should i just go elope? so i don't offend any one and then just have a small reception at a park or something?

Question

i dont want to do a different tridition then my fiances family but i want to have my tradition hes mien and im white

if i do the traditonal mein (type of chinese wedding that lasts 3 days) then my family wont accept me being cathlic and if i get married my way then his family will never accept me

Answer 1

First off, most of the ppl who have responded have no idea what "Mien" is, so yes some of them have legit answers but most of them dont even know what their talking about. Having a traditional mien wedding in no way contradicts your religion, if you knew anything about Mien people you would know that the wedding isnt something religious (though it can be) its a way to celebrate the union of two ppl, and to have the union recognized by the Mien community as husband and wife. It is also a great honor for the parents, so in short.....having a Mien wedding will NOT affect your religious standings what so ever. There are also ceremonies that only last one day, but you didnt know that did you? Believe me, they wont want to do a traditional 3 day wedding with you for the mere fact that your not Mien. Im not trying to be mean here, but when that happens its because the brides family has requested it.......and its not something most parents ever want to do. Not only is a wedding like that costly and strenuous, its time consuming with a lot of traditions that mean nothing to you. Obviously this would not be a concern if you had done your research, but you didnt even bother taking the time check your spelling. Have some respect for his parents and the rest of the Mien community, educate yourself before making assumptions.

Answer 2

It does NOT sound like you WANT to elope, girl! "Just go elope..." "reception at a park or SOMETHING..." What is "Mien?" I really gotta get up on my geography because I canNOT connect that to a country. Anywho, honey YOU are the bride and the day is all about YOU and your honey. Talk amongst yourselves and proceed... pay heed that your families love you but don't decide to do something based on what you DON'T want. Do it based on what you DO want. God can give you the desires of your heart. He did it for me and even made the impossible happen!

Answer 3

Tradition is a difficult issue to address when you're blending cultures. However, it is up to you and your fiance, how you plan to start the rest of your lives together. Because your family is catholic, they want to be certain you wed in favor of receiving blessings as they know it. The same goes for your fiances family.

The thing is, there is only one God. Unfortunately, we all become selfish (culturally) as to who worships Him properly. It sounds to me like you two are going to have to seriously discuss this issue and perhaps have a family meeting, where both sides explain the importance of each tradition.

I thought I had a tough situation. I decided against a wedding simply because of the guest list and bridal party differences. I feel for you.

Answer 4

your wedding is your day, however if you don't want to elope, then now days there are ways to incorporate both religions into a ceremony, I am not real familiar, with the first mentioned religion, but i am sure there is clergymen that you could get these answers from, good luck, remember we love our families, however when you get married you are creating a new family of your own.

Answer 5

Honey you do whatever makes you and your mate happy. Weddings are too much and too stressful. If you want to elope that is perfectly fine, it's still a marriage and it's still beautiful before God. I applaud you!

Answer 6

You have to have the kind of wedding you want. Sure it's nice to think of others, but really, this is your day. Don't set yourself up for any regrets you'll have to live with for the rest of your life.

Answer 7

ahhh yes you should just elope. Trust me i wish i had the guts to do that. instead i will be smiling at 450 people this october 425 whom ive never wanted to see.

Answer 8

I just discussed this with my fiance, we decided his family is really important to us and that it would crush them if we didn't include them. My family isn't worried but we aren't close. So it just depends.

Answer 9

hi look I'm not married or anything but i think you should do what you want to do if they don't like it then too bad you love the other person right? so go for it.