I work 60 hours , do all the laundry, and cutting a yard that is close to 12 acres big. I do this with a push mower. I cannot afford a riding mower. I ask my son to help me; his Dad is a diabetic with foot problems and he will help as much as he can, but his foot is hurting and I do not want him cutting grass. My son does not have a job, nor is he in college yet. He hates outside work and refuses to help me. Any suggestions?
2006-08-14 13:36:08 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I HAVE NOT READ ONE ANSWER YET BECAUSE I POSED A VERY SIMILAR QUESTION LAST WEEK ABOUT MY SON WHO TURNED 19 YESTERDAY TAKING[NOT TAKING]OUT GARBAGE.10 PEOPLE SAID KICK HIS BUTT[NOT VIOLENT TO MY KIDS THANKS]7 SAID IT WAS MY FAULT FOR BEING A BAD MOM AND I DESERVED IT,OBVIOUSLY THESE PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE A TEEN IN THE WORLD TODAY,I THINK WITH ME IT IS PARTLY BECAUSE HIS SCHOOL LIFE AND THE WORLD IS SO SCARY AND VIOLENT THAT I DO TEND DO LOVE ON HIM AND EASE UP ON HIM,MY SON JUST GOT A JOB SO NOW HE HAS NO CHORES,I HAD BOTH,BUT TODAYS GENERATION IS SPOILED!!!THE MEDIA TELLS THEM WE CAN'T PUNISH THEM AND THEY HAVE THEIR RIGHTS[BS]BUT THE ONLY THING THAT WORKED FOR ME IS I TOOK THE MOUSE FROM THE COMPUTER TO WORK,I PRAY YOU GET SOME NEEDED HELP!SERIOUSLY JUST READ THE ANSWERS,NONE OF THOSE ARE THINGS YOU HAVEN'T THOUGHT OF I AM SURE,MAYBE SHE NEEDS HER SON HOME?MY SON IS THE SWEETEST KID IN THE WORLD AND I LOVE HIS COMPANY SO KICKING THEM OUT AND BEATING HIM IS NOT A GREAT ANSWER,TAKE AWAY COMPUTERS,X-BOX ETC.GOOD LUCK!!
2006-08-15 11:23:20 · answer #1 · answered by Cherokee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are his parent. He should not be telling you what he will and will not do! You are just so exhausted from the workload you have, you aren't seeing things clearly - which is understandable.
He is living in YOUR house and it sounds as if he is contributing next to nothing. He has no job. He's not in school. Who is paying for his car insurance, his gas, his cell phone??? I am thinking that is you.
You have tremendous control here, but you aren't using it. Cut him off. Give him two weeks to find a job, get in school, or find a new place to live. And stop paying for his stuff right now! Tell him he starts TODAY helping around the house, helping out with the yard work or his phone and monetary help stop tomorrow. He can only get away with this crap as long as you allow him too. Right now he is doing nothing and getting everything he wants. He has no motivation to change. Give him a reason to get off his dead lazy butt :-) You need a break!!
2006-08-14 13:50:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your son is getting a free ride because you are letting him get away with it. He needs his place to live, a job, his own bills to pay. Obviously he is not concerned about anyone's welfare but his own or he would willingly take responsibility for the mowing and helping around the house. I would no longer ASK him to help. I would tell him the rules and expectations in YOUR home. He could be a cheerful helper or I would give him a month to move. If you don't make any rules with this guy, he's not going to grow up.
2006-08-14 13:59:05 · answer #3 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes cut all cost of money anthing you give him to injoy life food everything cut off from him i use to be the say way till i learn the hard way. if friend come over tell them they cannot come over no more embares him real bad he will learn or best bet take him to a prison with young people they get put out of there home cuz the dont help out or being him to the morgue trust me it will work i was his age too but now i am in the US Marines do what i can i been threw everything i told you an i did change me an so other people i know
2006-08-14 13:56:02 · answer #4 · answered by sgtmorgan2003 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to him that at 19 he needs to help around the house or otherwise get a part time job to be able to pay you board & keep. With the board money you can hire the kid down the street to help out in the garden. There would be heaps of kids that would like to make some pocket money.
2006-08-14 13:44:12 · answer #5 · answered by deedee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son grow to be 2 a million/2 formerly he reported something except mama and dada. He grow to be in speech treatment and it merely grow to be no longer assisting. in some unspecified time sooner or later he woke and spoke 3 be conscious sentences and his talking merely took off from there, in a month he grow to be able to carry an complete verbal replace with every person- it grow to be incredible. He might want to do all of it alongside, he merely did not opt to! And now he's 7 and has a wide vocabulary, reads tremendous, spells fantastic, ect... So i recognize you're worried because we certianly were yet somewhat quickly he will be talking your ear off! good luck!
2016-11-25 01:24:00 · answer #6 · answered by vogt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is 19; if he refuses to help out or get a job, kick him out. Maybe even take in a boarder that will work in exchange for rent.
2006-08-14 14:03:58 · answer #7 · answered by Albert F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will do as little as allowed. If he refuses to do outside work, then fine. He can do the cooking, cleaning and ect. If not he needs to move out and mooch else where. I realize he is your son and you love him but, you are not doing him any favors by letting him coast through life.
2006-08-14 13:43:44 · answer #8 · answered by aggie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My thought would kick him to the curb and see how much he likes that Idea. Either help around the house or get a job. Or find your own way outside my house. that is what i would say to him
2006-08-14 13:43:49 · answer #9 · answered by shadow_watt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop giving him allowance, or buying him things, even his toilettries, etc. You should talk to him and tell him that you're planning to rent out his room for extra income to afford a gardener and he has a month to find a job and to find a place. That should wake him up.
2006-08-14 13:42:20 · answer #10 · answered by the_memory_of_ashes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋