Who do you love more your spouse or children?

Question

A big deal was made about this on Oprah quite a while back. This woman claimed she loved her spouse more than her children, and the reaction was mostly negative with a lot of people asking, why she was even bothering to compare the loves. Even on the message boards the reaction was a mix of positive and negative.

So what do you think? Who do you love more, your children or your spouse?

BTW heres the link to the message boards

http://boards.oprah.com/WebX?14@86.8ejEckPxUZt.7@.f09052e!skip=0&view=C

Answer 1

Since I don't have a spouse or children right now in my life, so I must say...no comment?!

Answer 2

I wonder if you feel this way b/c the man you would love more is not the father of your children, the person who you have built your entire life with. My husband is my entire word, along with my kids. I was married when I was 18 and he was 23. We have done everything together - started from scratch with him cleaning up a farm, building a house, building a life. Then came children. I love my children very much, and I cannot really say I love one thing more than the other. Yes - seconding what MT said - husband came first, before children. Children were not even on our minds then. Husband will stay, be with me forever. Children will likely leave.

Answer 3

I have no children of my own so I would say my spouse. I have 2 step sons and I love them so much, but a different kind of love than their father. This question is like asking you do you love your right arm or left arm more. It's the same love.

Answer 4

I love them both in different ways. I would have to say that I love my children more though. I know that I would absolutely get rid of my spouse if he didn't treat my children right or if he hurt them in any way.
There would be no choice between my spouse and my kids, my kids come first always!

Answer 5

I remember the show and I do agree with what the woman was trying to say: I am in love with my husband, he is the person I have chosen to spend the rest of my life with. He is my best friend, my support, and my family above and before anyone else.

We chose to have children, to add to our love and to enrich our family by growing and living the world with them. I love my children for the gifts they truly are. They add to my relationship with my husband, and I love him even more now, as a father and husband to me as a mom, than I did before they were born.

It's not a question of who i love the most, rather it's that I love my husband and children on different levels. Neither of which is any less powerful or important.

Answer 6

what a stupid question. of course you love your children. they are your flesh and blood. a spouse is just a man
and if y our spouse is not the father of your children then you have real issues
you can have any number of men in your lives but your kids are yours. its"s your children who will love you when you get old and needy and that is when they will repay all your love. If you have never given love then then you will be all alone because the spouse will be long gone
If any of this is hard for you to understand then DON"T HAVE KIDS. if all you want out of life is a man then stick to men and for the love of god DONT REPRODUCE. That way you will not create unhappy people
can you imagine how a child would feel to know that mummy loves a man more she loves him or her

Answer 7

doggie no spouse or children yet, but bf is nice too. Have 2 places in the heart one for the dog and one for the BF. I think most people have separate places for those, but if it is a 2nd marriage I bet the kids come 1st. Personally when a man tells me his kids come 1st I tell him I do not have room in my life for a man who does not have room in his heart for me. I just say be with your kids then. It is okay I understand the kids are the priority so I get lost and get a man with no kids like my BF. I come 1st with him.

Answer 8

It is not that you love wither one more. It is a different kind of love for both. You do not love your children the way that you love a spouse and you do not love your spouse the way you love your child. If you did that would be gross.

Answer 9

I think if I had children I would probably love my spouse more. I don't know yet though. . . . I'm only 21 . . . but I'm not sure because I love my mom as much as I love my siblings.

Answer 10

I have spent my life showing my children and grandchildren just how much i love them and they have always known that if a decision had to be made of choosing between them and a man it would be them i chose. example my new husband decided he was jealous of my children and grandchildren and told me i just had to choose between them i laughed & asked him where he wanted the divorce papers sent to. He looked at me and said your getting old and no one will want you in the years to come if you lose me and I told him I had a mirror thank you very much and it said i still looked pretty good and i didn't need a man to make me happy but i did need my babes and there love because it did make me very happy so goodbye. He gave up and asked me to forgive him and would i not send him away from all of us he's been a doll ever since. There is no way a man can understand that the love we women have for them is different from the love we have for our kids they get jealous for nothing Thank You Grandma Rosey

Answer 11

I guess some religions believe that you should love your spouse more because they can always gives you another child. Personally, I feel that a child is a part of you and as a parent your life should be based around loving that child.