual with each other.
If you want you can email me about it and I'd be happy to talk to you about it. Best wishes!
2006-08-25 09:41:44 · answer #1 · answered by Alli 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-02 18:48:52 · answer #2 · answered by Pedro 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-09-02 04:04:38 · answer #3 · answered by Wallace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-06 10:47:44 · answer #4 · answered by lucrecia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be honest about having herpes however every guy that you meet you don't need to have sexual contact with. When you find the right person you want to sleep with then you need to talk about all STDs. If you are looking for understanding from every guy you meet your not going to get it. Really listen to these guys about what they are looking for in a woman and what kind of woman they want to be with and you can just put it in the conversation "a disease free woman?" and if they say yes then you know that person is not for you. Now some may say this may not always work but some guys out there still consider dating as just having a causal relationship meaning they want sex. If that's what you are looking for then I suggest finding someone who will not have a problem with it like someone who has herpes to but if you want a serious relationship with a man then you are going to have to find that one that will accept you.
2006-08-24 11:46:31 · answer #5 · answered by deathtolove 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes ...i can relate as i also have herpes ... i get the outbreaks on my face (chin) area... really noticeable...anyways i think you should be honest and tell them ... i wasn't happy when i got it ... i didn't even know what it was... or who gave it to me...i was a very angry person .... and i also find if you are honest and right up front with most men they can handle it....especially if they are into you ...and if they like and respect you....if they don't then they were not worth it in the first place... and as stated earlier by another reader you just have to learn to be careful especially during outbreaks and such...and when you explain this to them it makes it easier... i mean come on my doctor told me herpes is no more than someone having a cold sore in the corner of their mouth or chicken pox as a child so what is all the horror about if you explain it a little different you will get a different response.....good luck....honestly i don't have that much of a problem .... but i don't have vaginal herpes either i don't know if that matters or not but anyways good luck....
2006-08-24 13:03:31 · answer #6 · answered by fantasia91273 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it's hard, but you need to be the honest and responsible one. Most people think they know a lot more than they really do about herpes. Before you can effectively explain the virus to someone else, you need to educate yourself. Once you've done that, you'll see that it doesn't have to be a big deal. At that point, the right words will come a lot easier. Good luck
2006-08-24 13:42:28 · answer #7 · answered by capi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you need to tell your partners that you have Herpes so they can take precaution so the won't get it from you. But, if you do decide not to tell them, then you should atleast use protection to make sure you don't spread it to them.
2006-08-24 11:26:00 · answer #8 · answered by Carrie! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think my boyfriend handled it really well with me. We dated (didn't have sex) for quite awhile, and then he told me one night that having sex with him could be risky and he wanted me to know everything before we did anything. So, I was able to take some time, educate myself about the HSV, talk to friends, and assess how much I like him and if he is worth the risk. He is on medication to suppress his outbreaks, we are very careful, and lots of communication. In the end I felt it showed alot about his character that he told me first and I felt even stronger feelings towards him in the end. We have been together for almost a year now, I am still negative for HSV, and our relationship just keeps getting better.
Good luck - if he is worth anything he will understand your situation
2006-08-25 08:47:07 · answer #9 · answered by april_h2469 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely yes. My husband told me first and we were very careful. I did not come down with it until our child was two years old and we each take Valtrex, and almost never have outbreaks now.
It did not keep me from having sex with him ultimately. He is so worth it. You are also, I sense, from your desire to be honest. Keep trying, you will find someone who appreciates your honesty.
If you are having trouble meeting men who aren't scared of this, you might want to find a support group for this disorder and meet people through them.
2006-08-24 12:09:10 · answer #10 · answered by finaldx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋