When do you tell someone you have herpes?

Question

I was just diagnosed with genital herpes. I think I'm over the initial shock of it, but still trying to deal with it. I wasn't very sexually active so it's kind of weird that I have it. Anyway, my question is, when do you tell someone you potentially want to have a relationship with that you have it? Should you tell them right when you meet them, so they don't feel like you have lied later on? Or do you get to know them first and then tell them (before you get sexually active of course)?

I'd appreciate any advice from people dealing with this, thanks!

Answer 1

I was diagnosed with herpes when I was 18. If I meet a guy I like I wait until the second or third date. I tell him before we ever get near any kind of sexual activities. Even before "heavy petting". The reason I do this is so he doesn't make a decision to sleep with me anyway just because he is horny. I also tell him to talk with his Dr. or do some research on it before he decides. I have never gotten a really bad reaction from anyone when I have told them. They appreciate me caring about their health and choices. I wish the guy who gave it to me had been this way. He not only knew he had it, but he was having a full outbreak at the time. I will never do that to someone. By the way. I got married at 19 to someone who didn't have it. We got divorced three years later and he still did not have it. It is possible to not pass it on but never rely on that. Honesty is best. Also I had 2 children since the diagnosis, so you will be able to have kids if you want. If you do become pregnant be completely honest with your Dr. Your life isn't over. Good luck.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

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Answer 4

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Answer 5

You're getting a lot of good answers here, except for the brat that said 'ewww'....

My approach, when I have to tell someone, is this: I will wait until we are clearly in the mindset of 'dating' more seriously. If it is HSV2 personally I think it is OK to kiss somone if you don't have a cold sore on mouth or genital, b/c having a genital infection does not mean you shed in the mouth. If you've had an outbreak you'll know where it is.

When you are ready to tell, pick a time and place that is comfortable. For example, go out for coffee in the evening, or bring it up during dinner. Just do it someplace where you're not about to start going at it... the partner will have it on their mind then and will associate foreplay with being told. From what I hear, more people are OK with it than you would think, provided there is honesty upfront and you take consideration to the risks...

I think I just got HSV2 from my wife, who was having an affair with an infected partner and having unprotected sex. However, like someone else said, it could have been latent in my body for many years and never had an outbreak till now... I'll never know...

If you want to talk, ping me...

Answer 6

I tested positive for herpes around 6 years ago, when I was still in college and had a spupid one-night stand. I am sure a lot of women will say this but believe me I never did that sort of thing. I just made mistake that one time and, suddenly, it seemed like I was going to have to live with the consequences for the rest of my life. The worst part was feeling I would never date guys again. After all, who wants to go out with a person who has blisters around her you-know-what? But after somebody share this video https://tr.im/r6kTW everything has changed. Not only was I able to remove all traces of the herpes virus from my system in less than twenty days, but I was also able to start dating again. I even met my soulmate and I'm so blessed to write that just last week, in front of many people in a restaurant, he got down on one knee and proposed to me!! This program offered me the chance to be happy again, and to experience true love.

Answer 7

There are two types of herpes simplex virus: HSV-1 and HSV-2. Both virus types can cause sores around the mouth (herpes labialis) and on the genitals (genital herpes). Cold sores are caused by the herpes simplex virus (HSV).
Cold sores sometimes called fever blisters, are groups of small blisters on the lip and around the mouth. The skin around the blisters is often red, swollen, and sore. The blisters may break open, leak a clear fluid, and then scab over after a few days. They usually heal in several days to 2 weeks.
The herpes simplex virus usually enters the body through a break in the skin around or inside the mouth. It is usually spread when a person touches a cold sore or touches infected fluid—such as from sharing eating utensils or razors, kissing an infected person, or touching that person's saliva. A parent who has a cold sore often spreads the infection to his or her child in this way. Cold sores can also be spread to other areas of the body.
Luckly there is a cure for herpes https://tr.im/70f88

Answer 8

Yes, it is an awful shock; part of it being that someone wasn't honest with you.
It would be better to wait until you feel that a relationship is getting more intimate. Just don't blurt it out, and don't tell her if you are both steamed up, passion may take over reason.

I would suggest a at a quiet relaxed time when you are both feeling comfortable. At first your friend may be a bit shocked, too. So give her time to think about it and don;t pressure her. If there's something really right between you, she'll come around.
Good luck.

Answer 9

I got diagnosed with herpes type 2 about seven years ago, when I was still in college and had a spupid one-night stand. I know a lot of girls will say this but I swear I never did that sort of thing. I jud made mistake that one time and, suddenly, it seemed like I was going to have to live with the consequences for the rest of my life. The worst part was feeling I could never date guys again. After all, who wants to go out with a girl who has sores around her you-know-what? But after a friend share this video https://tr.im/M4UKW everything has changed. Not only was I able to remove all traces of the herpes virus from my system in less than three weeks, but I was also able to start dating again. I even met the man of my dreams and I`m so blessed to write that just last week, in fornt of everyone in a crowded restaurant, he got down on one knee and proposed to me!! This program gave me back the change to be happy, and to experience true love. Now I want to help you share this the world.

Answer 10

I am absolutely terrified and I feel so alone. I just found out last week that I tested positive for hsv1 and 2. I have been with the same man for the past 10 years and within the last year found out that he has cheated on me with numerous women. I am so scared that I can give it to my children by kissing them and them eating with me...I feel like my whole life has changed. And even though the nurses, my doctor, and websites say that a lot of people have it I still feel like I am by myself. My self esteem has dropped and I feel like I have been used up. But now, My life is very happy.

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