I really want to know this...how some people figure this?

Question

I see a lot of people here claim that parents who spank their children are "stupid", uncreative, and teaching violence. Care to provide credible links, or even anecdotal tales, and not just emotions?

Lets look at back in the day, when there was corporal punishment, prayer, and structure in the school systems...and most homes. I was the last of this generation (I'm a child of the 80's) and let me tell you, I NEVER talked back in school, no one blew up our schools, I NEVER disrespected any adult...especially not my parents!! God forbid! and you damn right I was afraid, but it was a HEALTHY fear. While I knew better than to sass my elders, I also knew how to properly address them, and I was loved dearly and spankings were few and far between. Not the only method of discipline used.

So I guess my mother was stupid. I guess my old teachers and principal were stupid. I feel I got a good foundation in life, on the contrary. I learned RESPECT. I learned discipline. Far from stupid IMO.

Oh, and I guess I am really violent. I've not a violent bone in my body. Never been incarcerated, or even in trouble with the law. I prefer talking to people who are nasty with me like I would prefer to be spoken to. I have never been in a fight, save for something I had to do that was life or death in the military. I served an honorable 10 years in the military, and have put myself through college. I'm raising a young boy that always gets compliments on his "good" behavior, even though to me, this is how a child is supposed to act. Not bad for stupidity, huh?

Answer 1

I agree, The other day we put our children in time out at my mother in laws home ( x-hippie ). She later recommended a book on positive parenting (very funny) as she never instilled discipline in any of her children, and now they all can't stand her. There is nothing wrong with a good old fashioned spanking. News flash they work.

Answer 2

I completely agree with spanking. (I said spanking, not beating, cause I know that some other parent is going to think that I am horrible for saying that, and say spanking is beating). 150 yrs ago kids would not have talked to their parents the way they talk now. If they did 'Pa' got out his belt and they didn't do it again. The problem with so many kids acting out and doing the crap that they are doing is because there are alot of parents who don't believe in a good ol' fashioned spanking. I like the way that things were done when I was a kid. Spankings and having to write "I will not hit my sister in the head with a baseball bat" 100 times.
We should go back to how it was done in the old days!

Answer 3

I am a child of the 80's also. There are others ways to punish children . spanking is not one of them unless it is the only thing that makes the child or children behave ,taking away things such as favorite toy or game . Things like that.And I was brought up much like you . I had respect and never talked
back to anyone but that was because I never had a spanking or any thing worse. And no your Mother was not stupid or anyone else that helped you in life . They are all good people.

Answer 4

I agree with the tsbr1963. I have three children ages 4, 6, and 12. I am a spanker and a time-outer and I was never spanked as a child<-----I was the spoiled baby of the family! It really depends on the child. Spankings and time out did not work for my first born, only losing privileges. As for my second child it only took one spanking when he was 2 and now I just give "the look" to him and he behaves. As for my third, time outs don't work unless I lock her in her room and then she destroys everything within sight and hurts herself. Spankings seem to work with her for a little while, but she is at the testing age and she wants to see how far she can get with me and what her consequences are for different things. I haven't tried losing privileges with my third yet, I'm still working on her. And then there is the girl/boy thing. My two older boys were alot different than their sister. Girls are a world different when it comes to everything I have mastered with my boys. I don't down the people who push time-outs cause if that works for their children so be it, but please don't think my child is like that, they need a spankin'!

Answer 5

I completely agree

I'm the mother of a 2 1/2 year old and a 1 1/2 year old. Both my daughters say please and thank you. My oldest says excuse me, yes sir, yes ma'am, sorry etc. They get spankings when they need it. I'm 20 years old and have cussed in front of my parents twice when I was younger. I have never been disrespectful. I graduated high school with a 4.0. I have never been in jail. I h\never even had a detention in school. I may have gotten pregnant at 17 but I don't live with my parents. Hell I don't even receive welfare; my fiance and I WORK to support our children. Imagine all that out of an adult who was spanked as a child.

Answer 6

RIGHT ON!!! I'm with you 150%!!! Kids today have NO respect for anyone...ESPECIALLY the people who brought them into this world..
I know that my mother NEVER back talked her parents..she was raised RIGHT!! And I was raised NOT to talk back to my elders...MY children...same as me...BUT they hang out with kids who tell their parents when they'll be home and the should shut the F up....What happened?!!

AND I'll spank the meaty part of any of my childrens' butts...It hurts my hand more than the part of the body that got over the fence last...BUT they will be respectful and well behaved young adults..

Answer 7

I think most of the problems are with the parents and not the children. I to grew up with corporal punishment administered very little and my mother only used her hand to my butt. But I had many friends who had parents who beat them with belts, hairbrushes, sticks, and even those old TV antennas they over did most of the time. Those new laws are to protect the children from abuse. For me with my kids discipline is more effective if I take away the X box or Pizza Night. As for behavior I watch and you know what they act as I do.

Answer 8

I agree. I have raised three really good kids...and, despite what one of the answerers said here, 'time outs' have been part of how I raised them. So were spankings. So were praises and compliments.

I am a firm believer in consequences. I think the failure today in raising kids is due to a failure to provide consequence. Screw up and get in trouble. Screw up really badly, and get a spanking.

None of my kids are violent, all are polite, all respect and expect consequence...whether it is for something good OR something bad.

Regarding my own intelligence....lets just say I have never wondered if I am bright....

Answer 9

These parents with these "time-outs" for punishment need to be smacked in my opinion. Time outs are usually the alternative to spanking these days, and it just makes me sick. Time outs only teach defiance--not discipline. In life, there is no such thing as sitting back and reflecting on your actions. Kids need to be spanked--and that's that.

Answer 10

There are many ways to disapline a child without inflicting pain on them. Would you tell your child that it is not right to hit another person? Of course you would. So, of course it is not right to hit your child. Take away a privilege, or something that they value. Put them on restriction, by not letting them go outside to play, put them in time out, by giving them time to think about their wrongful actions. Good for you that you turned out to be a good respectful, responsible person. I bet you would have turned out that way as well if you had been disaplined in another, maybe even better way. Children turn out to be good adults because of many things that their parents taught and did for them. Hitting is never right, but I would bet that most parents at one time or another have lost their temper and swatted their child at least once. That doesn't make it right, it just makes us parents human. Parents sometimes have to appologize too.