I have been dating this guy for 10 months. Our relationship has gotten rocky because he is very possesive and controlling. The other night i went to a family bbq and he got really upset because he thought guys were going to try to talk to me and he started crying . In the beggining of the relationship he was very kind and i thought it was kind of cute that he worried about me but now things are getting out of control.One night i told him i would end things with him and told me he was going to kill himself and he was serious. I cried and pleaded for him not to do it. I never cried so much in my life. It was so hurtful. And after that night things started to change its like any moment he could do it and its like he controls me with it. One part of me wants to be with him but since im going to college in 2 weeks things are going to be EXTRA hard. I dont think it will work. But i lost my virginity with him august 2... and i felt it was kind of a mistake... i dont know what to do...help
2006-08-14 12:44:27 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he is being controlling by threatening suicide, I really don't think he has any intentions of going through with it. You need to get away from him and stay away from him. Forget about losing your virginity, it's water under the bridge now. If you think it was a mistake, then it probably was.I think you should have a long talk with your parents or your mom about this and get their/her opinion of the situation. If you are friends with his mom, have your mom invite her over for lunch at your house and explain the situation to both of them at the same time. I agree that you should change dorms, phone numbers, or anything else that could allow your boyfriend to contact you. Leaving for college early is a very good idea. I think if you talk to his mom you could leave a letter with her for your boyfriend explaining everything, to be given to him after you are gone. You will be much better off without him, believe me. I hope this helps.
2006-08-14 13:48:23 · answer #1 · answered by organic gardener 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds dangerous. Many young guys can't handle getting dumped. This is why when a women is murdered the boyfriend/ husband is the first suspect. If you think college will be harder with this nut case around you are wrong. This is what i would do. Seriously. Don't tell him where you are living at college. If you already have told him where you will be living then change dorms. Make sure all of your address and phone numbers are unlisted. Change email. And tell him your leaving on sat before classes. ( to be with him) Then you leave on Tuesday. Call him Friday and say its over. Then call his parents and tell them about the suicide. Tell him you NEVER want to see or talk to him again. If he shows up get a PPO. Its time to move toward adulthood in your life. He is ether a freak that might kill himself or a manipulator tring to control you with threats.----Don't sweat your virginity, its way over rated.
2006-08-14 13:02:43 · answer #2 · answered by brooklyn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isnt easy for you, and I understand. You should tell someone, someone of a proffesional carrer. If you want to end it with him, and he keeps on threatening himself, then call the police. Say my bf says he is going to kill himself and you are scared. They will take care of it.
My mom was going to kill herself the day after my dad told her that they wanted a divorce. My dad called the cops and told them to stop over, and informed them that she may be suicidal. The police found her w/ the guns out and loading them. They sent her to the MHI, but was later released with medication.
I hope this helped!
2006-08-14 12:56:53 · answer #3 · answered by hello_kitty_2004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just to let you know he knew you wouldn't leave him if he told you that he was going to kill himself and that is why he said that. Its happened to me before if you don't break up with him soon he will start to hurt you and abuse you. Get out NOW for your safety. I'm not trying to scare you I'm trying to protect you. I wish you luck and hope that you get out safe.
2006-08-14 12:54:51 · answer #4 · answered by frankiegirl1122 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would alert his parents or next of kin and do exactly what you know you need to do and I wouldn't hesitate. Be firm, kind, and gentle but it won't get any better or easier, EVER.
2006-08-14 12:53:19 · answer #5 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be very cautious. This may be his way of controlling you and that means trouble already. Just tell him when he is ready to do it, don't let you know about it.
2006-08-14 12:52:14 · answer #6 · answered by mrcricket1932 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can lose your virginity, but don't lose your happiness or any more things on him.
If he is serious, let him slove his problem before coming back to you.
2006-08-14 12:56:46 · answer #7 · answered by happie_julie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use college as an excuse.. then disappear!
2006-08-14 12:55:59 · answer #8 · answered by lolitakali 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TELL SOMEONE YOU TRUST.
TELL SOMEONE YOU TRUST.
GET HIM HELP.
and if it gets really bad, call
the police or something.
its not okay for him or for you.
and totally not healthy.
2006-08-14 12:52:00 · answer #9 · answered by forksarelovely 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd get as far from him as I could.
2006-08-14 12:49:44 · answer #10 · answered by Iron Rider 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋