Being a gentleman, I feel it is my responsibility to pay. I don't expect her to pay on our dates even if it is her idea. She does offer but I always insist on paying which she doesn't seem to mind. However, I don't want her to think I expect something in return or that I don't think she can afford to pay. I am guessing I make about double what she does. If we have been going out longer, I would feel more comfortable with her paying. Should I let her pay?
2006-08-14 13:35:40 · 19 answers · asked by j j 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's a good idea to give in to her once in a blue moon. This will make her feel better and not make her feel guilty. She's letting you know (indirectly) that she's not all about your money and wants to return the favor to you (consider yourself lucky). If you really feel uncomfortable about her paying, maybe you can suggest splitting the bill. You sound like a gentleman with traditional values but in this day and age there's no harm in letting the woman have her way once in a while.
2006-08-14 13:46:43 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, don't let her pay, if she cannot afford it. She is only trying to be polite. If you make more than she does, it is only right that you pay. She will love you just as much, and respect you for your protective nature towards her. I would not feel good if someone let me pay, but if you think she really wants to, then let her pay for some inexpensive things. Like for ice cream, or something, and then she can be treating you to something too.
2006-08-14 20:41:51 · answer #2 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it really depends on the woman, but sense she doesn't seem to mind you paying, I say keep paying. When my husband and I were dating, I offered to pay and he would never let me. I didn't feel like I "owed" him something and I don't think that most women would. I just understood that he was courting me. Long story short I did marry him so it worked for us.
2006-08-14 20:43:12 · answer #3 · answered by I love sushi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With the advent of feminism, there is no longer a requirement that the
guy always pay for things.
If you ask her to go some place, it is customary (but not required) to
be willing to pay for her. If you mutually decide to go some place, its
perfectly reasonable to share expenses.
The longer you know each other (and the more you are aware of
each other's circumstances), the more you can take account of each
other's finances.
That is, you may both want to go some place that she can't afford
to go - so you pay. Or visa versa.
2006-08-14 20:40:57 · answer #4 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a big deal or anything, but sure, let her pay. It might make her feel as if she is contributing to the relationship and not just you because you pay all the time. She might want to pay to let you know shes not just using you. Hopefully shes not pulling a fakey on you by offering to pay and knowing youll pay.
2006-08-14 20:57:51 · answer #5 · answered by Elle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really up to you. I don't think she will think anything of it if you let her pay once, especially since you've paid all the other times. But I definitely agree with you on the last point. Once you all have been dating for a while and are bf/gf, she should definitely pay every once in a while.
2006-08-14 20:40:34 · answer #6 · answered by lilgracie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes.
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2006-08-14 20:38:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she is serious then counter offer pay half, If she still wants to then let her. Then make sure the next time (if you are serious about her) get her a gift.
2006-08-14 20:49:35 · answer #8 · answered by retired_afmil 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she keeps offering, it's because she wants to pay. Let her from time to time, even if it does make you feel a little strange, she'll appreciate that you respect her and her earning power.
2006-08-14 20:41:07 · answer #9 · answered by KyLeth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she really insists, let her split the bill. If she insists more, let her pick up the tab. I think it's only fair. I always try to pay my way or pick it all up.
2006-08-14 20:38:52 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋