Why do I always get screwed over by guys?

Question

I just got dumped. It seems to happen a lot, but I don't know why. I'm a nice person. I'm smart, beautiful, but perhaps I fall too fast for a guy. How can I stop doing this because I seem to let my emotions get the best of me. Any advice?

Answer 1

There seems to be a pattern here. If you find that you are getting dumped alot, remember that the number one common denominator is you. Romantic relationships are no different than friendships...if people like you, it shows, if they don't it shows. Also, you may be attracted to the wrong type of guys...those who may be emotionally unavailable, commitment-shy, etc. Additionally, ask yourself if you are too eager to take the next step in the relationship a little too fast. If this is the case, it can make some men crawl into their caves. There are tons of reasons as to why you may be "screwed over by guys". I'm sure you're a beautiful and smart person...but I agree with another answerer, perhaps you ought to take a break from dating and nurture yourself and to reevaluate past relationships.

If you give 100% of yourself and if he does not give back 100% then perhaps he is not worth it. I believe relationships are give and take. I also learned that it doesn't matter how much a person gives, if the other person does not appreciate, value, or reciprocate. It is only worth it to give so much of yourself to someone who can value that and not take you for granted.

**Also remember that although it may seem exciting to play hard to get at first, if all that guy is after is the chase, once the chase is over, so is the relationship.

Answer 2

Ask him why. Don't do it while crying and being all emotional though. A lot of men don't deal well with emotions. Tell him that you would like to know why it didn't work with him b/c maybe it's something you could work on in the future. I'm not saying change who you are, I'm just saying that everyone has things that they need to work on, and he may give you some input that could help in future relationships, and in other areas of your life. I would also suggest taking some time out of the dating scene as someone else suggested. If you are still talking about your ex in every conversation with your friends, family, and future bf prospects you aren't ready to start fresh and move on. GOOD LUCK!!!

Answer 3

Seems like you kind of answered you own question. You are getting too emotionally invested before getting to know them well enough to see if they are worth investing in. I knew a girl like you once. Cute, really nice and sweet, and ALWAYS getting screwed over by guys. I never wanted to tell her anything because we weren't that close and she never asked me but I'll tell you(if applicable of course). This girl was so eager to be in a relationship that she never took heed of the warning signs that all shady dudes give off. She would always give 100% of herself when she was barely getting 50% back-if that. Also when she liked a guy she would literally "jock" them and do anything and everything for them so they would know she was interested. The only message that type of behavior sends a guy is "I'm here to use and I'm NOT hard to get". You cannot wear your heart on your sleeve like that and not think someone will take advantage to get what they want.

Answer 4

there is always the age old tactic used by countless hot women called "hard-to-get" try using it and u might just have a line of men at ur doorstep. remember the trick is to think about what happened after ur relationship ends and learn from it so that u do not repeat the same mistake again during the next relationship. using ur brains instead of ur heart should be done sometimes but not all the time or it will not be the real u that ur next bf falls for

Answer 5

Because you keep getting involved with them. You get too involved with them before getting to know them first. Don't give them ANY sex unless you've been with him for about 6 months- a year if he is nice and treats you GOOD. If he pesters you about sex or threatens to break up - LET HIM! Lots of guys REALLY just want to get between your legs, and they will dump you if you give them the sex right away or say no right away. The best way to know you have a decent guy is to make him wait a long time. If he does, (AND HE ISN'T CHEATING) then he's worth your time. Don't go for @ssholes or do things you don't want! The guy will be GONE if he gets you pregnant.

Answer 6

Find out what it is you want in a guy instead of falling for guy after guy just because he's cute. Get to know them before you let yourself fall emotionally for them. Don't be too clingy either. When you know what you want, and you find someone who has it to offer you, you'll have better luck with it lasting longer than the past ones. BUT, break ups happen. Also learn to realize it's just part of the lousy cycle and get yourself over them faster.

Answer 7

I'm a firm believer that you teach people how to treat you
for example if a guy some something disrespectful to you and you don't call him on it, he gets the message that its OK to treat you badly and will continue to do so
secondly, you didn't mention your age but I'm guessing that you are quite young and let me tell you guys are pretty much jerks until they hit the mid 20's
could be you are looking for the wrong qualities in a guy and that is why you are getting the same kind of guy....for example, i have a friend who wants a "hot" guy but cant quite figure out why they tend to be big players, jerks, etc...maybe if she concentrated less on looks and more on personality then she would have better luck...if that makes sense

Answer 8

Concentrate in other things ......guys are out there..going no where....you need to concentrate in your person , develop more than a beauty figure and a cute face, nourish yourself of the wonderful things life has besides GUYS....that way they will appreciate more your company and you wont feel so disappointed by being dumped, men are and will always be the ones to dump you ..unless you learn how to dump them first...by loving yourself and not let them run your life...

Answer 9

Thats gonna take a lengthy time period you ought to have a jealos streak or perhaps some anger subject matters, hows your self esteem tresting you at the moment. shop being a ***** and also you'll get what you receive Nothin! Be your self, ignore about some thing are you scared you receives **** on with the aid of this guy at a particular aspect, perhaps then you actually commence treating him like crap. perhaps your scared to coach that vunerable side, in spite of the undeniable fact that that is area of you so apoligize for being a ***** and your moody thoughts and mean IT!!!! once you talk to someone except your self, have appreciate for them that they even chosen to confer with you in any respect,, reason particularly who the hell are you and what makes you so a lot extra effective than them that you'll be able to take care of them the way you do? warm N chilly? Moody ***** say your sorry and pass on theres no longer some thing to do with your sorrow at that aspect, except enable it go and delivers it to some different person its aditting your faults

Answer 10

You may want to consider a little recreational dating. That is,
dating without the major purpose of living for ever after with the guy.

(for those of you who have heard my spiel, stop reading. This
is canned...)

Dating is a skill: The only way you get better at it is to do it.
Ask people out that you like, but aren't salivating for, and
learn to interact with them. As you do so and people find
that you are appealing, you gain confidence.

As you gain confidence, you also become more appealing
and you can broaden the people who you ask out with
a higher probability of getting "yes" answers. Even if you
get "no"s, you now have enough perspective to not let
it alter how you interact with other people.